Page 31 of Their War

“I don’t care. I’ll just make sure I’m not caught,” I told him, crossing my arms over my chest and cocking out a hip, daring him to push me on this. I wouldn’t budge.

Baer sidled up next to me, a pleading look in his eyes. “Think about this, Killer. You’re more valuable than any of us, and we can’t risk losing you.” He paused, but when I went to protest again, he continued, “I can’t handle losing you again. Please don’t ask me to risk you like that.”

I softened to him and his pleas instantly, hugging him. As much as I wanted to give him this, I couldn’t. I had never been the type to walk away from someone in need, and I never would be. This was something he would need to accept about me. Not only that, but the reverse of their claims was also true for me.

“And what about me? How can you ask me to risk you guys? If any one of you is taken, what will I do then?” I asked them, meeting all of their eyes, begging them to see the truth. “I want to give you what you’re asking of me, but it’s not in my nature. I need to be there to protect the people I care for.”

I took Baer’s hands in mine, meeting his eyes. “This is new for me. I’ve never had people around me that care for me, that want me to succeed. I’ll be damned if I let that bitch take even more from me. Avalonia chose me because I’m a fighter. Because I won’t just sit on the sidelines letting you guys do all the dirty work. That’s not the kind of leader I want to be.”

I could feel them starting to capitulate to me, softening and understanding my stance. While I hoped they would agree to this, I didn’t need them to. I would be going whether they liked it or not. I smiled saucily, trying to ease the tension. “Besides, even if you left me here alone, I’d be forced to follow. Would you rather me out there alone or with the protection of my consorts?”

“Don’t do that,” Callum snapped at me. “Don’t make light of this.”

“I’m not. I’m simply telling you how it is and how this will go,” I snapped back. Neither of us were willing to move on this issue. I didn’t blame him. If I were in his shoes, I would probably feel the same way. But I wasn’t some damsel that needed their constant sheltering. I was powerful and capable in my own right.

“Fine,” Arryn said with a weighted sigh, his shoulders slumped as if the world sat on them, clearly not happy with this decision. “If you go, you listen to what we have to say. We know the magic better than you and are better prepared.”

I nodded. “I can do that,” I told him eagerly, happy that they were getting on board with me going.

“We need more information before we can do anything else,” he said, standing and starting to pace with his hands clasped together behind his back. I could see the wheels turning in his mind.

“I don’t want to wait, but I can’t argue that we need information,” I told him honestly. “However, if we don’t get those answers soon, I will go in there anyway. I can only imagine what she’s doing to him. I at least had the protection of being a Chosen. He has nothing keeping her at bay. So whatever information you need, we need to gather it quickly.”

He sighed out, his thumb and forefinger pinching his nose. "I've got some contacts in the city that might be able to help us. Lennox and I can go check in with them." He turned to Brannoc. "When you were checking on Rhowyn, you said that Juniper was helpful?"

Brannoc nodded. "She indicated that she would be willing to help."

"Good." Arryn said with a nod of confirmation. "You can go see what information she might have for us. I'm not certain I can trust my connections in the castle. Just make sure not to give anything away. While I'd love to simply trust her, right now we can't take any chances."

Callum spoke up. "Baer and I can check around the city as well. I'm sure there's plenty of help that will be willing to talk once they've been plied with enough drink. Since we're less likely to be recognized, we can do this relatively safely."

"Same goes for you two. Don't take any risks. Breaking one person out of prison will be hard enough as it is. We don't want to be working two men short and three times the amount to rescue," Arryn instructed, always the one we depended on. I needed to find a way to show him my thanks and help take some of the burden he was carrying.

Baer laughed, patting Callum on the shoulder. "If we get into any trouble, we'll just let big guy here wolf out. Not many fae see that anymore, and I'm sure it'll give us the chance to get away. Not that we'll be needing to do any of that."

Everyone smiled at Baer's attempt to lighten the mood, although there wasn’t much to laugh about at the moment. Hating what I was about to do, I chimed in, "And what about me? I've already said I won't be sitting this out and that includes any reconnaissance we're doing."

My words had the expected outcome. Callum growled out loud as he ground his teeth, while the rest stiffened. My temper flared. "Surely you didn't think I wouldn't notice that you just left me out of these instructions."

Arryn sighed, displeased about me forcing the issue. "I can understand your need to be there for the rescue, but I had hoped you would let us get the information."

I closed the distance between us, my finger jabbing into his chest. "At no point will I ever just sit back and let y'all handle everything for me. You better get used to it now, or you'll be in for a world of disappointment."

He wrapped his hand around the finger currently poking into his chest, which was hard as a rock. "And I will never stop trying to protect you, even if that means from yourself." Taking a small step forward until his chest was brushing mine, he leaned down. "I will always do what I think is best for you, my Chosen." He ran his nose along my neck, causing my head to tilt of its own accord, before whispering into my ear. "And I have no problem asking for your forgiveness later. At which point, I will take great pleasure in reminding you of what it's like to do as I say."

My thighs squeezed together with that promise, but I knew I had won this small battle. "And later, I will be sure to let you take control, but on this, I won't be budging. I'm going to help."

I watched as his eyes flashed with hunger and desire, but instead of acting on it, he stepped back from me. My body cried out at the loss of his warmth, but I kept myself from pulling him back to me. We had bigger things to worry about right now.

"Brannoc, can you take Rhowyn with you? Your talents will be useful in getting her out of danger quickly should you run into any trouble."

"Easily," he said simply.

"Now that that's settled, let's get ready to head out. I expect everyone back here in three hours. If you're longer, we'll assume something happened, and we’ll need to plan a new rescue mission," Arryn said definitively, our cue to get ready for the upcoming tasks we had been assigned.

We all departed for our rooms without another word. I went back to the room I had originally woken in, prepared to put back on the leather pants and top I had on during the final trial, only to realize that they were not much more than tatters, covered in blood and dirt.

Looking at them now, it was hard to reconcile that all that blood had come from me, and that I’d been extremely close to losing everything. I picked up the top, my hands shaking as I contemplated what would have happened if these men hadn't gotten to me in time. I dropped the top back onto the floor, needing to push back the emotions that were currently trying to choke me. Sitting down on the bed, I threaded my hands through my hair, taking a deep breath to steady myself.

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