Page 92 of Shadows of Perl

“The scars will heal, but the nightmares never will.”

“I don’t care,” she says through gritted teeth. She presses her shoulders back, straightening her posture.

“Whenever you’re ready, nephew,” Beaulah says. And I may as well be twelve, standing over Ollie’s lifeless body.

My own pins catch my eye, and a reckless anger burns through me. My brother’s words come to mind again. There is more to the pins than accomplishment. They’ve linked me to this place, and its practices, for far too long. Maybe that’s what he meant. My phone buzzes in my pocket.

Yani: You need to see this. Location incoming.

“You don’t need this,” I tell her, holding up the box. “I understand you want it. I wanted it, too.”

“Pin me, Jordan, right now,” she says. The watching crowd begins to whisper. There’s nothing I can say to make her change her mind. The entire House is on the line. Hartsboro would be better in her hands. It’s the consolation I hold on to as I grab her sash.

“Adola Perl, Marked daughter and heiress of House of Perl, you’ve earned two distinct honors for valor and loyalty. Pin or not, you are the bravest person I know. And one day you will be the most heralded leader this House has seen in a century.”

I feel the burn of Beaulah’s stare on my skin.

“If you receive this honor, say I accept.”

“I accept!”

I press the pin through the fabric and the crowd explodes in excitement. Blind, all of them. Beaulah shoves a cup in Adola’s hand and urges it to her mouth.

None of this is okay. And turning my back on it doesn’t make it go away. This was my home, a House of great history. But it’s run like a cult. My phone buzzes again.

Yani: Pls hurry

“Jordan, are you sure you can’t stay?” Beaulah presses.

The sight of her face only boils my rage. Heeding my gut instinct, I snatch the six virtue pins off my chest, one by one. In at least this one thing, she will know I don’t approve.

Adola gasps.

“What are you—” Beaulah starts.

I hug my cousin one more time and whisper, “You’re better than her. Be better than her.”

“Jordan?” Beaulah still gapes at me, flabbergasted. The crowd watches. She shifts uncomfortably. “Everything’s fine, friends. Please make your way to the celebration. Adola, run along and get cleaned up.”

No one moves.

I toss the gold pins at Beaulah.

And something over me breaks.

Thirty-Two

Quell

I awaken and the world is quiet. My body pinches with pain all over. A rocky ceiling towers above me, and the floor beneath me is hard. The time in the forest comes back to me in a rush and I sit up. That’s when I spot it: a wolf licking an oversized bone. He notices me and bares his teeth. I try to pull on my toushana, but only a whiff of cold answers from my purpling fingers.

I lug myself to my feet and the beast stalks toward me. A few others shift from the shadows. I summon every ounce of anything I have left and tighten from my center, pulling at the thread of cold. It roils in me a little stronger. I put more distance between us, skirting piles of bones littered all over the ground.

“Come on,” I summon my toushana again, but my magic is spent. I grab and brandish the largest bones I can find, waving them in the air.

“Go on! Get out of here!”

The beast lunges at me and I run.

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