Page 66 of His Bittersweet Regret

“I stopped trying to breastfeed at all and just switched completely over to formula. Without all the fussing and struggle, he’s flourishing. I might be a failure, but he shouldn’t have to suffer for it.”

“You’re not even close to being a failure. Look what we did.” I quickly corrected myself, because I’d only had a part in his creation. Everything else was down to Opal. “What you did! You made sure he came out healthy and happy even though you had a horrible time throughout your pregnancy. I think you deserve a damn award for it.”

I could see her blush, while keeping my eyes downcast for the most part, so as not to embarrass her further. It hurt to know that she thought of herself as a failure for anything. The woman was probably one of the strongest people I knew. She spat in the face of adversity and carried on like nothing ever happened.

“I meant what I said, if you want to take a nap, I have him.”

She glanced over at me and then shrugged her shoulders. “It would be weird to try to sleep on the couch while you’re here.”

“Why? I’ve slept here before.”

“Yes, but it’s the middle of the day and you’ll have nothing else to do and nowhere else to sit while I try to dream and drool all over my pillow.

“I see. So, you’re afraid I’ll watch you while you sleep?”

She shrugged. “Can we just leave it at the fact that it would be weird?” Opal handed me the freshly made bottle, and despite knowing she would never give me something that was a temperature that would hurt our son, I still tested it out on my wrist to be sure. “I’m glad you’re extra cautious with him.”

“I know you would never give me something that wasn’t just right, but I was reading about potential hot pockets of milk in bottles and…”

Opal giggled. “Those generally occur when people try to microwave bottles. I never do that.” She went back to the sink and started washing out the saucepan she’d just used.

“Don’t know how you could ever consider yourself a failure when you go the extra mile for everything.”

“My body didn’t work the way it was supposed to,” she admitted sadly.

“Opal, you know that happens to lots of women, right?”

“Yeah, but if we were living back in the olden days, our baby might starve if we couldn’t find a wet nurse to help him out.”

“It’s a good thing we’re not living in the olden days then.” I laughed as I said it because sometimes, Opal could be just as weird as her mother. It was endearing most of the time. When she glanced at the clock on the wall for the fourth time, there was no holding back my curiosity.

“Do you have somewhere to be?”

“Sorry, it’s just that I have a ride coming to get us at two, so that I can go to the store and grab some more formula. He goes through a lot of it.”

“I could take you. I’m here and the truck is just outside.”

“Actually, would you mind staying here with him and giving me a few minutes to shop without Austin? I haven’t been able to go anywhere by myself, and could use a bit of a break.”

“Sure.” I carefully leaned over while cradling Austin in one arm and dug my wallet out of my pocket while anchoring his bottle with my chin. It was probably a sight to see, considering Opal was standing across the room chuckling at me.

“Here,” I called out to her as I tossed my wallet onto the little coffee table in front of her sofa. Then I dug out the keys to my truck from another pocket. “Take the truck, and please, use my credit card for whatever he needs, or anything you need, for that matter.”

“I don’t want your money,” she argued.

“Opal, he’s my son, too. It’s my responsibility to take care of him and we haven’t set up any kind of child support or whatever. Save yourself a few bucks and use my money.”

She relented and grabbed my card, but left my keys. Her phone beeped with an incoming text and she smiled down at it as she read. “My ride is here. Call if you need me to come back.” Just as quickly as she looked at the text, the woman was out the door. It took a couple minutes for me to realize she hadn’t taken the truck keys. Then, it hit me, she said she had a ride coming to get them.

Once I finished feeding, burping, changing my son, and laying him back in his crib, I pulled out my phone to text my younger brother.

Marsh: Did you by chance come pick Opal up?

Ryker: No. I thought you were heading to her place and gave her the heads up in a text, like you asked.

Marsh: She left me with Austin while she went to the store. Said she had a ride lined up.

Ryker: Probably Joe.

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