Page 21 of I Met Him At The Library

I rushed toward the building's door and pushed it open, needing the cool spring air on my heated face. I breathed in hoping to calm my racing heart and cool the disappointment and jealousy roiling in my chest. Why the hell was I acting like this? What did it matter to me? We weren’t together. I had no claims over him. Maybe it was because he hadn’t mentioned having a girlfriend, which should always be the first thing a man mentions when talking to a woman.

Should it though? As a woman who could have a boyfriend, I would want him to be clear he was taken. But, if it was only a friendly conversation, no exchange of numbers, would it be necessary?

Members of different sexes could be friends without there being anything sexual. We were friendly, and I figured he would have at least mentioned he had a girlfriend. Some small tidbit or story where he would say, “my girlfriend.” Ugh!

“Okay, well have fun,” Ryan yelled as I hustled down the sidewalk.

I threw a wave over my shoulder but kept my gaze aimed straight ahead. Of course Ryan would have a girlfriend. He was fucking hot as hell. Stupid, stupid, stupid! How could I possibly think he wouldn’t? Or that he would be interested in me? Oh my god, I’d need to move. I couldn’t possibly listen to them having sex all the time. Wait, did he know about her night job?

Nope, it was none of my damn business. Mind your business, Emily.

Raldek recommended fighting her. Meanwhile, Tabitha chastised him for the recommendation. But, I wasn’t living in my fictional world, and the mating customs of Raldek’s alien race were a bit extreme for Earth and, well, real life.

I needed to let this go, we had a few friendly, maybe slightly flirty, conversations. I didn’t need to dwell on it. He obviously wasn’t interested in me at all, and I could let go of this stupid, silly, little crush. I had my books, both the ones I was writing and the ones I was reading. Book boyfriends were much better than real ones anyway.

As I browsed the aisles of Cornerstone Grocery, a sort of bummed feeling came over me. Like I’d told Meghan, several times, I wasn’t interested in dating anyone from Maple Creek. Well, anyone who wasn’t a tall handsome librarian. But, fuck, a part of me hated the loneliness, and I didn’t feel as lonely when I was hanging out with Ryan. He made butterflies take flight in my stomach. He was funny and easy to talk to.

Well, this sucks. I was grieving the loss of a relationship that never even started. Stupid, stupid, stupid.

Groaning internally, I grabbed a few items off the shelves and tried to shove my disappointment over Ryan out of my brain. It wasn’t until I reached the check out I noticed the majority of the items I grabbed were snacks or some sort of chocolate.

Elizabeth Thompson set her inspecting gaze on my items and then up at me with a bit of disappointment in her expression, but, thankfully, she didn’t say anything as she began scanning them. Elizabeth and Rose Hill were incredibly close so I was sure this grocery order would be discussed at what I could only assume were weekly “We’re better than everyone” meetings.

After grabbing my bags, I slowly walked back toward my apartment, hoping I wouldn’t run into Ryan again.

As I climbed the stairs, the upstairs neighbor I rarely bumped into bounded down the steps in all her thin and beautiful glory. Her deep blue eyes met mine, and she smiled sweetly.

“Oh hey, I wanted to apologize to you,” she said.

Caught off guard, I paused before blinking and saying, “What for?”

Please don’t apologize for having loud sex with a guy I’d had a crush on for the longest time.

“I didn’t realize how thin our walls were, and I’ve been blaring music. I’ll buy new headphones this weekend.”

“Oh it’s not a problem. No worries,” I said, relieved we weren’t about to have an awkward as fuck conversation about the other noises too.

“Have a good day,” She sang as she continued her perky bounce down the steps.

If I had an afternoon rendezvous like she had, maybe I’d have a little pep in my step too. I hated those jealous and slightly petty thoughts. I always felt like such a bitch when they’d pop into my head. I took a deep breath in and released it, trying to chase away this horrendous attitude I suddenly had.

Reminding myself that I was a girl’s girl, I continued up the steps to my door. Unlocking it while balancing my bags on one arm and hand, I pushed the door open, and stepped inside. Kicking the door shut, I set my bags of goodies on the table before turning back to the door and locking it.

I needed to nip this funk trying to take over my brain. Ryan wasn’t anything but a friend to me, even if we’d done some flirting. On no planet should I be feeling any type of way about him dating my upstairs neighbor.

Maybe a night out to get my mind off everything and getting away from the town would do me some good. It would certainly stop my mind from spiraling like it was starting to after the years of witnessing women being pitted against each other because of men.

Pulling my phone from my back pocket, I scrolled through my contacts and dialed Meghan’s number, before pressing the phone between my ear and shoulder.

“Shouldn’t you be writing right now?” Meghan answered.

“Yes, but I can’t concentrate, and I want to go out - but not here. Let's go to Fairwood somewhere.”

Fairwood was a slightly bigger town than ours and had more choices for places to drink. While neither of us would get drunk, since the town was about an hour away, we were far less likely to run into anyone from Maple Creek. It may also mean I’d get to meet someone, flirt, and remove any idea of Ryan and me from my head once and for all.

“Ooh. You know I’ll never pass up an opportunity when you actually want to go out.”

“Great, meet here at eight?”

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