Page 11 of Baller's Surprise Baby

Blue Balls is doomed.

8

Everly

Iwalk to the room, completely numb, thinking about that funny cat meme that says ‘I cannot brain today. I has the dumb.’ That’s exactly how I feel, and I don’t know if it’s because I’m tired from traveling or because it’s late at night, or just the fact that Ryder and I are about to crash in the same hotel room.

The whole plane ride over he’s been so different. He was phenomenally attractive to begin with, and if I’d had any doubt, the ‘locker-room mishap’ as I’ve begun to label it in my mind, combined with two weeks of multiple photos shoots with him has put me in a super unprofessional position in which I literally have to make myself stop envisioning him naked. Never in my life has a model ever affected me this way, and all I can think is that this is my best friend’s brother, someone I’ve known most of my life and will probably know the rest of my life, so there’s no getting around the extremely personal aspect of this relationship.

Add that to the very sensual direction our conversation took on the plane, and I’m out. I’ve got zero self-control left. I’ll be dreaming about this man in the sack all night. This is a disaster.

When I get to the door, I fumble nervously with the card until Ryder steps close enough to reach around me and scan his card on the small pad. I catch my breath when he moves in close enough to smell his cologne and then realize my pulse is racing as the door swings open. We step through one at a time to find a small loveseat in front of a TV and a king size bed. Swallowing hard, I hazard a glance at the silent tower of a man beside me, and suddenly I feel shy.

“Um…I’ll take the couch,” I blurt. He swings his eyes around the space and grunts before tossing his duffle up on a small desk. I’m not sure how to take the silent treatment, but when he fidgets with his phone and then starts running his hands through his hair while attempting to stride back and forth in a space entirely too small for someone with his long legs, I feel a nervous sweat start to bead at my temples.

“So… I’ll just…,” I can’t even finish the thought as I drop my suitcase, grab my toiletry bag, and escape into the bathroom. Sheesh!

“It’s not that big a deal,” I tell myself while I wash up and remove what’s left of my eye makeup after a long day. I’m half tempted to leave it, but I refuse to seduce my BFF’s brother…probably. I mean, it’s unlikely that I’ll seduce him… or rather… unlikely he’s really thinking about me that way. Isn’t it?

“It’s not like I haven’t spent the night at his house a million times…okay, maybe not in the same room…but still…Ryder’s my childhood friend, and this is fine.” Or it would be if I didn’t have carnal knowledge of my temporary roommate, if I could forget the silky-smooth feel of his di- stop! I scrunch my eyes shut. I will not think about his penis! With a shake of my head, I finish up and take a deep calming breath as I repeat my mantra internally. This is fine. This is fine. Everything is fine.

But it’s not fine. And the second I step out of the bathroom, there’s no denying how heavy the air is. The room is full of our unspoken tension. I put my toiletry bag down and look up to find Ryder sitting on the edge of the bed, leaning forward with his head in his hands and his eyes on the ground, small curly locks of hair hanging forward over his brow. It’s clear that something is wrong, and I step forward tentatively.

“Ryder, is everything okay? Do you need something?” He doesn’t answer, so I pad a few steps closer to the bed and try again.

“Do you need to eat, or get a glass of water before going to bed?” He’s not looking at me, and I lean in just a bit more, trying to get a peek of his face. Without thinking, I reach out to gently touch his arm, but his reaction is an explosion that catches me off guard.

“Don’t touch me!” Stricken eyes stare level with mine as he springs back, his hands up, body tilted away from me. He’s still sitting on the bed, but he’s so damn tall that we’re practically face to face. I stare at him like he’s grown a second head when I respond.

“What?! What the hell, Ryder? It’s just me.”

But if anything, his eyes flash darker and I suddenly wonder if maybe I was wrong. Maybe it’s not fine. Maybe the old buddy I connected with on the plane is gone now, and we’re back to Mr. Antagonistic. I straighten up, hurt no doubt etched on my face when I raise my own hands in a gesture of surrender.

“No problem. I read you loud and clear.” But as I move to back away, his expression turns contrite and a hand snakes out to hook around my wrist lightly.

“I’m sorry, Everly. I…I’m having a rough day, and...” He grits his teeth, and his eyes look frantically from side to side as if seeking an exit.

“I’m going to leave. I can’t sleep here.” He stands suddenly, and I can’t help the immediate dismay I feel at having him leave me.

“Wait, don’t - ,” I respond without thinking and with no idea what I’ll say. “You don’t have to leave. I can camp out in the lobby tonight. It’s fine.” But he waves a hand to cut me off, and suddenly we’re speaking over each other.

“No, Everly, I can’t do that - “

“But, you have a game tomorrow – “

“You take the room, and I’ll figure out something else.”

“ - and I would lose my job if I was part of the reason you couldn’t get rest before the game.”

We babble at each other for a few more moments, each of us talking over the other, trying to get the other to listen, inching forward until my hands are on his chest and his are on my shoulders, and we suddenly quiet.

I hate that we’ve had two rough weeks, and I love that we had such a great plane ride over here. If I could just forget the moment I burst into his locker room, I think we could have really enjoyed being friends.

But I can’t. I stare up into his eyes and feel all of me wanting him, wanting this moment, an unspoken fantasy I’ve barely allowed myself to dream of ever since I laid hands – and eyes – on him.

“How can I feel so attracted to someone who makes me so crazy?” I blurt out.

Ryder’s brown eyes are positively gorgeous, framed in dark lashes with thick slashes of eyebrows above. I want to get lost in them, but they’re currently widened in shock. I laugh even as I feel a blush spreading across my face.

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