Page 5 of Spike

Every year, on this day, the nightmare returned, dragging me back into the darkness of that terrible place.

I sat up, breaths ragged, the room silent except for the echoes of my pounding heart.

The weight of loss and guilt pressed down on me as I stared into the darkness.

The monster living inside my skin growled softly within me. All of a sudden, my room felt unbearably hot, the oppressive heat closing in on me from all sides.

I swung my legs over the side of the bed, feeling the cool floor beneath my feet. I hastily pulled on my clothes.

The monster's presence surged, urging me to move faster, to escape the stifling atmosphere.

I pulled on my leather cut, the familiar weight settling on my shoulders. Running my fingers over the Grizzly Reapers patch, I finally dared to look at myself in the full-length mirror near the door.

The gangly teenager who failed to save his best friend was no more, replaced by a man who’d seen his share of ugly in the world.

Yet, that scared boy still lingered within me. That boy would always be a part of me. Exiting my room, I descended the stairs, making my way to the bar area of the MC clubhouse.

This early in the day, the place was mostly empty, save for a few fallen-asleep bear shifters on the tables. But he was there.

Venom. The King of Monsters, as the rest of the paranormal world called him. My lead alpha.

Venom was engaged in conversation with Mayhem, both nursing cups of coffee. As I approached, Venom's piercing gaze locked onto me.

Could he sense the turmoil within me, the frustration and anger of my inner grizzly?

Two years running, I challenged him for his position, and twice, I lost badly.

My best friend Nitro had looked after me with patience, but he made it clear that he wouldn't be doing it a third time.

What was wrong with me, Nitro had asked? I wasn't too certain myself. When I issued those challenges to Venom, I knew the outcome.

Venom could have torn me apart, but he didn't. He let me live, and part of me was a little disappointed by that, but I also knew it wasn't wise to keep pushing him.

Venom crooked a finger towards me, and I halted a few feet from him.

Mayhem sipped his coffee and regarded me warily, as if I were a bomb waiting to go off any second.

I met Venom's gaze, trying to read his thoughts, but his cold merciless eyes revealed nothing.

"I don't know what's eating you, Spike," Venom said in a low voice. "But stop using me to punish yourself for whatever sins you've committed in the past."

I swallowed hard, the inner grizzly restless, clawing at the confines of my self-control.

My jaw tightened, but I remained silent.

"You've been incredibly patient with this one," Mayhem remarked, his gaze flickering towards me.

The comment bristled my fur, even though deep down, I understood its truth. Mayhem continued, looking directly at me,

"Spike, if you take on Venom again this year, it won't end the same way,” Mayhem said.

I swallowed hard, aware of the weight of his warning. The memories of the past challenges lingered in head.

Nodding, I finally managed to say, "I understand. That's why I'm taking a few personal days off this week."

"Good idea," Mayhem said in approval.

I turned away from them. Hoping to keep my composure until I exited the clubhouse, I took measured steps toward the door.

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