Page 101 of Always Us

“Eventually, yeah.” I hope she ends this line of questioning quickly because I’m not good at talking about death. I don’t even like to think about it.

“How long did it take?”

“I don’t remember. It was years ago.”

She stops brushing her doll’s hair. “It takes years to feel better?”

“No. That’s not what I meant. My mom died years ago. I felt better in a few weeks.” It’s not true, but I’m trying to be positive for Lilly. I can’t say exactly when the sadness went away after my mom died. Honestly, I think some of it’s still there.

“Is your dad going to die?”

My dad? What is she talking about? My dad is dead. And then I realize she means Frank. I forgot I told her he’s my dad.

“No. He won’t die for a long time.”

“Because he’s not old enough?”

So many questions. And why is she asking me and not her parents?

“Yeah. He’s not old enough.”

“Is your dad the same age as my dad?”

“Almost the same. They’re just a few years apart.”

“Okay.” She returns to brushing her doll’s hair. Whatever I said must’ve made her feel better because now she’s smiling.

Garret comes in wearing a white t-shirt and blue striped pajama pants. Damn, I should’ve worn pajama pants. They’re way more comfortable than jeans. He’s carrying one of those reusable grocery bags.

He sets it on the bed. “Look what I got.”

Lilly looks in the bag. “Licorice! And soda!”

“And bags of popcorn. Charles made us some snacks but don’t tell your mom.”

“I won’t.” She grabs a string of licorice.

Katherine doesn’t allow Lilly to have candy, so if she catches us, she’ll be mad. But I think she left. When I was coming back to Lilly’s room, I looked down the stairs and saw Katherine with her coat on, heading out the door.

So much for the comment Pearce made earlier. Family time after eight? Yeah, right. Katherine’s gone. We can’t find Pearce. And who knows where Grandma Kensington went? At least Garret, Lilly, and I are having family time.

Lilly has some candy and soda and falls asleep, all within a half hour. Garret and I stay on her bed and finish watching the princess cartoon. Garret sneaks his arm above Lilly’s head and around my shoulder, his hand dangling down. I thread our fingers together and use my other hand to eat my licorice.

To an outsider, tonight would’ve seemed completely crazy. Nonstop drama. Secrets revealed. And it all ends with a princess cartoon. But now that I’m part of this family, it doesn’t seem strange at all. Just a typical Friday night at the Kensington mansion.

The next morning at eight, I leave to pick up Harper at Moorhurst. Garret had planned to go with me, but then decided to stay home and talk to his dad, who we still haven’t seen since last night.

Harper can’t drive yet because of her shoulder so I’m picking her up, which means I had to borrow one of Pearce’s Mercedes. I’m afraid to drive it because I’m afraid I’ll get in an accident. Pearce has so much money he wouldn’t care, but I’m still nervous driving his car.

As I approach the Moorhurst sign, I get an anxious, queasy feeling in my stomach, like I had when I first arrived on campus last year. I don’t know why I keep feeling this way whenever I come back here.

Before I left this morning, Garret reminded me to think of all the good things that happened at Moorhurst and forget all the bad. So that’s what I’m trying to do. I see the big stone buildings where I used to have class and it makes me think of going to English class with Garret and the notebooks we shared. Then I see some girls running toward the trail I ran on a million times last year. I remember racing Garret on that trail the weekend before classes started. He told me he liked me and I thought he was going to kiss me. He didn’t, but I really wanted him to.

As I drive into the parking lot in front of my old dorm, someone pulls out and I take the spot, then realize it’s the same spot where Ryan parked on the night I arrived here and met Garret for the very first time. I was so mean to him. I couldn’t figure out why some guy I just met would want to help me move into my room.

I get out of the car and see Jasmine coming out of the dorm. Her hair is longer, but other than that, she looks the same.

“Jade, is that you?” She comes over as I lock the car.

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