Page 12 of Ablaze

I know very little about Sadie, but this letter leads me to believe that she had no idea what was coming. My parents at least gave me the knowledge and the tools to help save my life. I sit on the ground and think about everything that I’ve just found out. This girl has no idea what’s going on. Unless there’s some hidden message that I don’t understand, then I’ve travelled across the country to find a girl who is as clueless as I am. I don’t know how long I sit there thinking but I realize I have to figure this out.

I stand up and brush the dirt off my butt. I’m determined, now more than ever, to find Sadie before it gets dark. I’m so mad I could punch the next person I see in the face. I don’t know if it’s because I just lost the only hope I was holding on to or if I feel more confused than ever. I do know though, that I’m her only hope of surviving if she has no training or skills. I have to find her before darkness comes. People will be out in full force then, and I have no idea how long I have before Dome guards make their way toward us. That realization propels me to keep moving forward.

Sadie

I check my watch one more time. It’s been ten minutes, and I’ve given him double what he told me. I can’t wait any longer. I have to get moving. He’ll find me on the way to the island, and we will switch our bags. I have to trust that he’ll show up. He needs me right now as much as I need him. I haven’t travelled a lot during the daylight, and it makes me nervous. The fact that guards for the Dome are here makes me even more nervous.

The one thing I’ve learned while making my way to Utah, is that the Dome is hated by everyone in the west. People aren’t willing to go out of their way to help them unless it benefits them. If anybody sees me that is not paid by them, they aren’t going to give me up easily. I make my way out of the city streets being careful to stay out of the sunlight and out of the eyes of the guards. If I’m going to have any shot of making it out of here without getting caught, I’ve got to be slow and make wise movements. The heat slows me down even more.

As I make my way out of the city, I keep thinking about Jesse. I think about how it was so selfless of him to help me. He went into that bar knowing that Dome guards were there and knowing that he might not get back out. I silently pray as I walk that he’s made it out. It would be awful for him to get hurt just to help me. I keep looking for him as I walk, hoping that the next corner I turn he’ll be standing there waiting on me. I want him to be safe. He doesn’t deserve to get into my mess, a mess that I didn’t even know I had. I can’t understand why people from the Dome would be looking for me.

I try to remember every detail of the last few days. Why would George have sold me out to the Dome, and what does the Dome even want with me? It doesn’t make any sense. I keep walking, trying to get as far away as I can from the city center.

I’m weak from being sick, and the sun is making me feel worse. I’m dehydrated, and I feel like I’m going to pass out. I make it to the tree line beside the main road going to the island. I can’t go any further. I have to sit down and rest. The heat has literally worn me down. I take Jesse’s backpack off and set it beside me on the ground. I need to see if he has anything to drink or eat.. If not, I’ll have to keep moving until I find water. I’m sure at this point if he’s made it out, and is out in this miserable heat, he’s done the same with my bag.

I rest my back up against a tree and close my eyes. I listen to the sounds around me, hoping to hear Jesse’s footsteps. All I can hear is the wind. I feel like crying. I’m just so exhausted, and I keep thinking about how I trusted George. I pull the backpack closer and pull the zipper tab to open it. I feel bad for opening his bag, but he’d understand. If he’s out there with mine he’s welcome to open it.

I go through his bag, taking each item out so I can get through all of it. I find a few things to eat and one bottle of water. I take the lid off and smell the water. It has a hint of orange to it, so it looks like it’s already been given one of the pills. I take my chances and drink from the bottle. It’s so refreshing that I greedily drink more, knowing that I should save some of it for later. I even put some of the water on my face. I can tell my forehead is sunburned. As I sit there cooling off and eating one of the snacks, I absentmindedly start looking through the stuff I took out of the bag.

What catches my eye is the tattered black envelope tucked in between his clothing. I know those envelopes, having grown up with them. It makes me feel like I’m invading his privacy just seeing it. I think of the one my parents gave me that’s in my own bag. I leave the stack of clothes on the ground and repack the rest of the bag. Once I’ve got the rest of the contents back in the bag, I pull the envelope out from the clothing. I stare at the envelope, torn between wanting to open it and not wanting to invade his privacy. That’s the least I could do for him considering the danger he’s gone through for me.

My curiosity wins, however, and I pull the letter from the envelope and unfold it. I read the first few lines and stopped. His parents, just like mine, knew this was going to happen. They were prepared for it and apparently, they had prepared Jesse for it as well. I look up from the paper and scan the woods around me. I have this feeling I’m being watched. Maybe it’s because I’m reading his letter, and I know I shouldn’t be. I look back down at the letter and continue to read. The next few sentences send chills down my spine.

He was sent to protect a woman at Antelope Island. My mind scans everything I’ve learned about the island and what Jesse has said to me in the short time I’ve known him. I have so many questions and no answers to go with them. I know that my gut reaction is right about the island. It’ll be confirmed shortly once I get there. My parents and his parents wouldn’t have sent us out there in the middle of a disaster on a wild goose chase. There’s a reason for it, and I’m so close to finding it out. I read the letter one more time, then fold it up. I pick up the envelope, and a small square of paper falls out onto my lap.

I turn the blank square over, and my face is now staring back at me. It’s my ID photo, the same that the man in the woods was carrying. My heart is racing in my chest and my mind is reeling. Am I the girl his parents mention in the letter? Why does he have my photograph? Does he know who I am then? In a panic, I shove the letter and photograph back in the envelope and back into the backpack. I scramble to my feet and clean up the tracks I’ve made in the dirt. I have to get out of here. I need to get to the island.

