Page 79 of I Choose You

Her eyes are a dark shade of hazel. The caramel in them is overbearing and deep. I resist the urge to reach out and tug her face closer to see them better.

If only I were good enough for her.

“I came to talk.”

“That’s what we did the last time you were here and look how that went.”

She steps toward me, lifting her hands like she wants to say something before dropping them to her sides. “Mason…” Sadness spirals in her voice, and it’s all I can take not to hug away her pain. “I didn’t come to argue.”

“Then why are you here? You told me I wasn’t worth your effort. If I’m not worth it, then why the hell did you get on a plane?”

She hoists her bag up on her shoulder, and it’s the first time I notice it. Did she come straight from the airport? I scan the bag before moving back to her face.

“I came here for you. Listen, I know I said things, but I’m here to say new things, and I know I can’t erase the pain I’ve caused, but I’m hoping these new words will override my old ones.” She takes a steady breath, dropping her bag to the floor. “You think you’re not worth the effort, but you are. My past blindsided me. My father’s inability to stay in my life blurred my vision. What I meant to say that day is that I’m afraid.” She glances down at the floor, and I cross my arms, leaning back against the fridge. “I’m terrified of being that little girl again. Being left behind and not important enough to stick around for. It’s why I don’t like letting people in or making promises. I projected the feelings he left me with onto you, which was wrong of me. I’m so sorry, Mason.” Her voice cracks from the sadness and guilt. “You didn’t deserve that. I’m sorry I was the one who made you think something as awful as being unworthy. It’s not the truth. The truth is…”

The brown in her eyes lightens when she stares at me. We’re two yards away from one another, but it feels like she’s in my face, wrapping her words around my neck and arms to hold me in place. She blinks. “The truth is that I should have taken you up on your offer. I couldn’t see past my insecurities and fears, but I can now.” She scratches her cheek and relaxes into her stance more. “I’m going to talk to someone, see a therapist. It’s important I don’t backtrack because you deserve better than what I’ve been able to give.” She shakes her head. “Sorry, I’m making it sound like we’re back together, and that’s not what I’m trying to say. I mean that…”

My brows push together as she rambles on. No matter how much I don’t want to think about how we ended, it’s kind of cute—her rambling.

“What I’m trying to say is that you are worth me working on myself for. I love you, Mason. I always have, really. It wasn’t until we started, you know, that I learned how much I can’t stand being away from you.”

I’m overwhelmed. She’s overwhelmed. This is hard for her to say. Traveling to Austin on her own couldn’t have been an easy feat but seeing her lessens the load on my chest. I’ve missed her so fucking much it’s ridiculous. Somehow, she thaws the iciness of my jaw and heart enough that I close the space between us and yank her to my chest.

She claws at my shirt, gripping onto me. When I can’t tolerate the bulkiness of her jacket, I push it off her arms and toss it on the counter. Shoving my nose into the crook of her neck, I breathe her in, appreciating the familiarity of it, of the lavender and rosemary. I bring my hand up and run my fingers into the hair at her nape and press my mouth against her neck.

I could never stay mad at her. She said hurtful things, but she recognized them, and it’s all I could have asked for. Well, that, and wanting her to be as into me as I am into her. “I can’t tell you how much I’ve missed you.”

Her hand slides along my back. “I know the feeling.”

I draw back to cradle her head in my hands. “Does this mean we’re done ignoring each other?”

She nods and scans my face. Her fingers curl into my shirt tighter, drawing it away from my neck. “I sure hope so.”

I look down at her lips. “And I can kiss you again?”

She smiles and blinks, looking at my chest before settling into my gaze again. “Yes, but I want to make sure you share your thoughts, too.”

I shake my head, my gaze still set on her. It doesn’t matter. Yeah, I felt like shit since that weekend, but she’s here now to tell her side of the story. I’m not a hard person to please. All I want out of my relationships is honesty. If she can give me that, then we’re golden. If she weren’t willing to try, she wouldn’t be here. Mackenzie acts out of the love she feels, not to manipulate situations. “It’s over and done with. You’re here now, and that’s all that matters to me, Kenz.”

Her hand comes to my stubbled cheeks, her fingers tracing along my scar. “I want you to know that I choose you. I don’t choose my past or the insecurities that have come from it. I want to prove that.” Her voice turns to a whisper. “Let me prove that to you.”

My gaze ricochets around her face, over her clear complexion and splattering of freckles. They go up and over the bridge of her nose, spread out over her cheeks. Her eyelashes, though longer, aren’t curled like they normally are, and her hair sits on top of her head in a messy collection. My fingers push her wild strands of hair behind her ears, my fingers brushing along the shell of them before moving to her lips. Plump and peeling from the dry weather back home, the pad of my thumb moves over her bottom lip. Ever so slowly, I pull it back, enjoying the spring as it settles back into place. “When you said those things to me…a piece of my soul left me. I wanted to say goodbye to you, Kenz, but I couldn’t.” I shut my eyes. “I was angry and upset, but also, I fucking love you. I couldn’t look at you and not see it back. I couldn’t.”

The promise of a lifetime flashes across her face when she peers up. “Love me, Mason. Love me and let me love you back.”

My mouth crashes into hers, brushing against her smooth, pink lips. I don’t waste time. I can’t. How many days have gone by without touching each other? We need to make up for lost time. Sliding my hands over her hips, they round to her back, gripping her ass before lifting her onto the counter. A small squeak erupts from her, but then she reaches for my face, holding onto our kiss as I set her down and unbutton her pants.

I pull away, only to move my mouth along her skin, starting at her cheek. I work to the side and bite down on her earlobe when I reach it, inducing a soft whimper from her that brings my dick to life. It strains against the denim of my slacks. I don’t bother readjusting myself in hopes they’ll be off of me soon when I move to drag her shirt over her head. Knowing what to expect, she reaches around and unclasps her bra in record timing. I grab onto the one-inch piece of fabric sewn between the cups, freeing her. It flies across the kitchen, and then my mouth is on her, my tongue swirling in circles over her soft, perky nipples.

Fucking hell.

I never want to miss this again. I want to celebrate her body every damn day of the week. Multiple times a day if she’ll allow it. She’s so stunning that it almost actually hurts for me to see.

My hand and tongue take turns moving along her body. Lightly, I nip at her skin, drawing the throaty moans from her I’ve grown to love. Each one amplifies my arousal, making me thicker. More blood rushes south, and my zipper bites into me.

“Lift up,” I tell her when my hands move to tug at her jeans. She must need this as much as I do because she quickly obliges. I’m quick to peel her jeans down her legs and yank them from her feet. I don’t bother with her panties. Luckily for me, they’re easy to tug to the side. “Lean back.”

She cups one of her exposed breasts and her head tips back as I spread her legs on either side of me. Kissing along her inner thigh, I race to my prize and pull her thin cotton panties to the side, craving her sweetness more when I see an uneven circle of moisture on them. She’s ready for me, and all it takes is loving her. If someone told me a year ago I would be in Austin with the woman of my dreams spread for me on my kitchen counter, I’d tell them to screw off. But man, am I overjoyed that this is my reality. Am I totally fucking fired up that I get to worship Mackenzie Jones like this? You fucking bet.

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