Page 136 of Riv's Sanctuary

“Eight.” He held up his hands and Lauren blinked. “Two of my hands, not yours.”

Lauren blinked again, her face contorting. “That doesn’t make it better, Riv.” Her voice went soft. “How could a mother do that to her own child?”

For a few moments, Riv didn’t reply. Then he released a breath. “I stopped asking myself that a long time ago.”

A sigh left him as he continued. This was obviously hard for him and she couldn’t believe he was telling her about it.

She valued the fact he trusted her enough to share such deep details with her. It was difficult speaking about something so harrowing.

“Sohut was two orbits younger. The Tasqal put us in the mines to work. We were too young for the harem.”

Lauren’s nostrils flared.

“But the mines weren’t any better. They reeked with sweat, death, and sex.” Riv let out a labored breath. “I can still smell it as if it was yesterday.”

“That sounds…I can’t imagine what that must have been like.” She reached out and touched his shoulder. Her heart was bleeding for him. “I mean, I was taken from home and thrown into a glass cage, but…it’s nothing like what happened to you.”

He managed to smile a little, a sad one. “I guess we’re not so different. Your life was ripped apart and there was nothing you could have done about it.” He focused in front once more. “There was nothing I could have done about it.” He paused. “For many years I blamed myself. If I’d been a better chid, maybe my mor would have wanted me.”

Lauren gripped his chin and turned his face toward her.

“It was never your fault. What your mother did was inexcusable.”

Riv nodded.

“I know you’re right. But that doesn’t erase the fact that I had to go through hell to reach this point.” He paused. “I learned a long time ago, in the mines and after, that beings can’t be trusted. No one in my life had been trustworthy. Not my mor, not the beings working in the mines…by the time I ended up at the exchange I knew I could trust no one.” He met her gaze. “Every single being up to this point, bar Ka’Cit, Geblit, and Sohut, has proven to me that beings can’t be trusted. You just have to give them time to show you that truth.”

Lauren continued to stroke her fingers across his cheek and he closed his eyes briefly and leaned into her hand a little.

“Do you understand what I’m trying to say?” He searched her gaze. “I thought you were like that.” He paused. “Out here, I don’t have to worry about being betrayed. The animals are not like other beings. And you…” He paused. “You’ve been nothing but perfect the entire time you’ve been here.”

She almost choked at hearing that.

Her?

Perfect?

Before she could respond, Riv looked ahead once more.

“Riv?” she asked. “Why are you telling me all this? Why now?”

Riv sighed. “Well, I’ve been trying my damnedest to avoid you, if you haven’t noticed.”

She smiled at that.

“I failed. Miserably.” He glanced her way. “Now I think this is the least I can do. Allow me to give you the gift of freedom from the Tasqals. It is what I’d have loved for someone to do for me.”

29

They pulled up at the exchange and Riv grasped her hand as he hurried down one of the streets toward a tall building, Grot keeping up with them as they hurried through the crowd.

Hood over her head, Lauren kept her head down as they weaved in and out of the throng of shoppers, trying to get to their destination.

She gripped his arm, thoughts on everything that he’d told her in the hovercar.

She had known there was something deeper about him—something that pulled her to him, despite his gruff demeanor.

And now she knew.

---