Page 26 of Letters to Lily

“Sooo… we’re waiting to hear your news.”

I pulled one of the three sonogram images that I had been given earlier that day out and slid it across the table to Brad. He studied it for a minute, and I could tell when he finally saw the words across the top. No way was I giving him credit for seeing the truth in a sonogram that neither Kristin nor myself saw.

“This is great news, Sasha!” His grin grew even wider on his face as Kristin, looking skeptical, asked the question I’m sure the rest of us were wondering.

“Do you even know…”

He cut her off before she could finish. “Do you have a name for her yet?”

Kristin’s jaw dropped as she muttered, “How?”

“Well,” he started as he held up the picture. “There’s really nothing dangling here between the legs. I’m no expert, but unless your boy has one hell of a tuck going on…” He was laughing now, as was Mal. I just narrowed my eyes at him, knowing what actually clued him in. “Okay, fine. I only realized what I was looking at after I saw these words up here,” he pointed to the three little words stating, “I’m a girl!”

Kristin poked her lip out in a pout. “Cheater,” she huffed.

“Aw, come on Kris, cut the guy some slack when he’s trying to impress…” Mal cut his words off, looking rather guilty then. It did not go unnoticed that Brad’s cheeks and the tips of his ears flushed with color at his roommate’s faux pas. “Ow,” Mal whined after Kristin apparently hit him under the table for his idiot move. “Sorry.”

“So, do you?” Kristin swooped in trying to save both Brad and me from the embarrassment of his crush being revealed. It was a horribly kept secret, considering I already suspected. I hoped he was just genuinely super nice, and I was reading too much into things, but honestly, I was concerned that I had another Kade situation brewing. I didn’t have the feelings for him that I’d always had for Kaden, but that didn’t mean he wasn’t turning into my new male best friend – one who had feelings for me. They were feelings that I was not capable of returning to him though. I wasn’t sure if I ever would be, and that meant I had to be extra careful not to encourage more than just a friendship between the two of us.

“Do I what, Kris?” I asked, remembering that a question had been asked of me.

“Have a name picked out?”

“Oh, yes, I do.” I smiled, and only offered up her first name. “It’s Lily,” I offered up quietly, not giving her full name, just the first.

“Oh, Sash,” Kristin huffed out before hopping up and coming to give me a hug. Even though she had been around back then, we hadn’t been close friends the way we were in high school, so she didn’t know first-hand what that Valentine’s Day had meant to me. I did however tell her, repeatedly, over the years the story of the most epic gift ever given. Actually, when the prom night fiasco occurred, I remember asking her how a boy who was so thoughtful in middle school could have been so out of touch with nice gestures on the most important day of high school for a girl.

“I’m assuming the name has special meaning?” Brad asked quietly.

I very gently pushed Kristin away so she would go sit down before she made me cry again. I didn’t want to shed anymore tears, especially not in front of Mal and Brad. I’d broken down around them enough. Mal always freaked out and took off as quickly as possible, but Brad stuck around each time and allowed me to make a mess of him as he held me while my body expelled fresh tears, snot, and emotions all over his shirts.

“Um, yeah, there is, but it’s a story for another day.”

Brad simply nodded, accepting that I would explain in my own time. He probably understood by now that I didn’t want to break down in front of him again. Poor guy. “So, what about a middle name? Is there one?” He asked.

“Yes, but I’m going to keep that a secret until I send out birth announcements.” I smiled to let them all know it wasn’t a bad thing; just something I needed to do for me.

“But you’re going to tell me as soon as they leave, right?” Kristin was pouting again. “I’m her auntie, I deserve to know!” I just laughed at Kristin’s attempts to get the information.

“We’ll see.”

Chapter 12

Aug. 5

I was coming out of the registrar’s office after having to fix a few problems with my reinstatement when I heard my name being yelled from not too far away. “Holy shit, bro, I thought the world finally swallowed you up whole last semester. Sasha didn’t even know what happened to your sorry ass!” Andy Walker took a minute to catch up to me and then gave me a quick manly hug before settling back and waiting for me to fill in the blanks. Sadly, I was stuck on the mention of Sasha’s name.

“Yeah, ended up having fires to put out in the family. It took me out of town for a few months.”

“Dude, I’m not sure what went down with you and Sash, but she was destroyed last semester. I didn’t realize it was about you until I asked where in the hell you’d been and she said she wished she knew, broke down crying, and ran off.” Andy looked pained just recounting the experience.

“There was a huge mess that happened with my phone, and I guess hers too, at the time. We fucking lost touch in the middle of my family drama.” I scrubbed my hand down my face as I recounted the simplest version of our story.

“Damn, that’s a bad situation. Hope everything worked out with your family though.” I didn’t miss the undertone. He hoped fixing my family drama had been worth losing the girl. Andy, as much as I liked him, had always been one of the idiots in high school that I kept having to run off from Sasha, because even if she hadn’t ever been into me he was not good enough for her. “Maybe you’ll see her around and be able to fix that shit. Although, her new boyfriend might have something to say about that.”

“New boyfriend?” I asked.

He actually looked elated to be telling me this. “Yeah, she’s always with some dude these days when she’s not with Kristin. Tall dude, about your height. He has dark hair, built pretty big. He’s on the football team, or maybe basketball, I don’t know. I’ve seen him doing workouts in the team gyms, so he must be on one or the other. He’s new around town though because he didn’t go to high school with us.”

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