Page 11 of The Princess & the Prospect

I hung my head, ashamed of myself. He was right. Deck was right. I’d done far worse to Anna than she deserved. In the big scheme of things her fuck up was looking like an explainable blip while mine would probably prove devastating to any future we could have had, even as friends raising a kid together. Finally, I glanced up to him with pleading eyes. “Is she okay?”

“She’s safe, but no, she’s not okay. That girl is in a world of pain and she doesn’t even blame you. Which is what makes the whole thing complete shit, by the way. She blames herself in some crazy ‘original sin’ theory. She screwed up, so everything bad that follows is essentially her fault in her eyes.”

“Fuck!” I hissed out

Merc started messaging someone with his phone for a few minutes before glancing back over at me. “You gonna set her up at your place?” I nodded. That was the plan all along, if only I hadn’t stupidly stopped in the clubhouse to try to clear my warped brain from the layers of cobwebs. I just hadn’t been able to see my situation for what it had been instead of what I’d made it out to be.

“You have a room to use here if you need it, but I gotta tell you… If you want any kind of relationship with her, not coming home at night shouldn’t be an option you choose after what she saw last night.”

“I won’t be staying here unless she wants me to,” I informed him.

“My advice?” I nodded, giving him the go-ahead to continue with it. “Even if she wants you to, stay at home, on the couch if you need to. She might not see the gesture for what it is right away, but eventually she will and that beats the shit out of how she’ll feel alternatively if she has to wonder what you’re up to while staying here.”

“Assuming she’ll even care after what I’ve already put her through.”

“She’s young, pregnant, hormonal, and has had eyes for you before. She’ll care,” Merc assured me. At least, he tried to do so. I wasn’t sure I was buying what he was selling at this point. I’d fucked up some kind of bad. I sat there absorbing everything before he finally tapped on his desk to get my attention. “Now, go get the girl and take her home.”

When I arrived at Merc’s house the first thing I noticed was that the woman who captivated me all those months ago was sitting wrapped all around herself in the swing on the front porch. Her face was settled to the side resting one cheek against her knees with her arms wrapped tightly around legs that were pulled up tightly to her chest. The beat of my heart stuttered at seeing her like that. Part of me was in awe of her beauty once again. Another felt the hot flush of shame wash over me as it occurred to me that she may be tucked into herself because of all the shit I’d put her through in the past 24 hours. She didn’t even wait for me to put the truck in park in order to get out and help her into my truck. She simply got up from her spot on the porch swing and walked to the passenger side of the truck, hauled her butt inside, put on her seatbelt, was reaching for the door about the same time I came out of my stupor..

I had been standing there, just outside the driver’s side door of my truck, stunned stupid for a minute as I tried to figure out how to best approach this situation. “I’m sorry, I would have helped,” I started to say. I didn’t get the rest out though because she shut the door, barely giving me time to dodge out of the way before metal clicked metal and shut her away from me. Hell, she just missed slamming my fingers inside. Pissed. She was definitely pissed. Rightfully so, but I honestly wasn’t sure what to do with a pissed off and pregnant woman. To be safe, I did nothing except hop into the truck and drive. I backed us out of Merc’s driveway, taking note that Tiger Lily was scowling my way from the porch steps.

Once we were on the road the only noise was the sound of the engine and any other vehicles around us. Anna hadn’t even bothered to look over to my side of the truck once. Her eyes were glued to whatever she was looking at directly in front of her. She failed to move for so long I worried maybe she’d become catatonic or something. Did women just hysterically go catatonic when they grew too upset with a man? Fuck if I knew how they worked.

When we stopped at a light I took a chance and glanced over at her. She didn’t seem angry, she just looked to be resigned and sad. She must have noticed me watching her, and for the first time since she shut the door of the truck she moved. Of course, in doing so she turned to look out the window beside her instead of straight ahead so I could no longer see her face.

As I took off from the stoplight I glanced back over at her one more time. “Anna, I wanted to tell you how sorry I am for the way I behaved yesterday. It wasn’t fair to you and you damn sure didn’t deserve it. I promise, nothing like that will ever happen again.”

She didn’t respond, not even to flinch. I wondered, not for the first time, if I had broken her. Legitimate worry caused my chest to ache. I decided it was best to wait until we got home to attempt any further groveling. At least that way the rest of world wouldn’t have a front row seat to seeing me beg her forgiveness and how fast she was going to shoot it down. I knew at this point, I didn’t deserve it at all. I wouldn’t give it if the shoe was on the other foot. I’d already proven that much.

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