I pull out my phone and message Elliot.
19
ERIN
“I’m gonna move out,” Callum says with a cough when I have the displeasure of bumping into him in the kitchen midmorning. It’s a weekday, when once again he should be at work, and isn’t.
“How have they not fired you?” I ask as the kettle boils.
He reaches above me and takes a mug, putting it beside mine and nodding toward the coffee. I’m not sure how I could ever have had sex with him.
“How do you still not have a job?” he fires back.
I move my body as far away from the French press as it’ll go before pushing the plunger down. He frowns at me and shakes his head. I couldn’t be happier that Callum’s moving out, but there’s also no way I can afford this rent on my own. I’m hardly surviving as it is. I’ll have to start putting adverts up. End up with some total random living in the flat with me, just to afford to stay. Callum knows that. He’s taking pleasure in doing it.
Pouring myself a coffee, I walk back toward my room, leaving Callum’s mug empty.
“There’s no need to be a bitch about it,” he says, and I spin around.
“I’m not being a bitch, I’m prioritizing myself. There’s a difference—which you’d understand, if you had any respect for women.”
“Fucking hell, Erin,” he says, pouring a coffee for himself, and his accent, which I used to quite like, suddenly sounds like the most irritating thing in the world to me. “You’ve got some serious problems, mate.”
“You shouldn’t even be here,” I shout. “You should be at work! Like normal people.”
“You can fucking talk.”
“I’m unemployed, not lazy.”
He shakes his head, wrapping his hands around his mug but not moving.
“You’re like...a child trapped in an adult’s body. Sending little love notes to some boy in the back of a book. Quitting your job because your boss was mean to you. Sitting in your room, crying or talking to yourself. Your only friend’s your sister. At least I live in the real world—I’m not hiding in my bedroom, living in the past. Like...get a life, Erin.”
I turn away, taking in a shaky breath. My head spins for a moment and I close my eyes. Try to shake off everything he’s said. It’s Callum. Of all the people to have an opinion on my life, his should matter the least.
He stares at me, the corners of his mouth suddenly twitching. “Can I have my T-shirt back? I need to pack it.”
I look down at myself, shaking as I realize I’m wearing something of his. Pulling it up over my head, I throw it at him and spin around, walking back into my room and slamming the door.
“And the sea is fucking real,” I shout, chest heaving as I lean against the door.
My phone flashes from the bed with a message, from Cassie.
Cassie: I felt so bad about lying about the cat I went on a second date with her! Yes, I’m a sucker for punishment. No, I still don’t fancy her. Yes, I told her the truth. Onward and upward.
Cassie. She hates where she lives. She always used to say if she had more time, she’d find somewhere else.
Erin: Can’t believe you went back in for another date!! Sounds like your day might need some brightening up, and I MIGHT have just the thing...
??? she replies.
Erin: My awful housemate is moving out. Don’t suppose you want to move in with me?
I bite my lip as I send it.
Cassie: OMG!!!! This has made my YEAR. Proper reply later. Charlotte is ON ONE today! LIVING for my lunchtime Zumba class so I can get the hell out of here Xxx
There were moments throughout living here when I thought Callum and I might become friends, before the ridiculous nighttime antics begun. He could make me laugh sometimes. Showed brief moments of kindness, in among all the silence and TV watching. Then I would realize that I was pinning too much hope on him, because of James.