Page 59 of His Bittersweet Regret

“We were supposed to be married before we had kids. The last name the baby got should never have been a question in my mind,” I sobbed out almost unintelligibly.

“Fuck,” he hissed low, under his breath. “Opal, there aren’t enough apologies in the world to undo the damage I caused us. I’m so damn sorry, baby. If you want him to have your name…” he left the offer hanging there in the room between us as I shook my head.

“It’s all lost. My son’s name won’t ever match mine. I’ll have to watch him interact with a stepmother eventually, and have to see you with more women. I wish I could just disappear,” I admitted. It was safe to say that I was feeling my lowest.

“Oh!” A feminine voice called out in distress from the door. I looked up to see Marsh’s mom and Ryker standing there. Ryker looked angry enough to kill his brother on the spot. Kathy only had sad eyes for me, though. “Sweetheart, it’s hard after you give birth. Your emotions are all over the place. I promise, that feeling will pass.”

“How would you know? You were happily married when Jimmy came along and the rest of the boys too. You have no clue what it’s like to have a space built in between you and your child because there was a question of whose last name to use and the decision was made for you while you were resting after giving birth.”

“Tell me you didn’t,” Marsh’s mother hissed at him.

“I thought that was what we agreed to,” he admitted, looking sheepish under his mother’s scornful glare.

“We agreed to Austin Jason. I wasn’t sure about what to do with his last name.”

It was Marsh’s turn to give me the same look his mother had just landed on him. “I think you’re just punishing me because of Gabby.”

“Gabby?” Kathy asked. “Who is Gabby?”

“Cramer sent me pictures of your son, and all his women, every time he went on a date. Did you know that?” The color drained from Kathy’s face. “The last one he sent, before I finally had enough and blocked him, was of Marsh and Gabby making out. Marsh had a handful of her breast. When they rolled me into labor and delivery, guess who my nurse was?”

Kathy gasped and turned to her son, the disappointment on her face was clear. The loathing rolling off Ryker for his brother grew to suffocating levels. “What were you thinking?”

“I wasn’t aware that my dating life was being sent to her in vivid pictures,” Marsh spat out at his mother. “That was something I only learned today, and it will be dealt with later. My son’s birth took precedence over that, for good reason.”

“There are so many things I want to say to you, Son. Unfortunately, we can’t change the past, so it’s pointless to say them.” Kathy turned to me. “I understand that would have been incredibly hard to handle, especially today of all days. Opal, it is all in the past, though.”

I laughed quietly. “It’s only the past until it gets shoved in your face at the worst time all over again, Kathy. Those pictures are burned into my mind. I can’t even unsee them.”

“I hate this for both of you,” she admitted. “This isn’t the time or place to hash anything out. I came to meet my grandson.” Kathy turned her back on me and moved to the bassinet that was tucked into the corner of the room between the end of my bed and the wall. “Can I hold him?”

I didn’t want her to. I glanced over at Ryker, and knew there was someone else who deserved to meet my son more than his grandmother.

“Actually, I would very much like it if Ryker was the first to hold him. He was there with me during so many of my doctor visits and just to help me out whenever he could. He deserves to meet his nephew before anyone else.”

Ryker beamed at me. “I promise, I’ll be careful with him.”

“I know you will,” I told him. I thought Kathy might be angry with me for shutting her out from being the first, but the pride in her watery eyes as she took in her youngest son while he gently picked up my son, told me that she didn’t find fault in my decision.

“He’s so tiny,” Ryker said reverently as he looked down at his nephew. “Hey Aus, I’m your Uncle Ry. We’re going to be best buddies, little man.”

I was so enraptured with the sight of Ryker holding my son that I didn’t even notice when Marsh shifted and kneeled beside the head of my bed. My hand was wrapped in his before I noticed. “That was really cool of you,” he whispered. “Ryker deserved that honor.”

“I know he did.”

“Ryk?” Marsh called out. His brother lifted his eyes for a moment, giving Marsh his attention. “Thank you for being a better man than I ever was, especially since Opal needed you.”

Ryker nodded his head and then shifted his attention back to his nephew.

24

Marsh

“Marshal, can I speak to you in the hall for a moment?” My mother asked, after she got her turn to hold Austin.

“Are you good?” I asked Opal. She was sitting up, holding our son, and feeding him a bottle. Her milk hadn’t come in yet and she was afraid that our son would starve if he didn’t get something to eat. The nurses had laughed at her and brushed away her concerns, but honestly, I felt the same way.

“What’s up?” I asked as we left the room and shut the door to give us some privacy.

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