Page 34 of Their War

Brannoc eyed me warily. “I may have told them that you needed a moment to yourself.” His hand went to the back of his neck as he shifted from foot to foot. His nervousness uncharacteristic.

Not sure how to feel about that little tidbit of information, I filed it away for later. “So, how does this whole smokey thing work? Is there anything I need to do?” I waved my hands at him to indicate my meaning.

He chuckled at my antics. “No. Just hold on. As long as we're touching, you'll come with me.”

“Okay.” For some reason, my nerves were lighting up, unsure of how to go about this whole thing. It wasn't just the thought of what it would feel like as a smoke figure, but more of what it would feel like pressed against him as we traveled in such a way. He moved closer, peering down at me with his dark eyes, which seemed to darken even more as his arm encircled my waist, pulling me tight up against him.

Heat rushed through me at the connection, and a small gasp escaped me. He dipped his head, his normal bravado back as he neared my ear, causing my breath to get lodged in my throat. “Hold on.” With that brief warning the smoke enveloped us. My limbs lost all sensation of weight. There's a moment at the top of a roller coaster or a hill when you transition from going up to going down. A moment where your stomach rolls at the weightlessness but in the best way possible.

Being consumed by his smoke was that, but instead of the feeling fading almost instantaneously, it lasted. I could still move my arms and body if I wanted, but yet they were still smoke, insubstantial as he moved us quickly from our hideout to the Cashel Rí.

As we neared our destination, we slowed enough that my eyes could focus on details again instead of the steady blur that had surrounded us before. We passed people who were simply rushing through their days like normal, each of them on a mission, set in completing some task that had been assigned to them. Even so, there was a tension in the air that hadn't been there before. It was evident in the taut lines of their bodies, the harried steps, the darting eyes alert for danger.

It seemed everyone was affected by the recent changes. That after the arrest of Master Jude, no one was safe from the Queen's wrath. An air of change blew through us all, indicating what was to come and hinting at the precipice we were all standing on. The one that would soon decide which way Avalon would go depending on which side won. There was fear that tinged the currents, coming from everyone we passed, as if they were simply hoping that if they just went about their tasks like normal, they could pretend nothing was happening. Despite going about their routines, they couldn't quite shake the knowledge that Avalon would never be the same. Fear of the uncertain future tinted them all with an almost sticky aura.

I glanced up at Brannoc, unsure if this was something he saw all the time or if this was simply my own imagination running wild. Our eyes met, and without saying anything, he simply nodded once, as if sensing my question before I could ask it.

Following his lead, I stayed silent, unsure if people could still hear us in this form or not. As we darted from shadow to shadow, remaining hidden in the darkness, we continued toward the castle. Passing through the main doors and down hallways, I couldn't help the thought that there were a lot of shadows, even in the bright early sun and light that lit up the halls. It seemed that no matter how hard people tried, we could never quite rid ourselves of the darkness that clung to everything.

Like the darkness that seemed to cling to my soul, that I fought for years to tamp down and tame, to ignore when it seemed impossible to push away. The gloom that inevitably found me in my moments of weakness, nearly consuming me until I stumbled upon an outlet, my own fear of that darkness keeping me from building relationships.

However, since meeting Brannoc, I wondered what it would be like to embrace the darkness like he had. Darkness didn't simply mean evil, because Brannoc, who seemed to be all things dark, wasn't evil. His actions had been steady and sound, providing us with safety and shelter when we needed it. Wrapping us up in his shadows when we had nowhere else to go.

Night didn't necessarily mean death, it didn't mean cold or uncaring. Oftentimes, it could represent knowledge hidden from us, a warm place to cuddle up to our loved ones, a regathering of people from where they had wandered during the day, and a time to rest and recover safely.

While darkness was all of these things, it didn't mean that it needed to be feared like so many people did. Like I was guilty of, too weak to face my own fears. It simply was what it was. It didn't pretend to be anything else. Maybe, I could learn how to embrace that darkness within myself. And I didn't have to do that alone anymore. My men would be steady by my side as I learned to integrate that part into myself, learned to find that balance that I needed. Because without the night, there could be no day. Both necessary for life and everything that it entailed.

It took me a moment to realize we had stopped, lost to my musings, in a room that was near barren, except for a plain wooden bed alongside one wall, a small wardrobe in one corner and a chair opposite. I glanced at Brannoc in question to find an amused look on his face, his dark eyes sparkling with emotion. I briefly wondered if he could sense the direction of my thoughts, connected to him like this, but dismissed it, no longer caring if he could or not.

It wasn't as if I had been thinking about the firm muscles that were pressed against me; the lean, strong lines of his body were warm as he held me close. Although now, I clearly was thinking about it and couldn't help the spark of desire that ran through me. I fought a blush as I tried to keep my hands from exploring those hard muscles under my fingertips, hoping desperately he couldn't actually sense the direction my thoughts had taken. I fought the urge to look up at him and studied the room again. My mind wandered to why we were here in this room. I knew our sole purpose was to find Juniper, to gather information, but she clearly wasn't here.

Unsure, I waited while trying to ignore Brannoc’s body, something I seemed to be poor at. The need to do something, anything, like an itch under my skin. I wanted to pace, to fidget, to fill the silence, but I didn't dare do any of the above, too afraid that I'd ruin the secrecy. Finally, it got the better of me and I looked at Brannoc, opening my mouth to ask why we were here, but he silenced me with a quiet laugh, mouthing, “Just wait.” He nodded at the door.

As if he had summoned her, the door swung open, revealing Juniper in her plain, dark green dress that seemed to be common among the staff. She seemed to be rattled, her hands shaking as she closed the door and leaned back against it. My brow furrowed in concern as we watched her, her eyes closed while she put herself back together. What could have her so rattled? I imagined the Queen wasn't very happy that Genevieve couldn't be crowned, never mind that it didn't seem to be possible. Not since I had already been Chosen by Avalonia.

When she finally opened her eyes, they went straight to where we were hiding in the shadows as if she'd known we were there all along. Instead of saying anything, she opened her door again, peeking at both sides along the hall. Satisfied, she shut her door again, crossing her arms and cocking out a hip. “What is it you want now, Raven?” Her eyes indicated that she wasn't necessarily delighted that he was here, but she wasn't immediately shutting him out either.

I felt the shadows pull back, my body returning from the weightlessness, suddenly heavier than I had predicted. I stumbled slightly but Brannoc's arm around my waist held me firm.

Juniper's eyes widened. “You shouldn't be here. Stupid girl, the whole land is looking for you.”

“And yet, here I am,” I replied, irritated with her tone.

“What could possibly bring you back here? There's nothing for you here anymore. You should run, now,” she whispered harshly.

Stepping forward and away from the warmth of Brannoc's embrace, I decided to lay it all out for her. “Master Jude has been imprisoned. I can't let that stand.”

“And if you get caught, it will all have been for nothing.”

“I can't walk away from family. The only family I've found here. I won't let that bitch take him from me,” I said firmly, letting her know that her chastisements wouldn't budge me. The decision had been made, and the only thing for her to do at this point would be to help me.

Her eyes widened again with an intake of breath. She stepped toward me, studying me closely. “How can that be?”

Confused, I tilted my head, looking back at Brannoc for direction. He simply nodded again, encouraging me to keep going. Turning back to her, I asked the question we'd come here for. “Will you help us break him out of prison?”

As if she hadn't heard my question, she murmured to herself before meeting my eyes. “Jude is your grandfather?”

“That's what he said.” My confusion grew, unsure of why she was so shocked by this revelation.

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