Lisa tosses it in the can, then spins around on her heels, nose in the air, and walks off.
"Sorry about that," I say to the homeless woman.
She doesn't respond. As I walk away, I turn back to look at her, stopping suddenly when I see her face.
Holy shit, it's her. The girl from last night.
No. It can't be her. There's no way.
Our eyes meet and it's confirmed. I know those eyes. And I know that face. It's definitely her.
I walk back to her. "Raine?"
She stares at me a moment, then turns and runs off.
"Raine!" I run after her, but then stop. There's no way I'll catch up to her. She's zigzagging through the crowded street so fast I've already lost track of her.
Turning back, I see Lisa waiting at the stoplight, glaring at me while she talks on her phone. I start to walk back, but stop when I see a backpack next to the trash can. I pick it up. It's navy blue and looks familiar. I take a moment to think, and then I remember. The other day, when I was having lunch with Lisa, we saw a homeless girl digging through the trash and putting what she found in a blue backpack that looked exactly like this one. That girl had to have been Raine.
Raine is homeless. I can't even wrap my mind around that. How did this happen? How did she end up like this? And how does she survive?
Last night is suddenly making sense. The reason she didn't want me asking questions. Why she ran off like that?
She didn't want me to know. She hid it from me last night, then said she couldn't see me again. I didn't understand why, but now I do. She didn't want me knowing she's homeless.
When I finally reach Lisa, the walk sign turns on and we cross the street.
"What the hell is that?" Lisa asks, pointing to the backpack.
"That girl left it behind. I didn't want someone to steal it."
"What girl? That disgusting homeless girl? The one blocking the trash can?"
"Just forget it," I mutter, not wanting to argue with her.
"You could get a disease just from touching that."
We go in the building and walk to the elevator.
"You DO know that girls like her are nothing but street whores," Lisa continues as we get in the elevator. I'm trying my best to ignore her but she doesn't stop. "How else do you think she survives? I'm sure she's a beggar, and a thief as well, but selling her body is where the real money's at."
"I have to go," I tell her as we get off on our floor. I go the opposite direction of our desks so I don't have to walk there with her. I seriously can't take another second of her.
I go in an empty conference room and close the door. Setting the backpack on the table, I unzip the main compartment. I probably shouldn't be looking in it but I'm hoping to find something that'll tell me where she stays so I can give this back to her. It's probably her one and only possession and she left it behind. Because of me. Because I scared her, or made her feel ashamed. I hope I didn't do either of those things but I obviously did something to make her run off like that.
The bag is stuffed to capacity and smells bad, like rotting food. The thing must be full of bacteria and yet this is where she stores her food. It's not safe. She could get sick. I'm sure she has, many times.
I pull out a slice of pizza. It's not even wrapped and only half of it is left. She was going to eat this. A half-eaten slice of pizza that was in the garbage. The same garbage people spit in and use to discard their dog poop bags. I shudder just thinking about it.
Continuing to pull stuff out, I find a partially eaten cookie, a half-empty bottle of soda, an apple with a bite taken out of it, an unopened piece of string cheese, and a couple half-empty bags of potato chips. Underneath all the food is a wadded-up rain poncho, a faded blue baseball cap, and some tampons. The outer wrappers of the tampons are covered in dirt, like maybe she found them on the ground.
Next I check the two outer pockets of the backpack. The first one has nothing in it. The other one has a knife. A pocket knife. Probably her only protection.
How does she live this way? How does she survive? Where does she sleep at night? I'm guessing it's close to the coffee shop. That first night I saw her, she came in to use the bathroom. Zoe acted like she does that all the time. And the girl working the register last night said something to Raine about using the bathroom, like she assumed that's why she was there.
It's only two but I want to get out of here and go find her. What if she moved? What if she found a new spot to live, knowing I'd be looking for her? I don't know why she'd do that. I'm not a threat. If anything, I want to help her. It kills me to know she's out there with no food, no place to sleep, no place to shower.
I hope what Lisa said earlier isn't true. I hope Raine hasn't resorted to selling her body to survive. It makes me sick to even think of some disgusting guy touching her. A guy she doesn't like and doesn't want to be with, but has to, in order to eat. That better not be happening.