Page 68 of Lost Love Found

“OK, so Adam managed to pull two orgasms out of me, and we haven’t even been properly naked together yet.” Maeve has a wicked smile on her face as she clutches her wine glass with both hands. She's downright giddy. I had told her about us kissing when we last spoke, but I had made no mention of anything else. Now she’s hearing it all and enjoying it far too much, as far as I can tell!

“This is the best thing I’ve ever heard. You’re falling in love! It’s wonderful!” She’s so genuinely happy, smiling at me like she’s just announced a diehard fact like baby rabbits are called kits, and not at all the stomach-turning, brain-exploding proclamation that has me in a full-blown meltdown. She sees my eyes nearly bulging out of my head and quickly backpedals.

“Oh, no, Bon. Don’t freak out. Come on, you must have known these feelings were growing into something more than just like, no?” I start breathing heavily, sweat is building up on my forehead. “Oh, shit. You really didn’t, did you? Oh, come here!”

She pulls me into a tight hug. “I don’t love him, Mae. I don’t. I can’t. I haven’t…” She just keeps hugging me until my breathing slows.

“OK, Bon. So you don’t love him. But you have feelings for him, yes?” I nod, swallowing hard. “And he has feelings for you. That much is crystal clear, yeah?” I nod again, wiping the sweat from my face. “So just be happy, babe. This is a wonderful thing. He’s a great guy and you’re the best person in the world. You deserve to be happy! Do you hear me?” I nod again, numbly. “Say it, Elaina. Say ‘I deserve to be happy.’”

I look at her, incredulously, but she’s not budging. “I deserve to be happy,” I mumble. She’s still looking at me disapprovingly, clearly not satisfied. “I deserve to be happy,” I say again with more pep. She smiles and sips her wine.

“Good girl.” She gives my hand a squeeze and I relax my shoulders a little more.

“There’s more,” I say before taking two giant gulps of my wine, nearly emptying the glass. “I’m flying to New York to meet him and the director he’s working with for a new movie he wants to produce. Oh god, I shouldn’t be telling you this. He hasn’t told anyone. I just found out.”

“Bon. It’s me. You know my lips are sealed.” I exhale loudly. Of course. She’s my best friend. Of course, I trust her. “And Adam wants to bring you in?” I nod and tell her all about the books, how I’ve been telling Adam about them since I read the first one, how he saw one of my sketches and this is just the kind of story they want to tell. This time Maeve’s bright smile makes me smile, too. “This sounds like exactly what you were looking for. Something you’re passionate about. It’s perfect!”

“Yeah, I’m excited about it. And the director is Judith Keller! She’s a complete renegade and such a fucking talent. Like major bucket list person to work for. I’m a little nervous about meeting her, actually.” I take a couple of deep breaths because it feels like I haven’t breathed since I got here. “But I’m not putting pressure on it. It’s just a meeting.” I smile, almost believing my own bullshit. “OK, I’m going to stop talking now. I want to hear what’s happening with you. Are you feeling any better after those few days in Malibu?”

Maeve’s cheeks flush and she fidgets with the hem of her shirt before looking at me. “Yeah. I’m much better. It was just a stressful few weeks and I think my body was trying to tell me to slow down.” She takes another sip of wine and I swear her eyes well up a little. “Thank you again for the flowers and all that food and the muffins. You really are the greatest friend in the world, you know?”

“Nah. You know I'm always down for a batch of muffins anyway.” I smile at her, taking her hand in mine this time and squeezing. “You can tell me, you know? Whatever it is, Maeve. You can tell me.” She nods, looking down at our hands. “I won’t pressure you, but I want you to know that no matter what’s happening in my life, it’s not more important than what’s going on in yours. Not now, not ever.” She nods again, meeting my eyes this time as she wipes a tear from her cheek.

“Can we please cut into whatever you brought with you now? The smell is driving me crazy. Is it chicken pot pie?” Her eyes brighten and she stands to pick up the food I set down on the coffee table. Adam may not get the chicken pot pie obsession yet, but Maeve sure does.

“Yes! Let’s eat. Chicken pot pie and apple crumble. It seems we both need all the comfort foods right now, so let’s get to it!” We rush to the kitchen to grab plates and end up just digging into the pies with our forks, moving on to chatting about Charlie and Raf, the charity she's working with, and what she’s wearing to an award show next month. We're sprawled out on the living room floor, talking about anything and everything in between mouthfuls of pie. The easy familiarity between us makes me feel comfortable and happy.

Just before I leave, I get an email from Kelly with my flight details for tomorrow. I’ll leave late in the morning and be there for dinner with Adam and Judith. Perfect.

29

are you kidding me with that skirt?

adam

Thank god, Raf was able to come to New York with me. Being here on my own after having to deal with the board and lawyers and my mother’s tantrum over dad’s new girlfriend would have been too much. Pile that on top of everything that’s happened with Elaina in the last few days and my brain is mush.

We promised one another to take this slow, to see where things go because she doesn’t want to get into a serious relationship again, and I respect that, but it doesn’t change the fact that I’m having a really hard time following through on the whole going slow part.

We’re sitting in the living room at my apartment when Raf breaks me out of my thoughts. “You’re doing it again, A.”

“Huh? What am I doing? I was just sitting here.” I look down at my glass of scotch, swirling it around. Raf laughs, openly calling me on my bullshit.

“Right. As if I don’t know you. What is it this time? Your parents? Elaina? Judith?” He raises one eyebrow when he says Elaina’s name. We haven’t talked about what happened in Hawaii. “All of the above?” I look at him and give him a sideways smile. Even if we can’t talk about Elaina, we can talk about the other two things, so sure… why not?

“OK, well, you have lawyers dealing with your parents now. They made their bed and now they can lie in it. You’ve got one foot out the door of that board anyway, so what do you care?” OK. He has a point. I don’t really need to think about my dad’s drama. Or my mom’s. That was easy. “Judith just needs the right story. I’ve been reading the first book in that series Elaina won’t shut up about. She bought me a copy after I kept stealing hers. It’s good, man. And you know Elaina is going to make that shit come to life like no one else can.” His one eyebrow goes back up and we both know which topic he’s about to tackle next.

“Apparently, you’ve figured out more of my life than I have. That’s great, Raf.” I roll my head back on the chair I’m sitting on, waiting for his next words of wisdom.

“Yeah, that much is clear.” He chuckles as he leans in, resting his elbows on his knees. “What’s the deal with you and Lainey? You haven’t said anything about Hawaii, but you’re different. You’ve been different for a while. Did you tell her how you feel?”

“Different how?” I wonder if he’ll let me avoid the topic of feelings.

“Well, for starters, you smile all the time. You’re a pretty cheerful guy, but this shit is next level.” He puts up two fingers now. Oh good, he’s counting. “You get all spacey all the time, and I know you’re thinking about her because you get a goofy, sideways smile on your face.” A third finger goes up. Shit. “You’re nice to people. You ask drivers and assistants what their names are. Two weeks ago, you brought a whole ass bakery to the studio. You’re a nice guy, but again, next level.”

When a fourth finger is waved in my face, I get the distinct feeling I’m not gonna like what he says.

“And lastly, even though I could go on, you will go to any length to bring her into your day-to-day. Yesterday you asked me, ‘Have you noticed how Lainey closes her eyes when she takes the first bite of food?’ and when a PA asked you how you take your coffee and you said ‘two sugar, three cream’ even though you take it black, and I know for a fact that Lainey likes her coffee to taste like dessert and not a shade darker than beige. But my favorite is the fact that you’ve watched every single thing she’s ever worked on and you bring up her movies in literally every conversation possible.”

---