Page 29 of His Bittersweet Regret

After he left, I grabbed my beat up old acoustic guitar from the corner and sat down with it. I turned my phone on and logged into my channel, determined to sing an upbeat song for the first time in months. Only I sat there and stared at the camera for a few minutes before I said, “Sometimes, life just plain sucks. This is for everyone else who is stuck in a rut, right along with me.”

I started strumming a slowed down, softer version of The Downfall of Us All by A Day to Remember. It didn’t quite encompass what I was feeling, but I could identify with the ‘life being turned upside down’ part. Plus, Marsh had been right. He was happier without me. It was my turn to accept that I’d been wrong about us, and learn to be happy without him too.

14

Marsh

“What do you mean, she doesn’t live here anymore? I just saw her here two days ago.”

Gary was getting on my last nerve with his gatekeeper bullshit. I understood he was looking out for my girl, but dammit, I was trying to fix things.

“I meant what I said. She told me she couldn’t afford the place on her own and that she had to get something else. I tried to work something out with her,” he sighed. “But with all the added doctor bills, and things she needs for the baby, money’s just too tight for her to hang onto this place. Damn shame too because I don’t know too many other rentals available for much cheaper. Not for the space she needs for the baby and her.”

“I paid the rent up when I left,” I told him, unable to conceptualize her not being able to afford zero dollars.

“Son, you paid for six months. That six months was up two days ago.”

“Son of a bitch,” I muttered to myself. Hadn’t I just been thinking that the six months were nearly up and that I could go get my girl back? That was before she saw proof that I’d been with another woman though. Fuck! Fuck! Fuck!

“Hey handsome, finally come to your senses?” Monica called out from across the street. I ignored her and continued staring Gary down.

“Ah, ghosting another girl you got involved with, huh?”

“I never ghosted Opal. She blocked me on the phone.”

“Did you forget where she lived?” Before I could answer his stupid question, he shook his head. “Nah, couldn’t have, because here you are. Six months too late to do anything about the mess you made.”

“Gary, if you know where she is, I need to know. She’s carrying my baby.”

“Nice of you to finally acknowledge that after she’s been struggling with everything on her own all this time.”

“I just found out two fucking days ago!” I shouted at him. That must have been a shock because his jaw actually dropped so far I thought it might hit the stoop he was perched on.

“You’re seriously trying to tell me, that in a town this small, when your little brother has been a nuisance around here for months, that you had no clue Opal was with child?”

“My little brother stopped talking to me when I left Opal,” I admitted. “And yes, that’s exactly what I’m telling you.”

“She didn’t leave a forwarding address,” Gary informed me. “The moving company she used is that one with the green and yellow trucks.”

“Home to Home?” I asked.

His shoulders bounced in answer. “Maybe that’s the one. They probably can’t tell you anything either, but might be worth a try. You could always ask that little brother of yours. I’m sure he knows. He seems to be thick as thieves with Opal these days. That’s a good boy looking out for his nephew’s momma when no one else will.”

“Son of a bitch,” I muttered as I walked away from Gary’s venomous truths. He knew how to hit a man right where it hurt.

I tried the moving company. They wouldn’t tell me a fucking thing. In fact, the owner threatened to dig a hole out back and put me in it if I tried to bother him for client information again, especially that specific client. I could say one thing for Opal, she earned people’s loyalty wherever she went. It wasn’t lost on me that I hadn’t given her the same loyalty that total strangers were capable of.

“What are you doing here?” My little brother asked as he came into Mom and Dad’s house after school let out.

“Came here to talk to you.”

“Wasted trip then, if you ask me.”

There was that loyalty again. Not that Opal didn’t deserve every bit of it, but damn if it wasn’t making things impossible for me.

“Did you know Opal moved?”

“I know she didn’t have a damn choice but to do so,” he threw back at me with an air of accusation.

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