Page 2 of Shattered Echoes

“Yes, big brother, we’ve made it to Shadow's Bend,” I respond, unable to keep the slight sarcastic bite out of my tone. Leo hears it but doesn't acknowledge it.

“I assumed you would have by now,” he says dryly.

I remain silent, hoping he will carry on with what he has to say.

After a brief second, he continues. “You know the driver will head back as soon as he drops you off. Just wanted to make sure everything is okay with you.”

I look out the windows as we drive by some ancient stalls, tuning out what he is saying. Passing by the farmer’s market, the scent of fresh food is thick in the air. It draws out memories of bustling crowds roaming around the market and going about their day.

Yet, to my surprise, the once vibrant market looks a lot quieter. As people have moved to the big cities. I recall spending countless Saturdays hanging out on this spot as a boy, along with my best friend Henry, and a few other township boys we usually met in the streets. We’d run between stalls and sometimes knock people’s goods over.

Fun crazy times

We would sit on a bench in the corner, sharing snacks we bought with the money we earned from helping merchants load and unload their goods and share stories while watching the crowds go by. On some days, I'd sing and perform with my boys as backup singers. We’d do that until a member of my family came to take me away angrily. My father hated I mingled with the township boys and hated it even more when I sang at the market. He was a classist like that and thought I was shaming the family. But that made me want to do it more.

“Antonio, are you still there?” he asks.

“Yes, brother, hear you loud and clear.”

“Yeah, so, I've made everything available to you. I had people clean up the house, and the fridge is also stocked up. Eventually, though, you'll need to go get groceries. Um…There’s cash in the safe, more than enough cash than you’ll need. But if you end up needing more cash, call me, and I will have someone bring you some. Ultimately, I believe you will be fine,” he explained patiently.

The more he speaks, the more irritated I get. “Wow! You mean I don't even get to handle my money now?” I scoff.

“Maybe if I trusted you enough to be responsible, and not try to buy drugs, I might let you handle your own money,” Leo replies with a slightly raised tone.

His words cut deep. With furrowed eyebrows and down turned lips, I adjust myself on the seat, feeling the weight of his words in the pit of my stomach.

I feel like a fucking toddler, being told what to do at every point. Leo locked up all my bank accounts and wouldn't let me access any of it. I didn't even know anyone could do that without my consent. Why am I even surprised? It's the Amatos we’re talking about here. With the amount of money and power my family has, not much is impossible.

I know why he did that, though. He knows I wouldn't be able to make big purchases, or else I'd run out of money pretty quickly. Then he’d know that something was definitely wrong.

Well played, Leo.

Knowing Leo, I am sure he'd made all the arrangements and contingency plans just to make sure that I get whatever he thinks I am supposed to get from this experience.

“Nice one, brother. That's very reassuring of you,” I bite out, already teetering on the edge.

Leo snaps at me. “Don’t you dare give me lip, Antonio,” he warns, his patience wearing thin.

My situation has not been easy on either of us. We're both just stretched thin, trying to navigate through it all. We've fought more than we’ve had civil conversations since my OD.. Personally, I'm exhausted–both emotionally and physically. I know Leo wants what's best for me. He's been super protective of me, seeing that we only have each other now.

But I just can’t help reacting the way I do. He can’t help himself either.

“Need I remind you that the last time you were left to your own devices, you OD'd?”

“Do you know what would have happened if your manager didn't show up at your house at that exact time? You would have fucking died, Antonio. You would have died! That's what would have happened. So, don't sit down there and give me attitude,” Leo fumes. I can feel his anger rising from the strain in his voice.

I press my lips shut because I don't have a rebuttal for that. He's absolutely right. I could have really died. But that’s the thing. After this whole Cassie situation, a part of me believes that maybe I really wanted to die. I hold back from digging deeper into that part of me because I fear the answer that I might turn up with.

In a low, gentle voice, I say, “Leonardo, I didn't fucking die. I'm still here. People make mistakes.”

“Mistakes? You call that a mistake? A mistake is spilling drinks on your colleague, or forgetting a dear friend’s birthday. What you did was more than a fucking mistake! That's a colossal fuck up. You were never the type to do such stupid things,” Leo rants, the force of his voice reverberating in my ear. “Just when everything was going great in my life, you fuck everything up!” he continues.

“No, darling, you can't say that to him,” I hear someone in the background say. I suck in a harsh breath. It’s Gabriella scolding him.

Leo, no longer speaking into the phone, answers his wife, “But you know it's true.”

“That's still hurtful. Don't do that,” she replies.

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