Page 59 of The Book Swap

“I can sort it.”

He sighs. “You’ve got your own life to live. Speaking of which, a letter came for you this morning. I was about to send you a photo. An invitation from Frome College, to speak at their careers day. Apparently they have you marked as quite the success story.”

I frown. “Me? Are you sure?”

“Yup. Addressed to you. They want a reply as soon as possible. Anyway, I’ll see you soon. Better go wake up Henry the hoover and hope he’s had more sleep than your mother.”

I try to laugh. I know he just wants to ease the tension, but I can’t. Dad’s doing it again. Giving up his life’s dream. I can’t watch him do it. I’ll find a way to make this happen for him.

“Okay, Dad, bye.”

He follows up with a photo, and there it is. The Frome College logo and an invitation for Mr. James Parr to speak at the careers day in September. I imagine walking back into that college as a different man, with everyone I knew there now gone.

Leaving the park, I push open the door of the bookshop and walk inside. I know I need to tell Erin the truth. This can’t go on. It means the next book I give her will be the one where I explain everything. Where I say goodbye, and I need it to mean something.

My watch vibrates, to announce an email, and I grab my phone, staring at the preview on the screen.

Hi James,

Thanks so much for sending this through. I look forward to reading it.

Best,

Sophia

23

ERIN

16. How did you know you wanted to be a writer?

I’ve always known, I’ve just been too afraid to act on it. I’ve grown up in fear of not having enough money to live on, and I chose the path that would stop that from ever happening. I couldn’t understand anyone who chose to follow their passion, whether they could afford to or not. I judged them for it. Answering this has helped me realize something though: I judged them because I was jealous. I wanted to do what they did, but I hadn’t allowed myself to. If I’d started after school the way I wanted to, who knows where I’d be by now. But I know that’s no one else’s fault but mine. They were brave, and I wasn’t.

17. Do you have brothers or sisters?

I have one older brother. I actually just came back from visiting him. We’ve grown apart over the years and your comments about your sister made me want to try to rebuild things.

18. Are you close to your parents?

I think they are the bravest and best people I know.

19. If you could live anywhere else in the world, where would it be?

Having just read On the Road I’m now pretty keen on the idea of a road trip across America, but I’ve found myself running away from things I need to face recently, and I think I need to be braver now. For that reason I try not to imagine my life anywhere but where it is right now. (God, that was an intense answer? I should have just written Florida!)

20. Who is your favorite person in the world?

Right now, my nephew, because he makes me feel like a superhero. He also has the most eclectic taste in children’s books and I’m a changed man from having read them. I might even leave you one for our next exchange!

“He is absolutely your boyfriend and the more you deny it, the redder your face goes.”

Cassie, Georgia and I are sitting in an Italian restaurant in Covent Garden called Ave Mario, to celebrate my thirty-first birthday. From the outside it’s underwhelming, but on the inside it’s filled with neon lights, big mirrors and hundreds of real, fresh flowers. It’s breathtaking as you walk in, and the smell that fills it is almost as good as the food itself.

“You know the rules about birthdays, Georgia. You’re not allowed to be mean.”

“Ah, but Cassie didn’t know that rule, so she’s exempt.”

Despite having never met before, by the time starters had arrived Cassie and Georgia were already chatting away. Now we’re mid mains and they’ve formed a united front, particularly when it comes to Edward.

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