Page 17 of Their Chosen

“Now, try to remain open minded because the fae don't see relationships like humans do. Many have multiple partners or mates of varying genders. The fae are all very sexual beings, unlike humans who find pride in repressing that side of themselves. The fae enjoy touch and sensual experiences since their senses are heightened by the magic of the land.”

I tried not to blanch or be a prude about it all, but I hadn't enjoyed that side of myself in a while. To me, it was too much vulnerability, too unstable, to allow another person in like that. They only had the power to hurt you if you let them in. And since everyone I had ever dared to let in had hurt me, I just quit letting anyone in at all. Just another reason why I’d never been in a relationship.

I hadn't been nervous before, but the more I learned, the more anxiety bubbled up. As if sensing my discomfort and unease, my mom stopped and walked over to me, placing her hand on my cheek. I didn't say anything, but the look in her eyes said she knew and understood anyway. There was a deep sorrow in her gaze which reflected my own. “I never wanted this life for you. I had so many other plans, but it seems the fates had other ideas. For that, baby, I'm sorry. If I could have changed it, I would have. Neither of us asked for this, yet here we are. If nothing else, I've learned that it's no use fighting the fates. They do with us as they will. All we can do is try to make the best out of what they give us.”

I nodded while swallowing back the tears that threatened to spill over as what I was about to face finally started to become real. Before, I could pretend it was just a dream or that it was happening to someone else. Now, it was all closing in on me too quickly. Everything was changing before I could catch up, even if I didn't want it to. Knowing that there was nothing I could do about it yet, already feeling a restless pull inside myself, I changed the subject. “Are these what I should bring?” I asked, eyeing a few choices she'd laid out.

Stepping back from me, she nodded. “Yes. I figure there's something that can fit into any season, a jacket in case it's winter, and jeans because the terrain is rough no matter where you go. If everything hasn't drastically changed, the Queen should provide you with clothes and everything else you'll need while at court during the trials.”

“Sounds good to me, though I don't plan on staying long enough to need a new wardrobe,” I responded, getting up to start folding the clothes to put into my gym bag that I’d emptied earlier. Heading to the bathroom, I grabbed my toiletries, tossing them in before picking out underwear.

“Rhowyn, I want to caution you to not get your hopes up for a fast trip. You'll only be released from the trials should the land wish it,” my mother warned me, now sitting on my bed as she watched me move about restlessly.

“I get it, Mom. However, I can be persuasive when I want to be and I'm pretty good at getting out of tough spots,” I assured her, confident that I was telling the truth.

“I know, baby.” She eyed me thoughtfully as I kept packing. “Can I ask one favor from you, though? I know I haven't really earned that right, but will you at least keep an open mind while you're there? It is your home and heritage after all, and you may find you like it there.”

“You can always ask anything of me, Mom. I honestly don't think that I'll enjoy it, not with everything I have here waiting for me, but I promise I'll keep an open mind.” She nodded, satisfied with that answer, and drew me into a hug, her still taller but leaner frame wrapping around me. Now this, I had missed. And suddenly, I found myself not wanting to go alone.

“Why don't you come with me, Mom? The fae seemed eager to get me to come back with them, so I'm positive I can get them to agree to letting you come, too.” I held her shoulders as I asked her, but I knew the answer when her eyes started to glisten, and her voice wavered.

“I wish I could. More than you could ever know, but it's not safe for me there. It's only slightly safer for you because no one knows you. The only reason I'm letting you go is because neither of us has a choice. The land has chosen, and it won't be denied your return. But listen to me now, Rhowyn. You mustn’t tell anyone about me or who your mother is. Your life depends on this. I thought we might have a little more time, but they were much quicker at finding you than I’d expected.”

Concerned, I nodded. “I won't. No one knows who we are, and I'll make sure it stays that way.”

She hugged me again. “Good. You'll find out why it has to be this way soon enough.”

Chapter Nine: Rhowyn

It was still dark outside as I paced back and forth with my bag over my shoulder, my eyes darting around nervously. I was on edge as I waited on the dark sidewalk for them to arrive. My sleep-deprived state had me jumping at every sound and shadow. Despite my fear and anxiety, a part of me I didn't want to acknowledge was excited about leaving today. I was eager to explore a new world but still not fully sure if I believed it really existed. If nothing else, I was anxious to find out if I was crazy or not.

I caught sight of headlights approaching, and I paused, watching them. Instead of slowing down, they continued past me. Pulling my phone out, I checked the time 5:45 a.m. Since I hadn’t been able to sleep, I had left the apartment early, needing to move. Pacing again, I allowed my thoughts to wander to last night with my mom. Her warnings sat heavily on my shoulders, and I was grateful I hadn't let anything slip while talking with Baer yesterday. I knew that whatever happened in the next couple of hours or days, vigilance wasn't an option if I wanted to keep us both safe.

I was thankful I had years of training to rely on, knowing it wouldn’t be the last time I would be grateful for the unwanted skills I’d learned out of necessity. If I wanted to make it back, it would take all of those hard-won skills to make it happen. Not coming back wasn't an option because I absolutely refused to abandon my students without an explanation like so many had done to me. The guilt would consume me if I failed to keep my word. For many of them, I was their only constant, and while I couldn’t rescue them all from their lives, I could teach them how to rescue themselves. The only person they would ever need was themselves. But until they were ready to stand on their own, they needed my support, understanding, and strength to hold them up.

The sun was starting to make its presence known now, the sky lightening from black to gray. A quick glance at my phone told me it was six. They’d be here any minute. As soon as that thought crossed my mind, I saw another set of headlights turn the corner to head in my direction. The car slowed, and I walked closer to the curb, certain it was them. The engine stayed running as the car pulled over to park. Unable to see through the dark windows because of a glare from the streetlight, I kept on the balls of my feet, holding my ground until I was completely certain it was them.

The driver's side door opened, and Baer stood with one leg out and one still in the car, both elbows resting on the door and roof. “Well, Killer, are you ready?” he asked with obvious excitement on his smiling face.

I couldn't help myself from smiling back. “Pop the trunk, and I'll throw my bag in there.” The trunk clicked before it sprang open slightly. I caught sight of supple leather bags in the back, and I threw my own cheap one alongside them before I closed the trunk firmly.

Baer was still standing, watching me. “You can ride up front with me. We'll let Arryn and Lennox share the back seat.” He winked at me, his innuendo clear.

Laughing, I climbed into the front seat. Once we’d buckled up, I looked over my shoulder and at least acknowledged the two men squished into the back seat with a nod.

“So, how long is this drive going to be? I'm starving and would like to eat soon if that's okay?” I asked Baer as he pulled back onto the road.

His eyes flicked to mine quickly before turning back to the road. “It should only take us a couple of hours before we’re able to cross over. Wanna grab something to eat while we drive?”

“That sounds amazing. Thanks.”

He nodded. “Where would you like to stop?”

“A breakfast burrito sounds great.”

He laughed. “A woman who knows what she wants. How refreshing.” Again, he winked, but this time, I blushed slightly at the compliment. At least, I thought it had been. I chose to take it as one anyway.

The car settled into silence as Baer steered us towards our destination without any hesitation. As the silence grew, I started to feel the awkwardness increase as well. Finally, it became unbearable, so I asked, “Once we cross over, how long will it take us to get to the Tír Na Síoraí?”