Page 97 of The Retreat

THIRTY-TWO

Owen

“How did you get so many followers in a few days?” I’m not surprised.

“It’s been three weeks.” Colin possesses a magnetism to him unlike anyone I’ve ever met.

I count in my head. “No. It can’t be past February!”

“It’s March.”

“What are days even? Time is made up to confuse me.” I point my spoon at him.

He opens his phone while leaning in to press his lips to my cheek. “Fuck the man and his time.”

I slip a hand around the back of his head, turning into his kiss. “This is why I love you.”

Colin smiles, turning off the video and throwing his phone down on the counter to kiss me harder. “Is it?”

“One of the many reasons,” I murmur as it dawns on me what I just said.

Did Colin notice? Did he care?

He keeps kissing me, and doesn’t seem to.

I control my breathing, pulling him against me. “Wait, did you say it’s March?”

“Yes,” he laughs. “The second.”

I freeze.

“What?” he asks, pulling back to look at me.

“The Pan American Championships are in less than a month as the Olympic qualifying period comes to a close.” I’ve secured a spot on the team, but I’m expected to place top four, and the pressure is eating me from the inside.

“You’re going to do great. Your training is off the charts. Everyone sees it.” He backs up and hops up to sit on the counter. “I’m going to post this. Okay?”

“Can I see it?” Did the video have me saying I love you in it?

“Sure, let me edit it real fast.” He does a few things on his phone, and then he flips it around, hitting play.

The scene replays, and I hear myself say, “This is why I love you.”

And Colin say, “Is it?”

Something flickers in his eyes. It’s amusement or enjoyment.

“Can I post it?” Colin asks.

“Of course.” I force a smile to my lips as my mind reels.

“I have to go to class. Are we still having dinner after practice?” He gathers his hair in his hands, tying it up.

“Yes, I made reservations.” I keep it together until he leaves, but the second he’s out the door, I’m back under the chaise lounge.

I love him. I’m falling in love with him. I didn’t know what I’ve been feeling until the words came out of my mouth, but the more I examine it, the clearer it becomes.

What the fuck is wrong with me? I skip my training and don’t have the stomach to eat the meals in the fridge. And the longer I stay under the chaise, the more I hate myself. I’ve been doing so well for months. This shouldn’t send me over the edge. What the fuck is wrong with me? What kind of moron can’t handle falling in love?

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