My head is spinning. I feel as if I’m standing on the outside looking in through the glass at my own life. It all comes to me as I’m running through the brush beside the road. I don’t care how much noise I’m making. I have to get out of here. I’m the girl he came across the country looking for. I’m the girl that his parents told him to find. I’m the girl that is labeled important. As I run through the brush with these thoughts in my mind, I can feel the sting of tears creeping into my eyes.

I’m exhausted, and to find out this information with no real answers doesn’t help me in any way. I’m tired of running. I’m tired of fighting to survive each day. I’m so close but so far away from the island. It might as well be on the other side of the country. I stop running and try to catch my breath. I bend forward and place my hands on my knees, trying to take deep calming breaths. I suck the air through my lungs and can’t get myself to calm down. I think I’m having a panic attack.

I fall to the ground and lay with my face on the dirt. As I slip into unconsciousness, my thoughts drift, wondering how my parents could do this to me. How could they send me out into the world, knowing this was going to happen, and leave me all alone? I think of Jesse and know he’s out there… he has to be. He doesn’t seem like a guy who gives up. I think of his face and the look he gave me when we first met. Then it all goes black.

Jesse

The sun is on the horizon, and the air around me is becoming easier to breathe as the sky begins to grow darker. I’ve searched about half of this side of the woods and have had no luck. My estimate of her having a lead on me has brought me further out into the brush. I’m exhausted from not getting any rest. I haven’t slept now in 24 hours, and my adrenaline has worn off. My throat is parched, but I’m still moving. With every new step that I take, my faith in finding her fades a little bit more.

I don’t even know if she got out of the city, but I’m clinging to the fact that she had made it this far on her own. That’s even despite the fact that her parents gave her no real warning. At least my shit parents did that much. They at least gave me the skills to try to survive. I keep walking, looking for her. I stop every few yards and listen for any noises. Now that the sky is getting dark, more people will be out. If the Dome is still on the hunt for us, then they’ll be out here sooner rather than later.

I know that by covering the brush looking for Sadie, I’m also getting closer to the island. I don’t even want to think about what may await us there. I continue to walk for what feels like hours and as I go, the sky becomes black and speckled with white lights to guide me. It’s falling into darkness, and I’ve almost given up hope of finding her when I spot an awkward shape on the ground. The lump on the ground is about fifty feet in front of me. My heart skips a beat, and my palms begin to sweat. I think I’ve finally found her, and I feel dreadful thinking that she’s just lying on the ground.

I look around in the darkness then close my eyes, listening again for any sounds around me. It’s almost impossible not to just run to her, but I need to be cautious. This could be a trap. If any of the Dome has followed either one of us, we’re done for. There won’t be any second chances on escaping from them. I take a few seconds and open my ears. I can’t hear any noises and begin to move forward. As I get closer to the shape, I realize it is Sadie, and she’s lying face down on the dirt in an unnatural pose. A rush of overwhelming terror fills my chest as I instantly think the worst. I rush to her side, reach down and feel for a pulse at her neck. She’s alive and breathing! I feel a little relief. I would never forgive myself if something happened to her while she was out of my sight.

I put my hand on her shoulder and gently try to nudge her awake. It takes a few tries until she begins to stir. I take what little water I have and splash some on her face. She seems in a fog, and I begin to wonder if George was drugging her to keep easier tabs on her until he could get the Dome into town. I help her sit up, and it takes a minute for her to open her eyes. She looks around at her surroundings like she’s momentarily forgotten where she is. When our eyes meet, she smacks my hand off her shoulder.

My reaction is to grab my stinging hand and rub it. I wasn’t expecting that. She pushes back away from me on the ground and scrambles to get to her feet. I can see the dust falling back to the ground with what little light is left. Her face is pale white, and she’s looking at me with eyes as big as saucers. I try to reassure her and when that doesn’t work, I change my tone. I stand up so we will be face to face.

“What’s wrong? Did someone hurt you? Are you okay?” I ask, confused. Standing there waiting for a response, I continue to rub my hand. It’s no longer feeling the instant sting of the hit, but it gives me something to do with my hands. I’m frustrated and confused, and I know my tone of voice gives away exactly how I’m feeling.

Sadie doesn’t move from where she’s standing, and she isn’t speaking. Quickly, she takes off my backpack and throws it at my feet. The dust rises and makes me cough. I have to wave it out of my face. I ask her another question, “What’s wrong with you?”

She echoes me with, “What’s wrong with me?” She gives a shrill laugh. She’s filled with anger. Apparently, we’ve both had a very bad day. “I’ll tell you what’s wrong with me!” she yells. “You know exactly who I am, and I only know the lies you’ve told me.”

My heart sinks. I thought she was going to tell me something awful. We’ve committed the same sin and gone through each other’s bags. She knows my secrets and knows that I’ve been looking for her. I’ve failed in my mission to my parents and myself. The only thing I can do to keep her near me is come clean. I’ll have to tell her everything that I know. It’s the only way.

“Sadie, I’m sorry.” As I speak the words, she’s already turning and walking from me. “I mean it! You read the letter. I was instructed not to let you know. I’m not here to harm you. I’m here to do nothing but help you!” She continues walking away from me. “Why do you think I just risked my life getting your bag? I wouldn’t do that for just anyone. You’re special. My parents told me so!”

It does no good. She just keeps walking. I plead with her, something that I’m not accustomed to doing for anything or anyone. “Please! Just listen to me. Don’t walk away from me!” That does the trick because she stops walking and slowly turns around to look at me.