Page 18 of Retribution

“Look, as I mentioned before it was just a moment, nothing more. Moreover, I don’t do married men.”

I was quite confused. “What you talking about, woman?”

She began to walk away just as Spike rushed in with an update. “It’s time,” he said.

By the time I reached out front, Ciara was already climbing into the van with a group of men. I wanted to clarify her assumption, but it had to wait. As I boarded the SUV, I couldn’t help but wonder about what she said. Was that why she’d been pushing me away before Cory’s death? I didn’t know what to think and I had to rid myself of the thought to focus on what was at hand.

Ciara

I don’t know why I assumed he was married, but it didn’t matter. The fact remained that I heard him saying he loved someone and missed them. I didn’t have the strength or desire to fight for a man that belonged to another woman. If he’d been mine to begin with, it would have been another matter altogether.

Pushing Luca out of my mind I concentrated on the task ahead. We found Marco and his brother and were headed to the house. I decided to avoid Luca as I didn’t want distractions. Yet, being around him even now gave me some amount of calm. Joining the larger group of men in the back passenger seat of the van, I thought I’d be able to focus, but it wasn’t so. I found myself breathing short whenever I thought of my brother. My anger began to take hold of me and my heart pounded like crazy. I knew from the way I felt that I wouldn’t be able to control myself and that might mess up the operation.

I hadn’t cried since Cory died and I wondered if perhaps I needed to shed some tears. However, my eyes were as dry as a chalkboard. Shit, I couldn’t keep still while the men chatted about the Dragon Crew and all the shit they’d been doing. All the voice from the men began to bug me to the point of them being just noise. I wanted to scream, to tell them to shut the hell up but that would make me seem unhinged. I had to remain calm, for my own sake.

To zone out the noise, my mind settled on the image of my brother lying in my arms that day. I thought this image would help strengthen me, to prepare me for what we were about to do. I was never a weak woman, but tonight I wasn’t strong. I could feel that I was slipping and had no way of reeling in myself.

The only good thing about my thoughts was that we arrived at our destination quicker than I anticipated. The men disembarked the vehicle, leaving me inside while I tried to assemble my thoughts. Having no idea how long I sat there, I was started by someone coming into the vehicle.

“Ciara, you okay?” it was Luca.

My heart started racing erratically and I originally thought that it was because he arrived in the vehicle suddenly. But the twist in my lower abdomen and the butterfly feeling in my chest made me wonder.

“Yeah, I’m good.”

“I know you’re not good, and you know you’re not good. So, stop lying to me.”

“You’re one to talk,” I scoffed. “Aren’t you a beacon of truth!”

“Now I know there is definitely something bugging you and I ain’t leaving this vehicle until you talk to me.”

I grounded my teeth and replied, “Okay. You wanna know the truth? I can’t believe you’ve been telling everyone that I’m your woman even though we aren’t dating…”

“Is that what’s bothering you?” he argued.

“Quiet, I’m not done,” I retorted. “You’re a two-timing sonofabitch and to think I almost believed you!”

“You’re making no sense.”

“I heard you telling her how much you loved her and missed her.”

A sigh left him, and his shoulders relaxed. “Ha-ha-ha,” he laughed. “You think that was my woman?”

“Isn’t she?”

“And you think I’m married?” he asked, quite amused. “That was my kid. He’s nine years old and lives with his grandparents in Upper East Side.”

“You have a child?”

He reached over and took my hand. “Yes, but we can talk about that later. I think you should sit this one out, the boys and I will take care of Marco and Carlos.”

“No, this is my business, I can’t be weak now.”

“You’re not weak, you just lost your little brother.”

“Something is wrong with me, I keep feeling like I’m losing control.”

He shifted and came close to me, cupping my face. “Stay close to me and you’ll be fine. I promise.”

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