Page 3 of Holiday Situationship

“Yeah, I get that,” I say, aiming for a casual tone. “I feel the same. It’s a lot of work getting to know someone new.”

I pause, hoping the subtle hint lands because, truthfully, the thought of starting fresh with a stranger seems daunting when I’m constantly comparing every potential date to Sam.

“We’ll be dateless together,” I suggest with a light laugh. “We’ll be each other’s backup plan, you know, two single rebels against the dating scene.”

“I can’t drag you down with me.” Sam chuckles, but the halfhearted edge in his tone returns. “You should get yourself out there, have some fun. You never know when you’ll find your soulmate.”

But I’ve already found my soulmate. My heart sinks a little, resigned to the fact that Sam Doesn’t feel the same about me. I force a smile, keeping my tone upbeat. “Maybe I should.”

CHAPTER 2

***

Annie

The office is quiet when I arrive, the stillness broken only by the soft hum of the heating system as it fights off the morning chill. I’m the first one in, as always, savoring the solitude before the day’s chaos begins. Lights twinkle softly on the fresh Christmas tree tucked into the corner, filling the air with the crisp scent of pine.

I flick on the overhead lights, enjoying the festive holiday decor on the way to my desk. Tinsel drapes over cubicle walls, garlands stretch across the window tops, and red and white poinsettias perch in each window sill. It’s cozy, peaceful, and festive–the perfect start to an otherwise ordinary Monday. I settle into my chair and power up my computer, already tuning into the tasks I need to complete before the end of the year.

As the clock ticks toward nine, coworkers begin trickling in, filling the office with the sounds of laughter and conversation. I eavesdrop on snippets of their idle conversations of holiday plans—trips to visit family, last-minute shopping sprees, and extravagant New Year’s Eve parties. I’m content listening from the sidelines. Spending Christmas alone never bothered me before, but now, with Sam single this year, the idea of spending the holiday together seems more appealing. Maybe we can spend it together like in the old days—just the two of us, savoring the simple joy of each other’s company amidst the holiday cheer.

“Thought you might need a pick-me-up.” Julia, my boss, slides a to-go cup bearing my favorite coffee house logo onto my desk. She leans into my desk, casually perching herself on the corner. “You beat everyone into the office again, didn’t you?”

“Yeah, but I like coming in early.” I pop the lid off the cup, and steam wafts from the top. I inhale a deep breath, closing my eyes to enjoy the sweet, minty aroma. My favorite, peppermint mocha latte. “I so needed this. Thank you.”

“A little Christmas cheer never hurt anyone.” Julia’s kind eyes peek over the top of her cup as she glances around the office. “Looks like everyone’s excited about the holidays. What about you? Any big plans?”

I hesitate for a moment, swirling my coffee as I stall for time. “No, no travel plans. I’m keeping it low-key this year—just pajamas, old holiday movies, and good ole hot cocoa.” I shrug, trying to sound enthusiastic, but it rings hollow.

Julia’s expression softens. A hint of concern sparks in her eyes. “You’re not spending Christmas alone, are you?”

Her question catches me off guard, sending a surge of panic to my chest. In the past, I’ve buried myself in projects and deadlines during the holidays, finding comfort in the familiarity of work. Not to mention it’s eased the pinch of jealousy I’ve felt knowing Sam’s with some starlet, model, or his future baby momma.

My life isn’t pathetic, though I am a walking cliche—a poster child for struggling almost thirty-somethings with nothing to go home to except four walls filled with empty silence. There’s nothing shameful about living alone. Lots of people do so by choice. Sam for instance is giving up dating, not that it’ll last long. It never does. He says he needs the distraction. From work, I guess. That’s one thing that’s different about us. I bury myself in work to distract me from him. He buries himself in other women to forget about work.

Ewww. He dates, but I don’t have to picture it.

Julia stares at me with kind, patient eyes. Suddenly I see how my life might look through someone else’s lens—like work is the sum total of my life.

“Of course not. I forgot to mention my boyfriend. We’ll be spending the holiday together,” I blurt out, sidestepping the awkwardness. The words tumble out of my mouth before I can stop them. I force a bright smile and quickly dip my chin to take a sip of my latte.

Julia’s expression shifts to one of surprise and delight. “Really? That’s wonderful, Annie. I didn’t know you were seeing someone. What’s his name? I’d love to see a photo.”

And this is how tiny white lies turn into webs of deception. I fumble for my phone and quickly scroll through photos, landing on one of Sam and me at the German beer festival a few years ago. I hold the phone up, hoping Julia doesn’t notice the slight tremor in my hand.

“Here he is. Sam,” I say, trying to sound casual, but the high-pitched squeak in my voice is a dead giveaway. “He’s been so busy with work, but he’s taking a week off so we can spend the holiday together.”

“That sounds perfect.” Julia nods, her smile genuine as she examines the photo. “You know what you two need? A getaway. A friend of mine hosts a week-long couple’s retreat every Christmas. She had a cancellation last week that she hasn’t been able to fill on such short notice. You and Sam should come.”

Oh no, no, no.

“We couldn’t.” I shake my head as panic whips through me at breakneck speed. “We haven’t saved for anything so extravagant—”

“Nonsense. You haven’t taken a vacation since your last promotion,” Julia insists, her tone firm but encouraging. “The trip is on me. Consider it a gift for all your hard work.”

I open my mouth to protest, but Julia stops me before I can say a word.

“I won’t take no for an answer. It’s important to take a break and recharge, Annie. Plus, it’ll give us a chance to connect on a more personal level.”

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