Page 79 of Moonlit Temptation

Time stopped.

The world stopped.

My heart stopped.

No.

No.

It felt like a dull, rusted knife shoved in my chest. Backed by enough force to pierce my heart.

No one ever picked me.

No one ever stayed for me.

And Saint was no different.

You’re not worth it.

I wanted to scream, claw that indifferent expression off his face.

Instead, a weird calm settled over me as I heard my heart splinter, breaking into pieces and falling into the hollow depths of my stomach.

I stood tall, while on the inside, I was crumbling.

Saint did nothing but stare. Stared as he broke my heart into tiny pieces.

I was replaceable, interchangeable to him.

I was nothing. Nothing but a body to fuck.

We were just having sex, Mady. It wasn’t going to be anything but sex.

That dull knife was shoved deeper into my chest.

With one more long look, Saint turned on his heels and left the room without another word, leaving me alone to catch myself.

Part of me wanted to keep fighting, to run after him and make him take the words back in front of the party downstairs, but there was nothing left in me that cared.

It means London was fun, but it was a mistake.

As soon as the door clicked shut, I collapsed onto the floor, knees to chest and tears unshed.

You’re not worth it. Not worth losing everything I’ve built for myself here. Not worth losing my family.

I wanted to cry. Scream. Destroy everything in this room until it looked like the remains of the heart he just broke.

My biggest fear after sleeping with Saint was that I’d lose him. Never did I think I’d be filled with so much hatred toward him.

It came instantaneously.

The moment he shut the door, my heart closed around itself. Consumed with hate so visceral I tasted it on my tongue. Felt it burn behind the tears locked in my eyes.

It was funny, how someone could bring you joy until the moment they didn’t.

Everything felt like it was in quicksand. Descending slowly into an abyss with no exit.

I was sinking. Hate and hurt made a deadly cocktail. One I didn’t want to drink.

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