Page 27 of Tormenting Me

I realize I just sealed the fate of my piece of shit father, and while I should feel remorse. I don’t. Just knowing that he will no longer breathe the same air as I do makes me feel lighter. All that matters to me right now is this man, that is offering to free me from all the hurt.

“Come on, Ma Petite Mort, let’s order something to eat and then go sleep,“ Wes orders Chinese food, from the only place that is open this late, at my request, and once it arrives, I realize how hungry I am.

We have the array of take out containers spread out across his bed. He reaches for a remote and clicks a button. A projector screen drops from the rafters, and a streaming service menu appears. He hands me the remote. “Pick something to watch. I’m gonna grab us some drinks.”

When he returns, we settle in and devour the food, watching the movie I picked, and laughing at the cheesy lines and horrible acting. Wes laces his fingers in between mine, bringing my hand to his lips. “Can I ask you something?” I nod, swallowing the egg roll I had just shoved into my mouth. He turns to face me, and I feel like this is going to be a serious question.

“If I asked you the right way,” he clears his throat, “you know, like normal guys do. Would you say yes?”

My mouth hangs open. Is he doing what I think he’s doing? Is he asking me to be his girlfriend? No, Wes made a joke about marrying me. Oh fuck, is that what he’s about to do? My mind flashes back to his comment about the courthouse and the look in his eyes right now tells me I’m right. Oh, fuck. Breathe, Layne don’t pass out.

“I know it’s crazy. Fucking certifiable,” he chuckles, “but I can’t live my life without you being mine. Layne, this is the strongest desire I’ve ever had. You opened my eyes to a new possibility. A wife, fuck even kids.”

Kids? He wants kids.

It dawns on me that I didn’t even think about using protection when we had sex. Fucking idiot. As a virgin, I never considered the idea of contraception. Why use birth control when you aren’t having sex.

Wes studies my face, “What’s wrong?”

“Okay, this is going to sound stupid, especially since we’ve already had sex multiple times now. But, I know I’m clean being the virgin and all…” I nonchalantly wave my hand around trying to find the words to ask if he is clean too.

It click and he realizes what I’m trying to say. “You’re the only person I’ve been with in over a year. I’m clean, baby.”

Phew, thank goodness for that.

“What if I don’t want children, though? Would you still want to spend your life with me?” Kids were never part of my plan.

My words make him draw in a breath and he ponders what I’ve said. “Of course, I would. I’ll get a vasectomy tomorrow, if that’s what you want.”

Fuck, this man is amazing.

“I wouldn’t do it tomorrow,” I laugh, shaking my head at his willingness. “How about we sleep on it?” Wes is gorgeous, and I bet he would make the prettiest babies. I’m just hung up on my parents being so shitty that I assume I will be, too.

“What is it, baby? I can see you mulling over something.” Wes’s eyes search mine, concern all over his face.

“What if I’m as bad a parent as mine were? I would never forgive myself for bringing children into this world only to hurt them.” My heart flutters as his fingers weave in between mine, bringing my hand to his lips.

“Impossible,” he says, placing the softest kiss across my knuckles. “I’ll bet that you’ll make an amazing mother. Look, this isn’t something that has to happen right now, though. We have forever to determine if we want kids.”

When it comes to spending forever with someone, Wes is ideal. In a strange fucked up sort of way, that is. Even though he started out as a stalker, he is so much more than that now. I trusted him with my body, and all he’s done is treat it with love and devotion. He cares about my mental well-being, wanting to make sure my abusive father never hurts me again. Why wouldn’t I want to spend forever with him?

“Ask me again.” I whisper.

Wes’s eyes widen, the smile creeping across his face says it all. “Yeah?” He climbs off the bed and gets down on both of his knees. I scoot myself to the edge of the bed. Wes spreads my thighs so he can situate himself between them. My heart is on fire for this man, on his knees in front of me. “Layne Murphy, I know this is fast and we still have so much to learn about each other, but we can do all of that and more over time. Will you make me the happiest man in existence and marry me?”

I nod, the tears already forming in my eyes. Wes shuffles to his bedside table to grab a piece of rope. Then he comes back between my legs grasping my hand with his free one. He wraps our hands with the rope.

“I didn’t write these, but it’s a long-standing tradition in my family to recite them. My parents immigrated here from Scotland with me when I was two, so these are traditional Celtic vows. Let’s see if I remember them correctly.”

If he doesn’t I know them. Being Irish it’s kind of a thing in our culture.

Wes takes my hand in his, and begins, “You cannot possess me, for I belong to myself. But while we both wish it, I give you that which is mine to give. You cannot command me, for I am a free person, but I shall serve you in those ways you require, and the honeycomb will taste sweeter coming from my hand. I pledge that yours will be the name I cry aloud in the night and the eyes into which I smile in the morning. I pledge to you the first bite of my meat and the first drink from my cup. I pledge to you my living and my dying, each equally in your care. I shall be a shield for your back and you for mine. I shall not slander you, nor you me, honoring you above all others, and when we quarrel we shall do so in private and tell no strangers our grievances. This is my wedding vow to you: Our love is never-ending, and we will remain forever equals in our marriage.”

Wes leans over and snatches up his pants, rummaging in his pocket. He produces a small black box and stays down on both knees, not just the traditional one knee. “Is that a yes? I need to hear the words, Ma Petite Mort.”

When the fuck did he have time to get a ring?

My body propels forward and our lips connect, kissing him with such a burning passion.

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