Page 27 of Secrets Within Us

He hummed back and chuckled, “Maybe a time or two before.”

That choice of words made me still as questions rose in my brain for the millionth time in the last week. “Have you been in a long-term relationship before?” My voice was steady but soft as I asked, braver with my back facing him, so he couldn’t see the fear on my face.

I guess part of me was afraid of him admitting he was in one with someone else presently, while another part of me was afraid he would dodge the question all together.

“Have you?” He asked, choosing the second option.

I tried not to let disappointment at his avoidance show, as I turned and rinsed my hair under the water, pulling his fingers from the tresses reluctantly.

When my head was tipped back, I opened my eyes and caught sight of the scowl between his eyes at my abrupt turn. I closed my eyes again to shut it out.

“No.” I stated truthfully, “I’ve never been seriously committed to anyone.”

“How is that possible?” He asked, stepping forward and dropping his forehead to mine, wrapping his large hands around the widest part of my hips, and pulling my chest to his stomach, letting the water cascade over both of our faces.

With a shrug, I let my fingertips explore the hard planes of his abs and sides as if I were blind, reading a braille story. “I’ve never found anyone worthy of something serious. I moved around a lot and kept to myself most of the time.”

He pulled back and looked down at me questioningly like he was trying to answer other questions with the answer I’d just given him.

Yeah, well, that’s a two-way street bucko.

“When was your last serious relationship?” I asked. Figuring his lack of answer last time was an affirmation that he’d been in one before.

His eyes darkened noticeably, and he let his hands fall from my hips as he grabbed the shampoo and started washing his own hair.

I put my hand on his arm, “I was going to do that for you, to repay the favor.” I smiled up at him, trying the adage you get more with sugar than spice.

“You can’t reach it, so I’ll get it.”

His voice was gruff and his movements were sharp as he lathered up his hair with his eyes closed. He worked it into his beard and continued to stay silent and closed off as I stupidly stood there watching as his walls grew around his heart like an impenetrable force keeping us apart.

How were we ever going to get past the emotional barriers if neither of us were willing to go first?

My heart ached as the weight of my secrets weighed down on my soul once again.

I wrung my hair out and stepped out of the stone shower quietly. As I stood on the mat on the floor in the bathroom, I grabbed a towel and quickly wrapped it around my body.

“Hey.” He said, popping his head into the entrance of the shower and looking for me. But I just walked out of the bathroom and went upstairs to find my clothes and put some sort of armor on over my naked body. “Hadley!” He called after me, but I ignored him.

The same way he ignored me when I was standing directly in front of him.

I was standing in the bedroom in a bra and panties when he walked up the stairs and stood silently, brooding with a towel around his waist and his fists on his hips.

“Why did you leave?” He asked.

“You were ignoring me. If you insist on shutting me out, I’m going to leave.” I said as I grabbed a shirt to pull on. He reached forward quickly and grabbed it from my hands and threw it over the railing to the living room. “What the hell?” I snapped, turning on him.

“I wasn’t ignoring you.” He replied sharply.

“Bullshit.” I retorted. “You weren’t answering any of my questions, either.”

His chest heaved dramatically as he looked down at me with his eyebrows knitted in the center, frustration radiated off his body. “So you just take off when you don’t get your way?”

“This isn’t about me getting my way, Kip! It’s about you, unwilling to share anything about your past, yet expecting me to share about mine!”

“You aren’t exactly an open book either, Hadley.” He huffed.

I didn’t bother to reply. We weren’t going to resolve anything at the moment. I might be twelve years younger than him, but I could tell in terms of emotional maturity, we were both fucking lacking.

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