Page 49 of Revived

“Honestly, I’m not entirely sure.”

Deacon blew out a breath and motioned me inside. “Shut the door, please.” He tacked on the ‘please’ to be polite, but his words were an unmistakable order. Once the door was secured and my back to it, the man slid his imposing figure onto a beat-up leather couch. “I’m going to make this simple for the both of us. You’re going to ask what it would take to get out of your contract.” I didn’t respond so he continued. “I’m going to tell you that there’s nothing short of death or severe injury that could make that happen. I made a concession to bring you on, Melanie. We don’t normally have nurses of Nurse Practitioners join us for a full tour. There are emergency responders that get hired on per each venue, for the night, but they never travel with us.”

That wasn’t news to me, Gabe had told me as much, but he said they were changing things up a bit this time because there were far too many times that they wished they had someone on hand at odd times. I kept quiet about that though and waited.

“The thing is, you’ve proved that Gabe was right. The tour has gone off far smoother with you here than if you were gone. You’ve helped a bandmate’s son, kept people in better overall shape by sharing Chevy’s physical therapy routine as an exercise plan for everyone who wanted, you’ve confirmed a pregnancy and helped get that person prepared for what’s to come, and just last night you put several stitches in a one of the road crew’s unmentionable places after he got himself bitten. Do you know what the headlines would have looked like this morning if we’d had to take him to the hospital? It’s bad enough that security threw the woman out last night before I could deal with her. I think that’s a problem that will come back to bite the tour in the ass. No pun intended there. So, no, I won’t release you from your contract. You’ve proven yourself invaluable.”

I nodded my head. “What I will do is have Ev send you a copy of the schedule for certain members of Valhalla Rising. If you know where a certain person is, it will be easier to avoid them, then we can all carry on as one big, happy, touring family. Besides, you need me to sign off at the end of this thing so that I can recommend you to another employer.”

He sat looking at me while I contemplated every word. “Thank you,” I told him. “The schedule will be plenty helpful.”

“Good. I didn’t think you looked like the type who would quit just because things weren’t going your way.”

“I’m not. I simply do not want to make anyone else here uncomfortable.”

“Mel, I’m going to be honest with you, everyone here is rooting for you. Most people who heard a little about what down last night, have already given Gabe shit for disrespecting you that way. And, if we’re being honest, I think the only person who would be uncomfortable in any way is you, for having to face him after he was a colossal idiot.” His grin told me he was trying to lighten the mood while speaking the truth.

“I just think it’s for the best. I knew better from the beginning, even asked him to add what amounted to a no fraternization clause into my work contract.”

Deacon snapped his fingers. “Why didn’t I think of that?” He asked aloud. Then he laughed. “Oh yeah, because no one ever adheres to those things and the only way they’re useful is if you want to prove something happened so you can get rid of a troublesome employee. I find them distasteful because I don’t want to be in anyone’s bedroom business any more than I’m already forced to when stupid musicians make ridiculous decisions that end up being a problem for everyone.”

I cringed at the thought he saw me as someone’s stupid decision. “I’m sorry,” I mumbled.

“Don’t be. We all saw this coming.” That felt a little like a slap to me. “Not the fallout, Melanie, but we all saw the attraction between the two of you. It’s hard to miss. It’s just damn unfortunate that this world,” he raised his hands to indicate the rock star world we were currently embedded in, “skews people’s vision. I hope you keep that in mind, moving forward. What he thought he saw, it’s something that he’s used to from the people in this industry and those who live on the sidelines of it.” I started to speak, but he refused to let me. “I know, it’s not an excuse but just like I’m sure you have baggage that dictates how you react to situations at this stage in your life, so does Gabe.”

There was nothing else I could do but nod my head in agreement. He wasn’t wrong. That didn’t mean jumping back into something with a man who was still hung up on his ex and who would aim to hurt someone first, rather than understand, was going to happen. “The schedule will be very helpful,” was all I managed.

“I’m going to be away, working with some other assholes who can’t seem to get their shit together. Ev is taking over while I’m gone. If you need anything, you see her. I promise you, she’ll take your back if anyone is bothering you. She’s been there before and knows exactly how it feels to get hit with both the negatives and positives of dating a musician.” Deacon winked at me then. “Now, get out of here before my appointment shows up. I’m fairly certain you don’t want to be here for that one.”

“Thanks,” I told him as I scurried out and took the straightest line back to the busses that I could with my head down and earbuds in. They weren’t actually connected to my cell phone. I simply didn’t mind doing whatever it took to avoid having to talk to people just yet. Unfortunately, that didn’t quite work out. Just before I hopped on the bus, a hand reached out and grabbed hold of my arm, near my elbow.

“Mel, we need to talk. I’m sorry,” he started to say before I ripped my arm away from him. Gabe looked like absolute shit. His eyes were red-rimmed, he still hadn’t shaved this morning, and I was pretty sure he was still wearing last night’s clothes which smelled like a brewery exploded all over them. “Please, let me apologize,” he begged.

“Unless you’re bleeding to death, I don’t want you near me right now.” That was all I could manage before I ran up the bus steps and closed the door behind me. I turned to the driver who was readying us to take off for the day. “If there’s a way to lock him out, please do that.”

“Gabe’s in the shitter, huh?” I glared at the man for a moment.

“I guess you’re the only one who didn’t hear about all the drama.”

He chuckled. “Honey, drama is the fuel that keeps this circus on turning wheels from stop to stop.”

“That’s not very comforting.”

He gave an indifferent heft of his shoulder to match the expression on his face. “Doesn’t make it any less true.”

I guess that was part of what was left for me to learn in life. Just because I didn’t want something to be true, didn’t mean that it wouldn’t end up crushing my life. No. That happened once before. I wasn’t going to allow another man to dictate my happiness. Things needed to change, and while I might be stuck on this bus and tour for another few months, there were things that I could throw myself into, learn, and come out the better for. It just so happened that one of those things was now out of the question, for good.

17 – Band-Aids & Bullet Holes

Two weeks. Nine shows. I only managed to catch a few quick glimpses of Mel before she’d disappear from sight again. It was like she knew my schedule better than I did and more importantly, how to avoid me as a result.

There had to be a way to get her to talk to me again, so that I could explain. I laughed at myself then. Explain what? How the fuck was I supposed to explain away my rash response, or the fact that the worst case scenario is the one I pinned on her to cause that reaction in the first place. Mel was different.

“Is it another ‘I spotted Mel’ so I’m going to be a little bitch day? Or are you finally going to put that brain of yours to work and come up with a plan to win her back?”

“John, how the hell do I even start to do that?”

“Well, what have you done so far?”

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