Page 46 of Master of My Heart

Chapter Seventeen

Monday morning was her first class with the ballet company. Rehearsals for The Nutcracker would start after lunch. When she walked into the big, sunlit studio on the third floor, her heartbeat quickened in anticipation.

Jayson, Liz, and Jon were with her. Jayson chuckled as Sabrina sucked in deep breaths and tried to calm her nerves. The company wasn’t huge, but it was bigger than back home. Jon and Liz headed to one side of the studio, Jayson to the other. Sabrina hesitated until Jayson motioned for her to follow. She felt incredibly self-conscious as she hurried across the room and sat down next to him.

“You’ll be fine,” Jayson said as he pulled on his slippers. He gave her an endearing smile. “Just be yourself. Remember, most of them saw your audition and know how good you are. You belong here.”

Sabrina nodded, but the butterflies in her stomach were so aggressive, she was afraid she’d get sick.

A few minutes later, Martin walked in and headed toward her. “How are you feeling?” he asked.

She stood quickly. “Much better. Thank you for asking.”

He smiled. “I’m so happy you’re here, Sabrina. I was devastated when you didn’t contact me after you graduated. I thought someone else had snatched you up.”

She bit her lip. He wasn’t completely wrong. “I would have if I could, Martin,” she said sincerely. “There was nowhere else I imagined going.”

He looked like he wanted to say something, but just smiled again. “Well, you’re here now and that’s what counts.” He glanced at Jayson. “Since the two of you are dancing together, I’m expecting you to help her out.”

“Of course,” Jayson said with a nod. “I’d planned on it, even if we weren’t dancing together.”

Martin gave an approving nod. “Good.” He looked at Sabrina. “I know it’s been a while since you’ve partnered, but Jayson’s a good teacher. Watch him, ask questions. Get used to his presence. It’s different, dancing on your own versus dancing with another person in your personal space. Watch him in the mirror and try to match his movements.”

Sabrina nodded and glanced at Jayson, who smiled. “It’ll be okay. We have plenty of time to get ready.”

As they started to warm up, Sabrina watched Jayson and tried to match his movements. He was easy to follow... and a good-looking man to study.

“Sabrina, it’s okay for me to adjust to your body, too,” he whispered. “You don’t have to copy me on everything.”

“I’m just trying to get used to things. It’s easier if I follow you.”

He smiled. “Okay.”

During the cross-floor jumps, Martin scolded Jayson for lessening the power of his moves. “I bet she can keep up with you. Give it your all.”

The next set, he out-jumped her on the first one, but she caught up on the second. By the third, they were in sync.

“Good job!” Martin exclaimed when they finished. He beamed at her, then grinned at Jayson.

Jayson smiled as they walked to the back of the room. “You’re a fantastic jumper, Sabrina. Women can’t usually jump that far.”

“It’s always been one of my strong points, but I rarely get to do it full strength.”

*****

After lunch, they started rehearsals. Jayson and Sabrina worked on their pas de deux until mid-afternoon when school let out and the kids were available for rehearsal of the first act’s party scene. Sabrina did her best to not be distracted by Jayson dancing so close to her, but it was a challenge. The only time men were around her in her past was for sexual reasons. Jayson touched her, picked her up, and it was all totally innocent. This was partnering. But Sabrina was confused. Her mind knew and understood. Her body, on the other hand, became stimulated.

At break, she went into the bathroom and cried. How could she be a professional dancer if she couldn’t stop thinking about sex every time a man touched her? And it wouldn’t only be Jayson. She would dance with several men throughout the ballet. No wonder Ramon didn’t want her partnering.

What a disgusting creature she was to not even be able to handle dancing with a man.

Maybe Jayson would be willing to help. They’d already slept together and he’d said he enjoyed it. Maybe he’d be willing to do it again.

No, she couldn’t ask Jayson to help with something like that. He’d probably be disgusted with her again. She’d have to figure something else out. Somehow.

She glanced at her watch, splashed some water on her face, and headed out. The studio hummed with the excited chatter of the younger dancers milling around and showing off. Sabrina lingered by the door, uncertain of what to do. She didn’t know anyone in there.

Most of the boys were older, probably mid- to late teens. A few of them were taller than her, and she found herself a little relieved. She’d been afraid she’d look out of place.