Page 31 of Spinning Out of Control

“Yeah, I can understand that,” Caleb replied. “Can I ask you a question?”

“Shoot,” I said, and he chuckled, giving my shoulder a nudge.

“If you could go anywhere in the world, where would you go?”

I blinked. “I like Edgewind.”

“Well, yeah. But if you could just travel the human world. Where would you want to go?”

I thought about all of the movies and things I had watched. I liked to watch documentaries about different countries and different eras in human history. The human world was so much bigger than this little town. But I had never been confident enough to even think about exploring it beyond the safe confines of our protected space. “I don’t know,” I finally said. “I think I would like to see everything. Your world has so many different places and people. I think it would be fascinating to explore it all.” I glanced over at him with a small smile. “Where would you want to go?”

“Hmm. I think I’m like you, I’d love to just travel the world. Though I’d love to see the old Egyptian pyramids, maybe go inside some of the old tombs. Pretend I was one of the not-stupid explorers in The Mummy.”

“What is The Mummy?” I asked, and Caleb’s eyes lit up.

“You never saw that?”

“No,” I said.

“Fuck, I know what we’re watching next,” Caleb said.

I giggled softly. “Okay.” I would watch anything Caleb wanted to, and seeing him excited about something made my insides dance.

We curled up in my web, and Caleb found the movie amongst my many streaming services. I nestled happily against him as we settled in to watch. “Oh, fuck, wait, there are bugs that eat people in this,” he said, pausing it and turning to me with concern. “Is that okay?”

I rolled all eight of my eyes, even though I gave him a grateful smile. “Yes, Caleb, I am not upset by bugs eating people. Or movies with giant spiders, or movies where spiders are killed, or anything like that.”

“Okay,” Caleb said with relief. “Just wanted to be sure.”

We sat and watched the movie, which was very exciting, and I was even more delighted by Caleb’s left hand resting on one of my legs for the entire thing, occasionally giving it a gentle squeeze without seeming to realize it.

It was a good movie, and Caleb told me about all of the actors he had had crushes on when he was younger. It was funny seeing him so animated about something, and it warmed my heart. “So, some humans like both males and females?” I asked.

Caleb nodded. “Yeah. Like me, I like males and females. What about you?”

I blinked. “I like you.”

He blushed, and I realized I had said the same thing to him before. “Right, but are you attracted to men or women, or both?”

“I have no idea,” I said honestly. “But you are attractive.”

He stared at me, going quiet for a moment, and I wondered if I had said something wrong. “Can I ask you something?”

“Yes, of course.” His voice was so soft that it had me worried.

“When you first met me and saw my… my injuries, what did you think of them?”

“I don’t know,” I admitted.

“Did they scare you? Or disgust you?”

“No,” I said, reaching up to brush my fingertip over his right cheek. “I understand that this is not how most humans typically look. But it is how you look, and I like it, because I like you.”

“Yeah?” he said, tipping his head more into my touch.

“Yes. I know you are not happy about it,” I said, watching his face carefully for any signs that I might be saying something I shouldn’t. “I know that you feel you lost something very important when you were in your accident. But one thing I learned in the monster world is that scars mean you survived. You fought your way free, and maybe you paid a price for it. But you’re alive because you survived whatever was trying to hurt you. That doesn’t mean that it doesn’t hurt or that you aren’t scared. But you still have your life, which is something you can’t ever get back once it’s lost.”

“God, Ter,” Caleb said, his blue eyes shimmering with a hint of tears. “You say some very profound shit.”

---