Page 68 of Possess Me! (I Want You To)

If they were a threat.

If they got in my way.

If they hurt what was mine.

“Oh, well.” Luca perked up again. “Is it weird that that only makes me like you more? Like, earlier I was thinking about you. And I realized you kinda remind me of a rabid bulldog.”

What?

Well that was…random.

“Yes! Because they’re all cute until you get up close to the fence and then—if they’re a good guard dog—they bite you! But anyway. Sorry. That’s beside the point. What I meant was that you’re loyal, like dogs are. You decide who your pack is, and you stick to it.”

I don’t have a pack.

“I’m your pack.” He said this with such surety it made my heart stutter and that same tingling feeling begin to buzz all over me again. I worried he could feel it too.

You are not my pack.

“Yes I am! Look at us—espionage-ing together. Braving life-threatening vehicles. Making secret plans. You like me.” Man, he sounded so sure about that. “You totally like me, and we’re friends now—we shared fries, Prudence. And orgasms—so…yeah. We’re a pack!”

We’re not wolves, Luca.

“I mean, yeah. But that’s not the point! The point is, you’d fight for me. I’d fight for you. We’re in this together and that makes us…you know…something pretty special.”

We’re something, alright. He ignored my sarcasm.

“See?! Here I am, putting up with your asshole-ry. Not caring that you’d hurt things, or even kill them, should the situation arise. Because solidarity, Prudence. And also because I know you won’t hurt me. So there. Tell me I’m wrong. I dare you.”

Because I know you won’t hurt me.

Guilt gnawed away at my insides. It was syrupy, thick and heavy as it weighed me down, and I struggled to find the words to speak. I wanted to reject him. I wanted to deny what he was saying. The part of me that had always fought, wanted to hurt him just to prove a point.

What he was saying couldn’t be true, could it?

I hadn’t even felt this loyal to my sisters, and they were…well…family.

“It’s your turn now, you know.” Luca broke the silence, the tension in his shoulders gone, his knuckles no longer pulled tight and white where they gripped the steering wheel. Apparently my lack of response was answer enough. He looked practically chipper. “I asked you a question so it’s only fair.”

Right.

Momentarily derailed, I decided what I wanted to ask. Something had been bothering me but I hadn’t addressed it yet. I’d gone through his bedroom multiple times and found bin after bin of art supplies and yet…no art? It made no sense. I knew he was an artist. The first time I’d seen him he’d been trading his work for my talisman after all.

What happened to all your artwork?

“Oh. Shit. That’s a long story. If you really wanna know, I gotta explain a bit.” Luca tensed up all over again. I watched in fascination as he glanced in the side mirror to check his blind spot and I got a glimpse of the haggard twist to his lips. They were bitten raw and red and I wanted to soothe the torn skin with my tongue. If I bit him I was sure he’d bleed. My cock twitched.

Later, I reminded myself.

“So, I’m an artist,” Luca started, clearly unsure how to begin.

Yeah, I gathered that.

He continued, ignoring me, “It’s my career of choice. I’ve always loved it. And honestly? It was going really well for a while. I was making money, like looots of money. People loved my shit. You couldn’t catch me without a paintbrush in my hand.” He laughed self-deprecatingly. “But when shit hit the fan suddenly I just…couldn’t do it anymore. Painting has always been stress relief for me, a way to get my feelings out. I’m lost without it. I’ve tried. Believe me. I have. But even just looking at my art now makes me want to cry. So I sold it all. Which was great. I made up for some of my losses, and I didn’t have to see the paintings anymore. I always just figured the money I made would tide me over till inspiration struck again…only it hasn’t. And I’m starting to think it won’t. So yeah. Artwork, poof. Gone-zo. I may never paint again.”

He said the words carelessly but I could feel the way his heart was breaking at the thought.

Amanda had always said you couldn’t force inspiration. That it came to you when you least expected it. Maybe if Luca survived this, he’d find our adventure could chase away the last of his demons. For now though, I was still curious.

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