It's sweet he wants to celebrate my birthday. I haven't celebrated it in years, not since I was a kid and one of the teachers at school brought in cupcakes because she knew my dad wouldn't do anything. That was fourth grade. All the other years, my dad would celebrate my birthday by going out so I could have the house to myself. He said that was my gift, which was fine with me. I didn't like having him home. He'd get drunk and play the TV too loud or sometimes he'd bring home a woman and I'd hear them having sex in his room.
When I was living with Rob, he wasn't home on my birthday. He was off on another one of his trips. Before he left, he gave me three crisp hundred dollar bills and told me to buy whatever I wanted. I didn't really need anything so I had a spa day, which is something I'd never done. Then at night I ordered takeout and ate it in bed while watching TV. It was one of my better birthdays but I wish I hadn't been alone. Rob didn't even call me that day.
After Miles leaves for work, I take a long hot shower, then wash my clothes. As they're drying, I watch a little TV and fall asleep on the couch. In the afternoon, I head out to search for jobs. With clean clothes and clean hair, I feel more confident now, like I might actually have a chance at a job.
I skip past the places I went to yesterday that told me they weren't hiring, although I think some of them just told me that because they didn't want me applying. That was definitely true for the fancy clothing boutique I stopped at. The sales girl wouldn't even let me inside. She met me at the door and said they weren't hiring before I could even ask.
There's a gas station at the corner and when I pass by, I spot a Help Wanted sign. I walk back and go inside. An old bald guy with a huge belly is working the register.
I walk up to him. "I wanted to ask about the job?"
"Go to the website and fill out the form," he says. "They'll call you if they're interested."
"Um, yeah, I just moved and they said it'll take awhile to get internet set up. Is there any way I could just fill out a form by hand and bring it in?"
He sighs and reaches under the counter, then shoves a piece of paper at me. "The manager already has someone in mind. You might want to fill this out now if you want a chance."
"Okay. Is there someplace to sit?"
"There's a table outside around back. It's for employees but go ahead and use it."
Taking the form, I go outside and around the building to the back. The table is a picnic table covered in sticky soda and crumbs. I wipe it off the best I can, then sit down and fill out the form. After my name is the line for my address. I hesitate, not sure I should do this but knowing leaving it blank will make them question me about it if I get an interview. I jot down Miles' address along with his phone number. We talked about this at breakfast and decided if they call him, he'll tell them I'm unavailable and will call them back.
When I return to the store, I have to wait in line to give the guy the form.
"Do you know when someone will get back to me?" I ask.
"No idea," he says, shoving the form under the counter. "Kid, I got a line here. You gotta move."
I nod, then go out the door. I'm not confident I'll get an interview. I'm not even sure the manager will get my application. That guy at the register didn't seem to like me. I wouldn't be surprised if he took the form and threw it out. If I'd applied online, that wouldn't happen. I'm going to have to ask Miles if I can use his computer.
As I'm walking down the street, I feel someone tap me on the shoulder. "Haven't seen you lately. Where you been?"
I turn and see an older man in a suit keeping pace with me. He looks like someone's middle-aged dad with a balding head and deep wrinkles across his forehead. I've seen him before. He works at one of the office buildings and goes to the park to have his lunch when the weather's warm. I've never talked to him but I've noticed him watching me.
"I've been busy," I say, walking faster.
"Busy doing what?" he asks, smiling at me.
"I'm trying to find a job." I look away, staring straight ahead, hoping he'll get the message to go away.
"If you need money, I might be able to help."
I glance at him. "You know of a job?"
"I do. And it's easy money." He winks at me, making it clear what this 'job' is he's talking about.
"Not interested," I say, noticing the wedding ring on his hand. So he's a cheater and a pervert, and yet he has some fancy job where he probably gets paid lots of money while I can't even get a job at a gas station.
He grabs my arm and yanks me off the street into an alley. "You want money or not?"
"Stop!" I yell, kicking him while I try to free my arm. "Help! Someone help!"
He glances at the street, noticing all the people going by. He lets me go and steps back. "Little bitch. You're not worth it."
He walks back to the street. I wait a few minutes to make sure he's gone, then sneak down the alley to the other street and walk the other direction. I don't see him anywhere and this is a busy street with people on both sides of me so I should feel safe but I don't. I've never felt safe out here but it's never been this bad. Is it because Gladys is gone? Or because I've been staying with Miles? Or because I've been thinking more about Rob and what Miles said about Rob sending someone after me? I think it's the combination of all those things making me more fearful than I was before, and then I get attacked, adding to my fear.
I should keep looking for jobs but I don't feel like it now. I'm too shook up from what happened. I just want to go back to Miles' place where I feel safe.