Page 86 of A Shattered Kingdom of Steel

Gods-damn me, I swear that’s love I see there.

“I’ve always admired you, you know,” Asheros finally admits. His mouth relaxes, and his delicately calculated mask falls completely, letting me see his true self underneath. “Ever since the first time I saw you. It was my first time at High Keep. I was attending my first council meeting with my father. I was so unsure of myself at the time—I didn’t know who I was, or what kind of male I wanted to be.”

Gods, he’s only just begun, but I already ache to hold him.

He pauses, lips tugged upward into the hint of a smile. “And then we passed the training grounds. You were everything I wasn’t, everything I wished I could be. Unafraid. Resilient. Stronger than I could ever be.” His thumbs continue to brush my hands, the movement mindless. “You were surrounded by your peers, sparring with another trainee. I watched him strike you down, once, twice, three times.”

His stare doesn’t waver. Neither does his voice.

“You were battered and broken. But still, you rose to your feet with that determined look on your face—that look I’ve come to love more than anything in the gods-damned world. Every single time. And even though you lost that match, you walked away from the fight grinning like it was you who emerged victorious.”

Emotion gathers in my chest, but this time, the tears that come aren’t from fear, or sadness. It’s joy. The kind that comes from being seen, truly seen, and accepted for the person that you are.

“Even after you rose through the ranks, and became Captain of the High King’s Guard, you never lost that spirit.” The tenderness in Asheros’s voice nearly brings me to my knees. “You and those singing blades, the blades you are completely one with, the blades that are an extension of yourself. You can do anything and everything. No male, fear, or even the gods themselves can ever stand in your way.”

Letting my defenses fall, I let go of the feelings I try to contain. I let my walls fall. Let the tears flow from my eyes. Let the cage surrounding my heart disintegrate.

Because I’m with a male who makes me feel so safe. So protected.

So loved.

Touching his palm to my cheek, he caresses my face with his thumb. “So no, my Bladesinger. I have absolutely no doubts when it comes to following you.”

The corner of my mouth perks up. “None at all?”

“None at all,” he repeats, his words filled with promise. “There is no place in this realm I wouldn’t follow you into. Even in death.”

Throwing my arms around him, I bring my mouth to his. The salt of my tears mixes with the taste of him, but there is nothing in the gods-damned world that could tear my lips from his. He envelops me in his arms, the warmth of his body surrounding mine.

I’ve never needed anyone the way I need this male.

He is mine.

All mine.

Body and soul.

Chapter Twenty-Four

Morning comes much quicker than I’d like.

But then again, I’ve never been good at delaying the inevitable. Knowing that something will cause me discomfort has always made me run toward it headfirst. If only to be done with it sooner. So when dawn comes, I’m the first one up and dressed. Savell and Asheros are next, then Kheldryn, with Gryska and Ronan being the last to rub the sleep from their eyes.

Before we depart, Orim prepares a mouth-watering spread. Poached eggs, seared ham, buttered toast. There’s enough to feed a whole squadron of the Guard.

We huddle around Arella’s small table with Asheros, Savell, Ronan, and I standing as we eat. I let the flavors sit on my tongue, chewing slowly. Thoughtfully. This may be our last hot meal for gods know how long.

I’d rather not think about it.

“Eat up,” Orim says, using the spoon to gesture to the food. Glancing at Arella, he adds, “We’re leaving today as well.”

“Good.” Asheros nods, swallowing a bite of toast. “The sooner you two arrive at your family manor, the better.”

Orim narrows his eyes, tightness playing at his jaw. “Agreed.”

Asheros is silent for a moment. All eyes watch him, waiting for him to speak.

And he does.

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