Page 22 of I Still Love You

Monica rolls her chartreuse green eyes. “Here we go. Once you get her going, there’s no stopping her,” she warns, but she forgets that I work the day shift with Sierra, that I don’t already know she won’t hush until she gets her opinion out.

I avert my gaze by digging through my bag for my keys. “She hasn’t shut up about Luke and me since she found out.”

“Because you two are perfect for each other!” Sierra voices. “Every time I bring him up, you look like you just ate a sour patch kid and never got to the sweet side. It’s weird, and I know things are rocky, but if anyone can break through it, it’s you.”

Do I really take on that appearance? Do I cringe when she says his name? Do I worry my lips or throw up a look of disgust? I honestly thought I was putting up a good front, but maybe it’s not as believable as I thought. And why should it be? What we have isn’t real. Not anymore.

“Well,” Monica starts, heading toward the doorway. “If it means anything, I think it would be good for you to go. With or without Luke.” She crosses the break room and wraps me in a hug. “I know I said it already, but I’m really glad you’re back. Missed you more than I realized I would.” She sticks her tongue out, giving me a glimpse of her tongue ring. It glistens in the light before sucking back into her mouth. “I have to get to work. If Mildred hears I stayed in here to gossip with you two, she’ll be up my ass.”

“Good luck with Mr. Phillips,” Sierra tells her. “He’s a handsy little shit. Grabbed my ass two times.”

Monica tosses her a thumbs up as she heads out the door. Sierra doesn’t give me a second to breathe after Monica vanishes without starting in again.

“You have to come. The farmer’s market in the square only happens once a month, and there are always so many cute jewelry stands, tons of food, and street artists always take over the benches. You don’t know what art is until you see what some of them can do.”

I swing the strap of my bag over my shoulder before gathering my Tupperware containers from the fridge. “It sounds like a lot of fun, Sierra. I just don’t know…”

She sighs in defeat, and I feel it in my bones. This isn’t what I visualized when I took this job. I didn’t foresee bumping into Luke and never expected I’d lie about being back with him to my closest friends.

This isn’t okay.

None of it is.

I need to squash it before it gets worse. Before the already consuming guilt weighs me down more than it already is. “Sierra—”

“No,” she interrupts. “Listen, I know I’m a bit much, but you literally have love at your fingertips, and I also want you to enjoy yourself! It might not sound like a good time, but it is. And I wanted to include you in that. Luke, too.” She blows out a defeated breath. “Ultimately, Layla, I just want you happy, so if you don’t want to come, it’s okay. I understand.”

I can’t believe I’m about to agree to this. Nor am I okay with what comes out of my mouth next. “I’ll ask him.”

Her eyes brighten. It’s almost enough to make it worth the anguish and hassle of having yet another conversation with the man who rips my insides apart just thinking about him. Though, I think it has more to do with what I did and how I left him that causes the reaction. “Really?”

He’s going to say no, and I’ll have to come back to Sierra and let her down, but at least this gets me off the hook for the time being. For her sake, I pretend I’m not already aware of that. My smile is tight when I look at her. “Sure.”

She grabs her things from her locker in a hurry and squeals. “He’s totally going to say yes. Honestly, who could say no to you?”

Luke, that’s who.

The sunshine breaking through the wispy clouds warms me when Sierra and I exit the side employee entrance. Off to the side and away from the main E.R. doors, it’s hidden between the sports therapy building where Luke works and the rest of the hospital. Knowing he can peek out of half the windows in his office building and see me makes me edgy and feel as if he is watching me whenever I come and go. I’d use patient parking, but I’m not willing to sacrifice my close parking spot because of him.

Sierra smiles next to me. “See you tomorrow. Can’t wait to hear that you’ll be joining us on Saturday.” The hopefulness in her voice makes me twinge with discomfort and has me hoping she won’t take it so hard when I tell her we won’t be joining her. She wiggles her brows at me, the micro-bladed curves dancing against the sunny day, and her gaze immediately shifts over my shoulder. “Man candy is approaching. Quickly, too.”

My eyes flutter shut, and I internally brace for whatever Luke has in store. I don’t want Sierra to witness whatever is about to go down, so I lift a hand in goodbye and am thankful when she takes the hint, turns forward, and heads to her car.

I wait for Luke to cross the parking lot. When he finally falls in step next to me, his presence looms. Like the nerves that blossom before your first job interview, my stomach heaves upward, lurching like it’s on a loopty-loop rollercoaster.

“Hey.”

I scratch at my cheek out of awkwardness—because why is he here right now—and re-situate the strap of my bag on my shoulder as I head for my car. “Uh, hi.” I swallow my apprehension and force myself to fall back on my confidence and strength. “To what do I owe the pleasure this time?” I hit the fob on my keyring, unlocking the doors on my crossover, and hear Sierra zoom out of the parking lot.

“I talked to Mason,” he discloses, though I’m not sure why. “He says hi.”

I lower my brows and pull open my back door, shoving my bags in before turning to face him. “You’re here to tell me that you talked to your brother?”

He rolls his bottom lip into his mouth and tucks his hands into his work slacks. Every time I see him, he’s wearing a different colored polo, the fabric hugging his torso perfectly, and exactly how many shades does he have? “He thinks I’m being unfair to you.”

Ah, Mason, ever the kind one of the Sacks twins. Appreciation fills me, knowing that he might be getting on his brother’s case, even if it’s just to bring awareness to his actions.

“Do you think you’re being an ass?” I question with a curiosity thrumming through me. Has he finally realized how one-sided he’s been? Every one of his words are pesky thorns that prick into me. No matter how much he thinks I deserve them, I’m human, too.

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