Page 152 of Holding On

I reluctantly go to the table and sit across from him, setting my cereal bowl down. "What?"

"Guys aren't the same as girls. We can't always share stuff like you girls do. Sometimes we have to keep it to ourselves, think about it in our heads. That's just how we're made. We don't talk about shit."

"I know that, but Ethan and I are close. We've already talked about stuff. Personal stuff. So I don't know why he's holding back now."

"Because he's not ready to talk. If he's already opened up to you about other things, then you should be happy about that. It means he really likes you. Maybe even loves you."

"He doesn't love me," I mutter, swirling my spoon around my cereal.

"You sure about that?" He holds up the bouquet of flowers that's on the table. "A guy doesn't send this many flowers to a girl unless he's crazy about her. You know how much this must've cost him?"

"He's rich. His parents give him money."

"He didn't have to do this, Becca."

"Now you're on his side too?" I drop my spoon in the bowl. "Why is nobody on my side? First Tina, then you?"

He smiles. "Maybe because we know you tend to be a little impulsive."

"Impulsive?" I huff. "I'm not impulsive."

"Then call it something else, but the truth is, you tend to overreact when something or someone pisses you off. You're not great at giving second chances."

"Are you kidding?" I burst from my chair. "I have given Ethan not one, not two, but at LEAST three chances after he's acted like a complete asshole. You, of all people, as my protective older brother, should be the last person telling me to give Ethan another chance."

"Then don't take him back, if that's really what you want. I'm just saying that maybe it'd be good to take some time to cool off instead of just giving up on him."

"Why are you pushing me to be with him? When I first started seeing him, you kept telling me to stay away from him."

"That was before I saw how happy he makes you."

"He doesn't make me happy," I scoff. "I was just delirious from all the great—" I stop before I say 'sex'.

Mike's staring at me. "Okay, I didn't need to know that. On second thought, maybe it's best if you stay away from him."

"I wasn't going to say—" I quit before I dig myself even deeper. "Never mind. Going back to your point, I admit that Ethan does kinda sorta make me happy."

"Kinda sorta?" Mike smiles. "Like the way you kinda sorta like cookie dough ice cream?"

I love cookie dough ice cream. Worship it. Adore it. I could eat it at every meal. Every day.

"It's not that type of like," I insist.

"And yet when you talk about Ethan, you look as happy as you do when you dish up a bowl of cookie dough ice cream."

"That's not true."

"You're right. You look even happier when you talk about Ethan."

I roll my eyes. "I need to get to bed." I take my bowl to the sink.

"There's more flowers in your room."

I turn back to Mike. "Are you serious?"

"At least ten dozen. Maybe more. I lost count."

I sigh. "This is ridiculous. We're over. I'm not taking him back. There was never any future for us anyway. He needs to accept that and move on."

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