Page 68 of You Complicate Me

Grace had been telling the truth. She didn’t have anything to do with Sadie calling off the wedding and running away. Sadie had acted like the stupid kid she was all on her own. Even if Grace hadn’t called her a cab and helped her escape without being seen, someone else would have. And Nick now knew he wouldn’t have been able to talk Sadie off the ledge. The wedding had been doomed and nothing he could’ve said would’ve fixed anything.

Hearing you explain how you know who “the one” is was a wake-up call for me, Nicky. I thought all I ever wanted was a family, but now I want what you and Grace have. Michael is wonderful and perfect and I love him, but he’s not the one. He deserves someone better than me. And deep down, I know I deserve better, too, but I’m just too messed up to go after it right now. I have to find myself before I can find the one who is meant for me.

So, technically, he supposed, if anyone could be blamed for Sadie’s epic case of cold feet, it was Nick, which just made everything worse. Especially since instead of telling Grace he loved her, he’d accused her of purposefully sabotaging his sister’s life and marriage.

If he could kick his own ass, he would. He was going to have to do some pretty epic groveling to get Grace to forgive him this time. Pretty words and flowers and orgasms weren’t going to cut it. At this point, he wasn’t even sure jewelry, the top tier of I’m-sorry-I-was-a-dumbass gifts, would fix what he’d fucked up. Maybe he could—

A tentative knock on the door separating his room from Grace’s snapped him out of his mental calculations.

He was at the door and yanked it open so fast Grace’s hand was still poised to knock when they came face to face. Her eyes were red-rimmed and puffy, which made him want to kick his own ass even more than he had before. And that was saying a lot, because he was really pissed off at himself.

Nick expelled a huge breath before blurting, “God, Grace, I was such a fucking idiot. I have no idea what I was even thinking. I know you didn’t have anything to do with why Sadie left. I’m so, so sorry.”

Her eyes narrowed. “How do you know I didn’t have anything to do with why Sadie left? Is it because you realized I would never do anything to intentionally hurt Sadie and Michael—or because Sadie told you so in her letter?”

He had a feeling she didn’t want to hear him say both, even though it was true. But judging by the look on her face, he wasn’t even sure there was a right answer to her question. Honesty would have to do, he supposed. “I would’ve known that, had I not been so scared for Sadie, and pissed off that I’d failed at trying to take care of her again. I do know that you’d never do anything like that. It just…took me a little while to clear my head and see that.”

Grace stared at him so hard for a moment that he wondered if she was trying to bore a hole through his skull with nothing but the power of her eyes. But eventually, she nodded and said, “It’s okay. I understand, and I forgive you.”

If he hadn’t been so fucking relieved to hear those words, he might’ve noticed how flat her voice sounded, or how cold her eyes looked. There was nothing at all Grace-like in how she looked or sounded in that moment. But relief overruled his common sense and he let out all his pent-up tension in the form of a huge sigh as he reached for her. “Grace, you won’t regret it. In fact, I need to tell you what I was trying to tell you earlier, before everything happened. The truth is that I lov—”

Grace held up a hand to interrupt him and took a huge step back, out of his reach.

All the relief Nick had felt only a moment ago died a hard, swift death. Suddenly the space between them felt like the fucking Continental Divide. Nick’s entire body went cold. “What’s wrong?” he asked, not at all sure he really wanted her answer.

“Look,” she began, her eyes lifting, but not meeting his, “today was a really good reminder of what we are. This whole thing has just happened so fast. If we keep this up, if you move to LA, we’re really no better than Sadie and Michael. We just don’t know each other well enough for that.”

He wanted to keep a cool head this time, to not go off the deep end and say things he shouldn’t. That’s what had got him in the mess, after all. But he couldn’t stop himself from saying, “That’s such bullshit. We’re not anything like Sadie and Michael. We’re grown-ups, first of all. You’re not at all confused about who you are, and neither am I. And I know you, Grace. We might not have known each other for a long time, but I know you.”

That brought a little heat to her eyes. Just not the good kind, sadly. “No, you don’t,” she said. “If you did know me, you would’ve known that I didn’t intentionally ruin Sadie and Michael’s wedding.”

His chin hit his chest. “So you don’t really forgive me. That’s okay. I understand. We can fix this. I just—”

“No. I do forgive you. I need to thank you, actually.”

Never had the words thank you sounded so terrifying. “Why would you thank me?”

She shrugged her shoulders in a careless gesture that was at odds with her tight expression. “We’ve been caught up in all the…physical stuff. The chemistry between us. We haven’t been using our heads. Today you reminded me that I need to be logical, rational about our relationship.”

Which was the most ridiculous thing he’d ever heard. There was nothing logical or rational about emotions and relationships. They were messy and complicated and irrational. Truly rational people would never let themselves fall in love. “And what would a logical, rational person do about our relationship?”

A little furrow appeared between her brows. “A logical, rational person would stick to our original agreement. I said I’d be with you for one week. Our one week is up. It’s time to go back to our real lives now.”

Nick grabbed her shoulders firmly enough to keep her from moving further away from him—because fuck the Continental Divide—but gently enough not to hurt or scare her. “My real life is you, Grace. I love you. I don’t give a fuck if we’ve only known each other a week, and I don’t give a fuck about logical and rational. I love you.”

She shut her eyes and wrapped her arms around her stomach as if his words had hurt her. “I don’t want to hear that. This is all too much, Nick. The thing with Sadie and Michael, you living on the other end of the country, the fact that we’ve had two terrible, ugly fights in the course of only a few days…I just can’t do it. You said yourself when this thing started that you didn’t do complicated. Well, we complicate each other, Nick.” She shook her head sadly. “I’m going home. By myself.”

Well, this is not at all how he expected his first-ever I love you declaration to play out. “Grace, I don’t think it’s all as complicated as we’ve made it seem. The thing with Sadie and Michael is over. It doesn’t have anything to do with us. I already told you I’m more than happy to move to be closer to you. There’s nothing tying me to Chicago anymore. I won’t rush you into anything more. After I move, we’ll date like normal people. And as for our fights…well, those were my fault. I’ve never done this before. I’ll surely fuck things up every now and then. But if you’re willing to try, I know we can make it work.”

Her head came up and she finally looked him right in the eye, and he knew before she said it that they were over. She was done with him. He’d finally managed to screw things up with her irreparably.

“I’m not willing to try,” she said, her voice sounding horrible and firm and nothing at all like her normal voice. “We’re just…too different.”

Because you’re poor, dumb trailer trash and she’s a lawyer. She’s too good for you.

Nick forced himself to shake the negative thoughts off. Fuck those old insecurities! Shit like that wasn’t going to help his cause. It never had.

He couldn’t stop himself from yanking her into his arms. “Don’t do this,” he whispered. “If you need some space, I’ll give it to you. But don’t make it forever.”

---