Page 29 of A Twist of Fate

Zeke just laughed at us as he stood. “You two ready?” He glanced at his watch. “I need to be back for an appointment in a few.”

Walking through the doors of Permanent Marks again felt like coming home, even if my nerves were wreaking havoc, making it feel as though iron butterflies swarmed inside my belly. Those butterflies were each a worry I had about seeing Ever again. Would she hate me? Would she blame me? Would she want me gone? There were so many questions and each one was a heavy burden on my soul as I stepped through the doors to a space I once considered my home. It was where almost all the people I loved in the world were on a regular basis.

“Yo! Temp!” Sully called out and watched as a sour-faced woman in her upper twenties peered at the man who had bellowed out to get her attention. He tipped his head toward me. “Your services are no longer necessary here,” he told her without a hint of warmth.

“Oh my God! Sully, I can’t believe you just did that!” My mouth was agape. I had never known the man to be so rude to anyone.

“You know what? Thank fuck, because you assholes have managed to get on my last nerve. The only one of you worth a shit is Kane,” she taunted back before glancing over her shoulder and looking for the man in question.

“If you didn’t scare away half of our customers, we might have liked you more,” Sully returned before dipping down the little aisle that separated the few stations allotted for each artist.

I walked over to the desk. “Sorry,” I managed to get out. Not that the woman looked like she cared about what I had to say as she reached down behind the counter to grab her purse. “My time off is at an end. I didn’t realize…” I started to explain myself, feeling guilty for ousting the woman from the job she’d held for the past few months.

She held her hand palm up in front of my face. “I don’t give a shit, Vamperella.” With that, she stormed past and walked right out the door, leaving me flabbergasted at the front counter.

“Now, you see why we missed you so much,” Sully called out.

“Was she like that every day?”

“From day one,” Zeke informed me.

“Why did you keep her on then?”

“We were saving a spot for you, honey. Couldn’t very well get a replacement we would like and have a hard time letting go.”

My heart stumbled in my chest with those words. I didn’t hold back then either. I flung myself at Zeke and wrapped my arms around him. “I missed you so much!”

“We’ve been here waiting and missing you too. Welcome back, Gretchen!” When Zeke released me from his hug, the rest of the guys from the shop were there to take his place. Sully hugged me and whispered in my ear, “Aren’t you glad I let you have the mints anyway?”

His teasing was just the thing to break the tension in the room. I playfully punched him in the stomach and he moved away to make room for someone else. Kane’s sapphire eyes penetrated deep as he moved in for his hug. “Been lost here without you,” he whispered into my hair. I let the warmth of his embrace engulf me. I’d missed thi, giant of a man the most. Granted, I used to have a huge crush on him prior to falling for Toby, so I supposed he was the easiest one to miss. Having been hyper aware of his every move in the studio forever when he never noticed me in that way was something of a habit even long after I fell for Toby.

I was sort of ashamed to admit that part, but I had been up front with Toby about my previous infatuation with Kane. He had never worried over it. When I questioned why he wasn’t his answer had played over in my head so many times I could still hear the way he said it. “I’m not concerned because you’ve been working there for years. It’s his loss that he never saw you as more, but me being jealous that you wanted something from him he never gave would cause a rift in a friendship that is important to you. It’d be a pain in the ass for you to go to the job you love, and my job as your man is to make your life as easy and happy as possible. I’m not bothered that you used to crush on Kane. Why would I be? You told me about it, and didn’t hide it. That’s all I ever ask. Honesty is everything. Jealousy has no place in an honest relationship, because there’s no need for it.”

Hearing those words play out again in my head as I hugged Kane unleashed more of those iron butterflies in my stomach. I missed Toby so much, but I had been missing Kane all these months too. Sully and Zeke, even Ever had all been absent from my life – by own choosing – and it was time to remedy that, because what I hadn’t realized was that I had mourned the fact that they weren’t in my life. Maybe not the same way I had with Toby and our baby, but them being gone was still a loss. I couldn’t believe that I had only just realized that I didn’t have to feel their loss. They were still here, and they wanted to be there for me as I healed. I was a fool to stay away so long.

I saw Ever hovering toward the back of the shop, watching the reunion I was having with the guys. She seemed torn over whether to come closer or stay away. I nodded my head at her and looked away. It was the best I could do. My emotions weren’t ready to face her just yet. One day soon. Maybe. If the butterflies ever stopped slicing my insides to pieces, maybe I could find the courage to face my past so I could truly move on with my future.

“You back for good now?” Kane asked.

“I don’t know. I’m back. Let’s see how things go,” I told him as I glanced toward the back where Ever had gone.

“Are you mad at her or worried about how she feels?”

“I don’t even know how I feel most days. You would think I could have figured it out by now. It’s been months. Half a year, and here I am, still unable to process everything.”

“Whose time frame are you working with in there?”

“Kane,” I whined. “How the hell should I know?”

“It’s just you, G. When you feel you’re ready, that’s when you will be ready to move past each new hurdle, and not before. It’s not a race. Healing takes time, and the amount of time it takes is different for everyone.” His eyes roamed the length me – what length there was anyway. “What’s up with all this?”

“All this?”

“Yeah, this is not the way you used to look,” he commented.

“I’m not the same person who used to look that way.” I shrugged my shoulders and stowed my mini backpack behind the counter. Kane reached out and pulled some of my almost white-blond hair between his fingertips.

“Change can be good, G. Do what you need to.” He leaned in, smelling of salty, fresh ocean air and leather, as he planted a kiss to my forehead. “Really glad to have you back home, G,” he whispered against my skin before pulling back and walking away.

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