Page 18 of Sink With Me

If Depth would’ve just fucking left us alone, I wouldn’t have to be here. I wouldn’t have to be making these choices. I could be happy. I could be free. I could have my family back.

I barge through the door, fumbling onto the deck letting the fresh air fill my nose. My stomach churns the few forkfuls of my meal. My hand clasps over my mouth.

This could’ve been prevented. I could be happily locked in a room somewhere back home with Daymen whispering all the things any woman would kill to hear. I rush over to the rail.

I will kill to hear those things.

Date: 4-30-2024

Time: 0712

What should’ve taken close to seven days has taken only six, five of which were oddly satisfying, despite the intense training I put every member through.

Each night I performed the same routine of standing on the deck watching the waves roll until sleep pulled at my lids and a deep baritone voice inside my head called my name and told me I needed to rest. I look at the swinging metal door. I pushed him away, I fought against something beautiful because of my ugly lifestyle.

Most soldiers took to this morning like they hit a second wind. Double checking supplies, going over roles and potential threats. I brush my hand through my shorter than usual hair, the color darker than I prefer since it makes me look washed out.

Half would infiltrate while the other half stayed back. Those tasked with the first had to memorize their aliases to a tee. Karma was just as much a liar as I was in this situation. My alias? Delilah Ballinheart. I was the Sergeant of a small task force in Australia called Greenport and was transferred for dishonorable discharge. I, Delilah, had slept with the Captain, who was married into a wealthy family. The background genuinely confused me until it was explained that Depth only started taking on criminals and lowlifes. And on paper, I now was one. With the new identity and somewhat decent change of appearance it should give me enough time.

Nonetheless, it gave plenty of cover for why most of us were arriving in a boat if we were spotted, and comparing a rank with a shitty background made me a simple acceptance. I'll just have to be quick before my cover is blown, if he sees me, it’s game over. I hope I’ll get to him first. But seriously… Delilah? Why a goddamn flower? At least Cordelia means ‘daughter of the sea’. I wonder when that water-loving familial trait disappeared for me.

A bitter taste coats my tongue, making my cheeks pinch like I just ate a whole lemon. The thought of throwing up again is enough to sap my energy. It’s hard to think about my parents, especially as I stand at the nose of a boat.

They’d be so proud of you facing your fears.

They would. Their love of being out on the ocean was as strong as their love for me. Their only child.

I step closer to the edge and look at the water. We’re getting closer to land faster than we expected, and that in itself excites me. We’re so close that I’m able to make out a few bodies that line the shore, surely taking in the beauty of the scene.

A thin fog shimmers above the steady roll of waves, glowing ethereally against the small bit of sunlight peeking through the clouds. Birds swoop and create tiny ripples against the water in hopes of their meal. It’s mesmerizing and daunting.

Maybe I should be going over the mission and giving some over-dramatic pep talk to my team, but we’re adults and in all honesty, I’ve prepared this team to the best of my ability—I can only do so much with the hand I was dealt. My stomach turns at the thought, making me clutch at my abdomen. If they fail, it’s my fault. If I fail…

I shake my head and turn away from the water, looking at the door again, chewing at the inside of my cheek. Maybe I was harsh. My feet follow a path of their own accord. Carrying me through the metal barrier, memorizing each step from that night until I’m starting down the flight of stairs.

Daymen hasn’t acted any different. He still smiles and still lingers close, but I know I’m different. The small bit of hope remains that maybe what he said is plausible. I can complete my mission with him, maybe we can try to make something together. I swallow against the stench of lying water. My phone vibrates, distracting me from my spiral. Pulling it from my pocket I place it to my ear whilst I knock on Daymen's door. No answer.

“Sharkie?”

Turning the knob I find the room barren. No luggage or movies, a neatly made cot. He’s already preparing. Stepping into the room as I replay my moments with Daymen.

“I’m not doing anything vile.” I answer Karma, I’m still pissed at our last interaction, but I’ll be able to get that out on someone else soon enough.

“Yeah, but you will be soon… enough.” She says cheerfully. Static starts to mingle with her voice making my brows furrow. I go still, pulling my phone from my ear. Everything is quiet. No humming from the engines or chattering from rooms over. We shouldn’t have docked yet.

“Are… still– there?”

My heart pounds in my chest. I don’t like being down here when it’s quiet.

“Yeah. What do you need?” I ask as I walk back into the hall looking to the dark end, dragging my gaze back to the steps.

“I figured… out.”

“What?” My nose scrunches from the pulling of my brows inward.

“Ca… you–me?”

“No, I can't hear you.” I roll my eyes. “Hold on. I'm going up to the deck.”

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