Page 17 of Bound By Longing

Damien, on the other hand, isn’t forcing me to be here. He’s not helping me either, I remind myself. He’s still just as dangerous as any other Bratva man.

At least he smells good, though.

“Tell me more about yourself,” he says, drawing me from my thoughts. That only makes me look at him and take in his handsome features. He’s distractingly handsome, like something off the cover of a romance novel. Bad and dark and handsome all rolled into one. He’s nothing like the prince charming I’ve dreamed of since I was a girl. That man was blonde and cherubic in my mind. I was also a little girl then.

Now, I’m a woman, though I still feel so young in so many ways. I’ve never been on my own like this. I’ve always been with my father or sisters. This new territory is strange and out of my comfort zone.

“Like what?” I ask, feeling stupid. If I were Vik, I would have responded in a flirting way (or a haughty way, knowing her). If I were Sofiya, I would be kind and gentle but still approachable. I just feel like a little girl sitting next to a man like Damien.

He smiles as he lights a cigarette and takes a hit. The prince charming of my dreams never smoked. “Tell me a secret.”

“I don’t have any secrets.”

“Come now. Everyone has at least one secret. Something no one else knows. I want to hear it.”

“Truly, I don’t have any secrets.” I grab a piece of my hair and start running it between my fingers. His eyes latch onto it, and he grabs my hand, lowering it to the booth. His hand lingers on mine before he removes it. My skin tingles from the touch.

“I’ll tell you a secret of my own if you tell me one of yours.”

“Is this like a game?”

He shrugs, taking another drag. “Sure. It’s a game. My secret is this.” He leans in close to me. I can smell the muskiness of him mixed with the cigarette smoke. I never thought I’d like the smell of cigarette smoke until now. “If I had my way, I’d bring you to the back room of the club and fuck you.”

I squeak and jerk back from him. “Uh …”

He chuckles as he sits back, running his finger along his jawline. It makes me more aware of his face, which makes me more aware of his intense eyes. “You don’t have to look so scared. Sex isn’t scary. It’s a way of life.”

“But I’ve never …”

“Of course, you haven’t. That’s why I want to fuck you. But I won’t. I like my women willing. So, now, it’s your turn.” His finger skims my thigh. “Tell me a secret of yours.”

“I don’t have any.”

“Mila, come on. Tell me.”

I swallow hard, even though my mouth is dry. What secret is there to tell? I was raised sheltered? I miss my dad every day? None of those are exactly secrets.

But the more I think about it, the sooner I realize there is something I’ve never told anyone before. Not even my father knew when he was alive.

“I compare myself to my sisters all the time. They don’t know about it.”

He tilts his head to the side. “Why not?”

“Because I’m embarrassed. I don’t want to sound insecure. They just seem to have it all together, and I feel like I’m flailing around, not sure where I’m going or what I’m doing. I’m … lost.”

“A lot of people feel lost.”

“Have you ever felt lost before?”

He smiles as he puts his cigarette out. “Are we sharing our personal feelings now?”

“Why not?” I ask, shrugging. “You wanted to know me. I … want to know you.”

“Why? You look terrified of me, so why do you want to get to know me?”

Why do I want to get to know Damien? The moment I’m able to return home to my family, I’ll never see him again. I shouldn’t want to get to know him.

But for some strange reason, I do.