Page 28 of Still Love You

"It wasn't anything serious. I'd meet a girl, we'd date for a while, then move on. At that age I was still figuring out who I was and what I wanted out of life. When I was a freshman in college, I thought I'd be a—" He smiles. "Why don't you take a guess? What do you think I wanted to do for a career?"

"I don't know. Something having to do with agriculture or the environment?"

He shakes his head. "No. I thought I'd be a lawyer."

"A lawyer? You hate lawyers."

"I do now, but back then I wanted to be one."

"Why?"

"I was 18 and had to pick a career so that's what I picked. I used to watch a lot of those legal shows on TV."  

"So what happened? Why didn't you become a lawyer?"

"Because it wasn't for me. I worked at a law firm freshman year and watched the other lawyers, saw what they did all day, and realized that wasn't what I wanted to do. Sitting at a desk? Working a hundred hours a week? Writing and rewriting contracts? Arguing with people? That wasn't me at all. I don't know what I was thinking."

"Is there a reason you're telling me this?"

"I just want you to consider all your options."

"I have, and I know this is what I want to do. I know you think all corporations are evil and out to destroy the world, but I don't agree."

"I've only said that about a few companies, not all of them. I'm not trying to talk you out of going into business. I just want you to be happy. I don't want you spending every waking moment at work."

"You spend all your time at the farm."

"Yes, but it's my passion. I love being there. And I always had your mom and you there with me. My job didn't take me away from my family. Honey, what I'm trying to say is to explore your options. Talk to people who are in those executive positions you want to be in someday. Interview a CEO. Ask him or her what a typical day is like. I have no doubt you could run a company someday and be very successful. But I also want you to be happy."

"I got it, Dad."

He pats my knee. "Lecture over." He turns the radio up and listens to one of his talk radio programs until we get home. As he parks in the driveway, he says, "You should go in and tell your mom you won't be joining us for dinner."

When I get inside, she's already making the tofu. She has all these different tofu recipes and they're all disgusting.

"I'm eating with Silas tonight," I say, then rush to my room so she won't ask me any questions. I got enough questions from my dad, as well as a lecture.

Why was he saying all that stuff to me? He never gives me advice on school or my career. He and my mom say you should let a child find their own path in life and not interfere. So does my dad think I'm on the wrong path? Did he change his mind about interfering?

Sometimes I think I am on the wrong path. I know I want to work in business, but I'm not a hundred percent sure I want to work for a huge corporation and eventually run it. I've never told anyone this, but I'd really like to start my own company. I'm just too afraid to do it. Too afraid I'd fail. So I'm taking the safe route; getting an entry level job at a large corporation and working my way to the top. It sounds boring when I think about it. It doesn't excite me at all, but I'm sure it will once I actually have a job.

My phone rings and I yank it out of my pocket and see it's Silas calling. I answer it. "Hey, that was fast."

"I had to hurry. I'm starving. And I want to see you."

He's flirting again. Did he not hear me last night? I told him to move on. This is not moving on. But I'll play along. In fact, I'm going to flirt right back.

"I can't wait to see you too."

"Then get your ass down here."

A flutter of excitement skitters through me. His flirting should not get to me like this, but it does. I hang up and stash my phone in my pocket on my way out of my room.

I pass my parents in the living room. "Bye, Dad. Bye, Mom."

"Willow, wait." My dad meets me at the door and hands me a twenty. "Have fun tonight." He kisses my head.

"I will. Thanks."

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