Page 4 of Out of Focus

“Funny? Funny? Is that what you were trying to be, you big-chested wanker? Because I do not find it funny that you just propositioned me. And how about the fact that you’re my sister’s bodyguard, and you didn’t even know I was in here.” My face must be as red as a tomato. I can feel it. The anger is burning me from the inside.

He scoffs. “Aw, come on, red, that’s not fair. You had the code for the gate and the front door. It’s not like you broke in, and I failed to stop you.” I hate that he has a point. He knows it, too. That stupid smug smirk on his face tells me so.

“What?” I screech. “This is your entire job, how?—”

“Why don’t we have something to drink and catch up, Char? I’ve missed you!” Maeve cuts me off before I can pick an even bigger fight with the bronze wall of muscle in front of me. She’s right, though. I would much rather catch up with my twin than bicker with a stranger.

“You ladies enjoy. I’ll be out of your way.” He shoots us a salute and walks out the same way he came in. I inhale my first full breath since the moment I first heard his voice.

I’m not sure why I’ve agreed to come to this with Maeve. I don’t like big events with so many people and all these photographers around, but she insisted I be her date tonight. Her bodyguard is also here, but he’s been quite professional so far, and we haven’t said a word to one another since we met a few days ago.

Unfortunately, I have eyeballs, so of course I noticed just how good Rafael looks in his charcoal suit, white shirt, and black tie. His hair is a little longer on top than the sides, and there’s a bit of a curl to the nearly black locks. I flex my fingers, pushing away the need sparking at my fingertips to feel how soft those curls must be.

I’ve been hiding in the bathroom of the green room Maeve had been waiting in. There were so many people around, all moving so quickly, and I started to feel dizzy from the commotion. Maeve was pulled away briefly, and Rafael went with her. Left on my own, I suddenly felt itchy with the need to get away from it all, but they should be back any moment.

I’ve just finished washing my hands to give myself something to do when voices carry through from the main room.

“I just think you can make more of an effort to be friendly to her, Raf. She’s introverted.” Maeve is talking to him about me? Why?

“So are you, and we’ve never had an issue.” That’s his rebuttal? I’m certain he wasn’t caught nearly having phone sex with a woman when he met Maeve.

“You know it’s different. We met under different circumstances, and you weren’t purposely trying to make me squirm. Plus, I know how to deal with pretty boys like you who are far too used to women throwing themselves at them.” Maeve doesn’t completely clam up when new people speak to her. Not like me.

“Chuck just needs to loosen up. I thought maybe I could help her do that, but she’s too… I don’t know… stuck up to even talk to me.” Ugh, I hate that he calls me Chuck. No one has ever called me that before, and my temples throb in anger. And stuck up? I am not stuck up! “You know I would never make a move on your sister, Maevey. I was just goofing around when I met her. Obviously, I made a mistake thinking she could take it. But she can’t. I can tell by the death glares she shoots me every time I’ve walked in the same room as her these past couple of days.”

He clears his throat, and I have the urge to do the same as a cluster of unnamable feelings become lodged in there. But the need to keep listening to Rafael’s opinion of me is far too strong, and I definitely don’t want to be caught.

I wish I could see his face. All I picture is him looking arrogant as he proclaims his obvious distaste for me. Thank goodness the feeling is mutual. Still, the rejection stings more than I want it to. I press a hand to my chest to suppress the ache. It always comes when I know I haven’t met someone’s standards. I don’t want to date Rafael, but hearing him say he would never want me? It hurts. I lean on the wall for support as the embarrassment engulfs every inch of my skin. The burning sensation starts at my toes and climbs all the way to the tips of my ears.

“I just wish you two could be friendlier. She’s my sister, and you’re one of my closest friends. Can you just go easy on her, please? Charlie is… delicate. If you got to know her better, you’d understand.” I don’t like my sister imploring her friend and bodyguard to be nice to me. I hate that she’s dancing around my symptoms, but I love her so much for not sharing more of the details.

“Maybe if she gets that giant stick out of her ass, sure. I’m perfectly civil. She’s the one openly scowling and calling me names. My hands are tied here, M. Why don’t you set her up with one of your pretty-boy co-stars? Maybe getting laid will help her prickly personality.” What a total jerk! As if he gets to have any opinion on my sex life! He really is disgusting.

I hear a distant knock on the door, and a few seconds later, it opens. A third voice comes into the room. “Miss Howard, we’re ready for you now.”

“All right. Let me just send this text quickly. I need to let my sister know to meet us back here.” I check quickly that my phone is, indeed, on silent, not only because we’re at an award ceremony, but sometimes, all it takes is a ring or the ping of a text to send me over the edge. I let out a sigh of relief, knowing I won’t get caught listening in. “Okay. Ready. Come on, my fearless protector.” Maeve lets out a little laugh, and I hear Rafael’s deep chuckle. I close my eyes as the goosebumps rise on my arms and tell myself it’s because I hate the sound of his stupid laughter so much. Despite my body’s reaction to him, he is not someone I want to befriend.

3/

may i touch you?

rafael

now

“If you think you can do it better, why don’t you?” Her voice cracked on the last word, telling him everything he needed to know. She was nervous.

“Is that what you really want?” He stepped closer as he asked the question. His eyes drifted away from hers for only a moment and landed on her lush, red lips. She nodded and swallowed. “Words, beautiful. I need your words.” Another step closer.

“Yes, that’s what I want. I want you to?—”

“Whoa!” I see a flash of bright red hair, and then a body crashes into mine and promptly lands on the pavement in front of me. Were her eyes closed?

“Ouch. That’s going to leave a mark.” She lays her head back on the sidewalk, apparently not giving a shit that people have to walk around her. Her arm lands over her face as she lets out a noise somewhere between a growl and a whimper. I didn’t even know that was possible. “Crikey. It really bloody hurts.”

“Where? Where are you hurt?” I take her in from head to toe and fail miserably at not noticing her thick thighs or how her baggy T-shirt has ridden up her torso to reveal a sliver of creamy white skin, and damn! This girl’s body is bangin’. I can’t see where she’s hurt herself, and she still hasn’t answered me, so I crouch down, pause the book I had been listening to—which was just getting to the good stuff— and ask her again. “Can you tell me where you’re hurt?”

“I think it’s mostly my ego if I’m honest. I’m so very sorry. I was just getting into this groove, and I closed my eyes for only a second, I swear—” She’s still covering her face when I interrupt her, smiling at her comment and cute British accent.

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