Page 76 of Untamed Protector

“And why don’t you just talk to her? Why are you hiding?”

“I’m not. I like to watch over her from a distance. She lives with her grandmother. Unfortunately, her mom, who you’ve met, only makes things worse.”

Lexi leans over me, wincing as she puts weight on her hurt hand. Her eyes follow the group out of school.

“Why do you think it’s your fault? And what did that woman mean about you paying your debts?”

“Jake, Iris’s father, was my only buddy at the orphanage. He was a couple of years younger, but from the day he came, he wouldn’t leave my side. He kept telling everyone he was my brother, and I didn’t mind. I mean… he was like my little shadow. But when I joined the Navy, I left him alone and defenseless. He was small and frail, but feisty and super smart. That’s probably why those illegal car racers ended up taking him in.”

“I still don’t get why this is your fault. What duty? You can’t be blamed for what others decide.”

“Why don’t we go home? I’ll tell you all about it on the way. Oh, and I need to take care of your hand when we get there.” Even though she’s a good listener, I didn’t expect it to be so hard to talk about my past with Lexi. I know I decided to open up, but I feel the need to take this slower.

“Who else knows about her?”

“Damien, Dominic, and Mike. He’s the one in charge of monitoring and watching over her. The rest of the team that guards her thinks she’s the daughter of an important client.”

“God, Gabriel. Why would you shut yourself out like this? I don’t get it. My father means the world to me. Every little girl needs a father. Why didn’t you stay in Iris’s life as a father figure? Why hide?”

“Because I don’t know how to be a father, just like I don’t know how to be a boyfriend. I couldn’t be there for a family other than providing for them financially. I failed as a friend to her father. All I know is how to be a soldier, and the only strong connections in my life are with other soldiers.”

Until you came into my life, I should add. I know she needs to hear it. Lexi’s questions echo in my head—the same ones I’ve been asking myself for years. With a deep breath, I start the car.

22

Gabriel

Lexi doesn’t seem satisfied with what I told her about Iris. I can tell by the way she purses her lips and the disapproval in her eyes as she looks at my fingers, busted up from yesterday’s fight. They’ve scarred a bit, but blood keeps coming out of the wounds, no matter how much I try to clean and bandage them. I should cover up my hand and hold it still instead of flexing it.

“Does it hurt?” she asks after we leave Iris’s school. I glance at the two extra security guards Mike sent to watch over Iris. Vargas is dangerous. With his connections, he can find out all sorts of secrets, especially since Eda, Iris’s mother, recently hooked up with a known corrupt cop. That’s why she showed up at my office, asking for money to leave with him and start fresh in another city where he got moved for disciplinary reasons. She threatened to take Iris away from me if I didn’t pay up. This goes against our agreement—that she can do what she wants, but the girl stays with her grandmother and remains close to me so I can keep an eye on her.

“It doesn’t hurt; it’s just uncomfortable.” I helped Eda get clean twice in the past, but unfortunately, she relapsed both times. This time, she seemed to be doing well, but since she moved in with the cop, she got mixed up with some shady people. This puts Iris at risk, and frankly, Eda might get herself hurt, too. It’s why her leaving would be best for everyone. But far away from me, Eda might risk losing her life. I can’t just leave Iris without her mom and dad if I have any say in it.

So Damien, Dominic, and I paid her new guy a visit. It was hard to get him to understand that leaving the city without Eda was his best option. We had to physically hold him back from hitting her right in front of us. It came down to a broken window, a smashed cabinet, and an ultimatum to leave the city in twenty-four hours; otherwise, Damien would send his file where it needed to go to get him to lose his job for good. Stella, Iris’s grandma, texted me to say that Eda moved back in with them that same night. Mission accomplished.

“I’m more worried about you,” I tell Lexi. “You’re going to have some nasty bruises. Let me check your shoulder, too, where that bastard pressed hard. When you were all pumped up with adrenaline, you didn’t feel a thing. How is it now?”

She turns to me, squeezes my arm, and asks in a low, serious tone, “What exactly happened to Iris’s father?”

She’s relentless in her pursuit of the truth, as usual. “It’s a sad story. It won’t do much good for you to hear it now, given everything you’ve been through. You need to recover and focus on your safety. Lexi, you can’t leave my side anymore. You get that, right? Vargas is more dangerous than you think. No more fooling around.”

Lexi squints at me, trying to make a funny face, but she looks exhausted. Her eyes are sunken, with dark circles around them. The weight of everything she’s been through shows on her face despite her brave smile.

“It may be a sad story, but it’s part of your life. And if you want to be part of mine, I need to know you—all of you. So, I think it’s time for you to trust me and tell me.”

Lexi’s gaze holds mine, determined. A knot forms in my stomach, but I know it’s time. Lexi deserves to know. I take a deep breath and start telling the story. It’s been forever, but the hurt is still there, as if the wounds of being abandoned never really healed.

“Once I turned sixteen, no foster family would take me. I was tall, cocky, and hard to handle. I joined a gang that did drag races, you know, at night or in the sketchy areas of town. We drove jacked-up cars and made good money off it. Poverty was all around us at the orphanage, but Jake and I always had money for food and cigarettes. We even bought food for the smaller kids, too.”

My voice is steady but heavy with the weight of those memories. I pause, my jaw tightening slightly from the strain of recalling the past.

“One night, in a police raid, a few of us got caught. I couldn’t run away since I had Jake with me. He was a scrawny kid with a lung disease. The judge said I was almost an adult and that he’d put me in jail, or I could just sign up instead. From jail, I went straight to a recruiting base. There was no time to take care of things before I left. I’d taken money in advance for the races. When the cops picked me up, they took everything they found on me. I enlisted and left Jake behind to pay off my debts.”

It hurts to think about what happened back then, but I keep going so she can hear the entire story.

“I didn’t know they’d go after him. They beat him up and forced him to drive. He took all the blows for me. I was in a safe place, but I left the only person who mattered to me vulnerable. Do you understand? Jake was just a kid, thinking he was doing something important for me. He was easy pickings. He couldn’t drive as well as I could, but he went along with it. After a few months, he went all in on a dangerous race. He ended up in a river and drowned, trapped in his car.”

I look at her for just a second, gauging her reaction as she absorbs every word I say. I shift my gaze back to the road, focusing on driving and trying to ignore the knot of grief tightening in my chest. It’s not easy to express how it feels to stand in front of a gravestone during a visit to your best friend.