Page 107 of A Broken Throne of Bronze

No, I want to shout. I want to barge in and tell him that he’s wrong, that I’m not in love with anyone else. Not anymore. But I find myself frozen, my feet fixed to the floor.

“Who is he?” Myrdin asks quietly. There’s a knowing edge to his voice.

“The prisoner.”

“The one—”

“Yes.”

There’s silence for a moment. And then Myrdin breaks it. “I see.”

Someone releases a long exhale.

“I want to hurt him.” Viridian’s voice is barely above a whisper. “I want to beat him until my jealousy has had its fill of violence.”

“Viridian,” Myrdin warns.

“But I won’t. Because she cares for him. And I—” Viridian stops abruptly. “I care about her. More than I know I should.”

“There is nothing wrong with caring for your betrothed, cousin.”

“Oh, but I care for her too much, you see. I would worship her, if she’d allow it. I would fall to my knees at her feet and if she commanded that I burn the whole realm to the ground for her, I would. And then I would follow her into hell, gladly.”

A heavy silence follows.

“You know what this means,” Myrdin says at last. “Have you told her?”

“No. Only once, when she was too drunk to remember.” A pause. “How can I?”

“You must tell her, Viridian. She has a right to know.”

“She doesn’t want this. She doesn’t want me.” The last phrase is so full of anguish that I lean forward, holding my hand over my heart.

I stagger away from the door.

He thinks I don’t want him.

He still thinks I want to leave.

After how much we’ve grown, after how close we were, he still sees me the way he did before. As the untrusting human, who could never love him. Who could never rule proudly at his side.

Stepping farther back, I turn and start down the hallway.

I need to get away. To go somewhere else. Anywhere but here.

My bedchamber is too close. Especially knowing that he’s on the other side. And with his fae hearing, he’ll know I’m there, too.

My feet carry me downstairs and through the double doors that lead to the stables. I don’t stop, continuing until I reach the grounds. When I’m finally out in the open, I pick up my skirts and break into a run.

Viridian’s words replay in my mind. Over, and over, and over.

“She doesn’t want this. She doesn’t want me.”

Oh, but I do. I do want him. Too much.

But part of me is still afraid and wants to return to my old life. The one that had Loren.

It’s as if they both represent one image of what could be. Loren, my common life in the Gold Court. The one without adventure.

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