Page 30 of Bound By Longing

“I do. I don’t want to interrupt your life. I’ll just go sleep in one of the guest bedrooms for the night and leave in the morning.”

“Let me show you, at least.”

“No. I can find it. You spend time with Nadia.” She hurries to the stairs and away from me.

Nadia flashes me her mega-watt smile. “It’s just you and me now, Damien.”

Staring down at Nadia’s beautiful face, I’m struck that she’s not the one I want. It’s Mila I’d rather be with.

But Mila is terrified of me, and Nadia is offering herself to me.

So, I smile back, grab her hand, and take her to my room.

MILA

I happened to accidentally choose the bedroom right next to Damien’s. I hear him and Nadia having sex all night. Even putting a pillow over my head doesn’t drown out the noise.

The sound of their lovemaking does … strange things to me. It makes me more aware of my body. It makes my breath come out faster. And it makes a strange heat settle between my legs.

But it also scares me. Damien is a man who has sex. An inexperienced man who knows much more about the world than I do. I feel like a little girl playing dress-up next to a woman like Nadia. She was so sophisticated, whereas I always feel just … cute.

I asked Nadia to stay because being alone with Damien is more than I can handle. He’s playing chess while I’m playing checkers.

I just have to wait until tomorrow so I can return home. Once I’m back with my sisters, everything will be all right, and I won’t have Damien playing games with my mind any longer.

Chapter

Seven

MILA

Iwake up a few hours later, distractingly thirsty. I don’t hear anything coming from the next room over. Good. Having to listen to Damien and Nadia have sex was a strange thing. I told him he could let Nadia stay, so in a way, it was my fault. I’d rather him pay her attention than me.

Though …

I don’t mind Damien’s attention, even though it intimidates me and scares me and excites me all at the same time. I shouldn’t want his attention. Vik would scold me for even thinking this way. Sofiya would be more understanding, but even she would gently try to remind me not to do anything stupid.

And having a crush on Damien is pure, plain stupid.

I slip out of bed as quietly as I can and sneak into the hallway. The last thing I want is Damien coming out and running into me. I just need a glass of water, and then I can go back to bed.

It’s still dark out, and when I see the clock on the wall in the kitchen, it says it’s only two in the morning. So many more hours to go before I can go home and get a clear head away from Damien.

I feel like an intruder as I grab a glass from the cabinet—which takes me a few minutes to find because I’m unfamiliar with Damien’s kitchen—and fill it with water. Taking a large chug, I settle against the counter. This isn’t my home. My real home is back in New York, but I had to leave it behind to seek safety from Mikhail and Aleksander.

But as the past twenty-four hours have shown, I’m not safe in Moscow either. Vladimir is still out there, probably waiting to get his hands on me. And Lev … I shudder. Who knew what he would do to me in front of all of his men if it weren’t for Damien saving me?

That’s the thing—I can’t get the memory of Damien saving me out of my head. He had no reason to, and yet he did. Granted, he also hasn’t helped me get back home. He’s not a good man, I remind myself.

I cannot crush on him.

The light turns on, and I gasp. Spinning around, I drop my glass, and it shatters to the floor. Before me is Nadia, smirking.

“Sorry,” she replies, walking past me to the refrigerator. She’s in nothing but a short tank top and underwear. I avert my gaze. I could never walk around my own house like that, let alone someone else’s. I’ve always worn my simple pajama pants and T-shirt. It’s not sexy. It’s comfy.

But right now, standing next to Nadia, I kind of wish my pajamas were sexy. It would make me feel like more of a woman.

I shouldn’t care what at all, of course. I’m not interested in Damien. I can’t be.

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