Page 40 of Their War

“I'm just telling the truth. She should know now.”

I laughed at Callum's words, the tone harsh even to my own ears. “Oh, I'm figuring it all out now.” I moved until I was right in front of Callum, my finger poking into his chest with my next words. “You obviously don't know me, asshole. I'll rescue my grandfather, with or without your help. It would be easier if you did, but I don't need you. I don't need any of you.”

Pushing back from him, I distanced myself from them physically and mentally, crossing my arms over my chest. “When are you supposed to meet Gorn's contact?” I asked Arryn.

He glanced to the other guys. “He's supposed to make contact with us.”

Nodding, I considered this information. “I want to go with you to meet him.” At their hesitation, I sighed, rolling my eyes. “Take me with you to meet this contact, and I'll consider staying behind on the actual rescue mission.”

As if unsure about whether I was telling the truth or not, Arryn considered me, the guys carrying on an unspoken conversation while they tried to figure out if they could trust me. Good. At least they knew that much about me. I had no intention of staying behind. I'd already considered it and discarded the idea like the trash it was.

“Okay,” Arryn said, still hesitant and unsure.

“Perfect,” I said. “Now, I'm going to rest until this contact finds us. Y'all should rest, too. I'll want you guys to move as quickly as possible after we get what we need from this contact.”

“Princess...” Lennox pleaded with me again as I turned my back on them and stormed to my room.

“Let her go, Lennox. She'll realize soon enough that we're right.” Callum's words reached me just before I closed the door.

Tears of anger burned my eyes. I didn't know how, but I'd find a way to follow them. I just needed the information from the contact first. I'd make them think that I was compliant, that I would stay behind willingly if it ensured that they took me to meet this mysterious informant.

My resolve hardened to what I'd need to do. I didn't like being anything other than who I was, but to do what needed to be done, I'd do whatever I had to. I'd rescue this land from the Bitch Queen, but now, I couldn't stay with people who didn't love me for me. I'd have to return to Earth as soon as things stabilized. If they wanted to rule this land, they could have it. I wanted nothing more from them or this realm.

Chapter Twenty Three: Rhowyn

A soft knock on the door stirred me from my sleep. My first instinct was an eagerness to see Baer, recognizing him through the bond until I remembered our argument. I slammed the wall down in my heart, blocking them from the bond and my emotions, wondering how I could have been so blind. How had we gone from building something so deep to where we were now?

Sitting up, I prepared myself to see him. “Come in,” I said coldly, hoping that very little emotion entered my words.

The door opened slowly, Baer peeking his head around the frame to eye me before pushing the door wide. Leaving the door open, he walked toward me.

Not liking the fact that he towered over me from my position on the bed, I stood. “What do you want?” Shit, there was more anger in that than I'd wanted.

“I get that you're mad,” Baer started.

“Really?! What gave it away?” I snarked.

He winced at my sarcasm, rubbing a hand to his chest. “Please don't shut us out.” His eyes pleaded with me. I wanted to let him in again, to let him hold me in the safety his arms provided, but I reminded myself that I shouldn't want someone who didn't want me. He wanted a different version of me, someone I could never be or live up to.

“Why shouldn't I?”

“Because all we want is what's best for you,” he started, but I cut him off before he could say more.

“What you want is not something I can give you. What you want is not who I am,” I told him in as simple of terms as I could manage.

“Rhowyn, why wouldn't I want to protect the woman I've come to love? Why wouldn't I want to keep her safe? You're asking us to forget our instincts and to put you in a knowingly dangerous situation. You said it yourself; this is most likely a trap.”

I laughed. “How can you say that?” I asked him, unable to look at him anymore, turning to pace the room instead. “You can't love someone you don't know.”

“What do you mean? We do know you.”

“No. You don't. Because if you did know me, then there's no way you could possibly think I'd ever go along with staying behind. That there's no way I'd ever let the people I care about go off alone into that danger without me.” I paused to look at him. “So, no, Baer, you don't know me, so you can't possibly expect me to believe that you love me.”

He sighed, running his hands through his hair. “Just because I know that you don't like this idea doesn't mean I can't try to convince you to at least be safe. To consider us in this and how we feel about the whole thing.”

“Look, I get it. You don't like the idea of me getting hurt. Can't you see how hypocritical it is that you're asking me to let any of you go into that same situation? You think I want any of you getting hurt? It's me she wants. It's me who has to bear the responsibility if any of you are harmed as a result of this.

“I wish I could say I could just leave Jude behind, but I can't. He's my only family, and I wouldn't be able to live with myself if I didn't help him. He's only in this mess because of me. That's why I can't just sit here doing nothing while asking y'all to take that risk. I can't ask any of you to do what I'm not willing to do.”

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