Page 79 of Still Love You

"The thing with Willow is that I don't think she's intentionally trying to hurt you. I think she's just confused about what she wants, but while she's trying to figure that out, she strings you along, making you think you two have a future together."

He's not telling me anything I don't already know. I know Willow is confused. She says she wants a certain type of life, but deep down, I know she's not sure if that's really what she wants. Which is why I'm trying to convince her to think about other alternatives. Do those alternatives include me? Yes, but my main concern is that she's happy. Even if she chooses not to be with me, I still want her to be happy.

"Are you done now?" I ask.

"Yeah." He gets up. "Let's go unload the truck."

After we do that, I go home and study for my test. Willow calls at ten.

"Did you get everything for the party?" she asks.

"Yeah, he's all set. It sounds like there's going to be a lot of people there. You need to bring a suit so we can go swimming."

"I don't think I want to swim."

"It's part of the dress code. Trent wants all girls to show up in a bikini."

She laughs. "Yeah, that sounds like Trent. That's probably the only reason he's having the party. I'll bring a suit, but I don't know if I'll wear it."

"So what'd you do tonight?"

"I went to a movie with my parents. It wasn't that great." She pauses. "Can I come over?"

"I really need to study."

"Oh." She sounds disappointed. "Okay. Then I'll talk to you tomorrow."

"Yeah. Goodnight." I really want to see her, but I think we need time apart. I need Willow to see what it's like to not have me around so she can decide if that's really what she wants.

The next morning I go to class. It's taught on Saturday mornings because most of the people taking it are a lot older than me and have full-time jobs during the week. 

After class I stop by the farmers' market to see if my mom needs any help, but she and Martin are handling the crowds fine without me. I stop over at Carl and Candace's booth, which is just across from my mom's. Candace is there and says Willow is home making signs for the vendor fair. She's really getting into this fair. I hope she sells a lot, given how much work she's put into it.

I go home, grab some lunch, then head to the beach. It's been forever since I surfed, and surfing will keep my mind off Willow. It's crazy how much I miss her but we need our space. We can't spend every second together.

At five I head over to her house. She called at three to say her parents had left, but I was still at the beach and had to go home and clean up.

"Finally!" she says as she hugs me at the door.

She's wearing a short black dress with a halter neckline that leaves all kinds of skin exposed for me to kiss; shoulders, neck, cleavage.

"What do you mean?" I ask as we go inside.

"You're finally letting me see you. It's like you've been hiding out for a day." She drags me to the couch. I sit down and she sits right next to me, our bodies touching.

"You can't go a day without seeing me?" 

"I can. I just don't want to."

If she really feels that way, then why doesn't she want to be with me? Beyond just this summer?

"Trent called and asked if we could head over there early and help set up the food, but we don't have to."

"I don't mind. Let's go." She jumps up, holding her hand out to me.

I take her hand and pull her onto my lap. "Don't you want to say hello first?"

"Hello." She smiles, then leans over and kisses me.

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