Page 21 of Forever Wild

“No problem, Mr. Walker.” Seeming to note our silence, she heads back into the kitchen.

Watching her leave, JT turns to me. “So you’re not fucking the bartender, though she apparently would be willing if asked…”

I sigh, mentally preparing myself for the come-to-Jesus JT clearly needs to have with me. I’m getting better at spotting them. “Why are you here, JT?”

He takes a long drink. “Isn’t it obvious?”

“No, it’s obviously not obvious, or I wouldn’t be asking. So why did you fly your happy ass all the way from California? It can’t just be for the sake of my bubbly personality.”

I decide to wait for him to say what he needs to say, so I turn in my seat, slowly perusing the course through the windows. Shit. The girls must really be gone. It hasn’t been anywhere near this quiet and still since they arrived.

JT’s eyes follow mine, scanning the area. “So, despite seeing the girl drive away, you’re still looking for someone? Interesting. I haven’t seen you this distracted by something that wasn’t in the bottom of a bottle for a while now.”

“Nope, not searching for anyone. Just trying to figure out why you’re here, and why you are speaking to my little sister when the two of you can’t stand each other.”

It’s true. In addition to the chaos they’ve caused at Thanksgiving with refusing to sit at the same table as one another, JT and Lila’s hatred of each other has been a thorn in my side for the last few years. Ever since Lila turned eighteen, it’s like she and JT can’t handle being in the same vicinity as one another. I don’t even bother inviting them out for drinks at the same time anymore, which really sucks, since they are two of my best, and only, friends.

“Oh, trust me, I still can’t stand Lila. Unfortunately, she is apparently worried enough about you to break the long-term silent treatment she has been giving me since she hit puberty and is instead texting me daily to ask me when I’m going to”—he makes those annoying little quote things with his fingers—“grow a pair and come talk to you.”

I turn to face him fully. “And why does Lila think you need to come talk to me?”

He sighs heavily. “Damnit, Jameo, you know why she thinks I need to come talk to you. The same reason I agreed with her enough to fly to the middle of nowhere to actually talk to you. You’ve had a shit year and followed it up by isolating yourself in the middle of godforsaken Kansas out here—”

“We’re in Colorado, man. Check a map.”

“Oh, okay, well, a very flat, no-mountains-in-sight Colorado doesn’t really count as Colorado. It might as well be Kansas.”

“I think you should ask the staff about it. I know for a fact that they love when people tell them about how this isn’t really Colorado,” I deadpan.

He rolls his eyes, pushing a hand through his hair before putting his hat back on. “Jameo, chasing after a random townie today was the first time I’ve seen a spark of life in your eyes in over a year. So yes, I’m worried about you. Your sister is really worried about you. She called me. On the phone. Your basically gen Z sister put a phone to her ear and actually talked on it, to me, to convince me this was a trip that I had to make. Turns out she’s been talking to your parents and Jon, and they all decided I was the only one you wouldn’t just kick out the minute I walked through the door. So cut the shit and tell me how you are really doing.”

Well, crap. I know the last year has sucked, and I have been failing on the course and off it, but damn, when he puts it that way… I hadn’t realized how worried everyone was about me. I can’t, however, stop the hurt that builds up in my chest. “What the hell? You all are talking about me now? What, do you have a meeting once a week to talk about how big of a fuckup I am and then vote on who has to come hang out with the poor loser?”

“Jameson, cut the shit.” The deep blue of his eyes burns as he glares at me. “You know that’s not how it is. We all love you, and we’re all worried as shit that you’re losing yourself in the pool of darkness Alexis threw you into.”

He’s not wrong. Not that I expected him to be. JT has been my best friend for a long time, and while being in the same sport naturally makes us competitors, it’s never felt that way. He’s a smart, truly good-hearted guy. No one, apart from Lila, has ever had anything but good things to say about him. Even the press can’t seem to find anything to dig in to other than his truly terrible decision to continue to be my friend last year.

“Fuck, man, I know,” I say. “I just—Fuck. Misplaced anger, I think is what my therapist would call it. I’m really glad you’re here. And I’m doing pretty well. I played the best round of golf in a while this morning. I’m finally getting my swing back. I’m not drowning myself in booze every night. I’m going to be back this year.”

He looks me up and down. “You do look like you’ve been hitting the gym fairly consistently. Or…have you just been chasing after a lot of women in cars? I suppose there’s more than one way to get back in shape.”

“Didn’t you hear? That’s how women want to be picked up. Chasing after their cars is the new foreplay. Just you wait, she’ll be back to find me later.”

JT raises his eyebrows, clearly amused. “Damn, things have changed. Here I thought it gave off desperate-stalker vibes.”

I chuckle, relaxing back into my chair and finishing my Stella in a long drink. “Honestly, I’m doing okay. There are days when everything still feels so out of control that I can’t mentally get myself where I need to be with my game, but for the first time in a while, I’m feeling like there might be a light at the end of the tunnel.”

“And does this light have anything to do with the blonde we were chasing out of the workout room?”

I pull on the bill of my cap, annoyed with myself for how poorly I behaved during that interaction. “No, but also yes. That girl—whose name I’m not even sure I’ve been told—is the friend of the girl who I golfed with today. And, shit, I think she might have something to do with me finding my love for the game again.”

“Why were you chasing her, then?” JT asks. “Like a complete stalker, might I add.”

“Yes, yes, you’ve mentioned the stalker part. I may have incorrectly assumed she was interrupting my workout to suggest a booty call. The evidence now suggests she was there to talk to me about her friend, Bryn—the girl I golfed with this morning. When Bryn asked me to golf with them again this afternoon, I turned her down. Which is likely for the best, but I’m not so sure now.”

“When are you going to stop assuming that every girl just wants to use you and walk away?” he asks, a slight grimace spreading across his face.

“It’s not the walking away that I’m worried about. It’s falling in love only to find out that all they wanted was my money, my name, my fame, but never me.” I take a deep breath. “But blondie wanted none of those things. And I don’t understand it, but I can’t stop thinking about the sarcastic girl who ruthlessly ragged on me, even while I was handing her her ass on the course. The one who never once seemed to care about who I am or the size of my bank account.”

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