Page 7 of Lost Love Found

“Why get surgery on New Year’s Eve?” He almost sounds like he’s back to normal. The previous disgruntlement is barely present in his voice.

“I promised myself I’d do it this year. I’m always so busy with w-o-r-k and I kept making excuses not to get it done. Thankfully, my ophthalmologist was OK with a December 31st surgery and here I am.” I chuckle, but there’s not much humor in the sound. “I didn’t think it’d be this bad, to be honest. I figured I’d be able to see within a few hours.”

He’s silent for a beat and I think he’s using my ‘waiting for the person to keep going’ tactic.

Quickly, I prattle out, “Also, I’ve been meaning to do this for about two years, and my ex always hated the idea of me not being able to cook dinner for the evening. He didn’t do takeout. Or his work schedule was too crazy, and he couldn’t handle the stress of me being in recovery without him around. Or he had to travel and didn’t want me to be alone because I might set my house on fire or something if I couldn’t see. There was always a reason.” I say this all stoically because it’s all true. Ben was a real piece of work.

“What a fucking asshole,” he says this barely loud enough for me to hear. “Please tell me you're the one who ended it with this douche canoe.” He lets out a loud breath.

“After I found out he had been cheating on me for two out of our three years together? Yes, I dumped the douche canoe.” I smile proudly because this honestly doesn’t even bother me anymore. Also, I really like that he used the term douche canoe.

Silence. For a long time, this time. But not awkward, which is… alarming considering we’ve only known one another long enough to bake a batch of muffins!

“You know I can’t see you if you’re making weird facial expressions at my over-share about the idiot I broke up with last year, right?” Now I’m worried. Maybe this was too much all at once. Damn my rambling ways!

“Sorry, I’m just trying to process how a guy manages all that asshollery and gets away with it for that long.”

I laugh, mostly because he sounds so serious and the word asshollery is so perfect. “Honestly, I’m still not sure. But I don’t dwell on any of it. His cheating had a lot more to do with him than it did with me.”

“Hmm. You’ve obviously got a great therapist.” He says this with zero judgment or condescension in his tone.

“Oh yeah. I’ve had several, actually.” I smile and wiggle my eyebrows up and down. “But enough about Ben and his cheating, smaller than average, severely crooked cock. Your turn to share something deeply personal with someone you just met hours ago.”

He makes a choking sound, then spits out, “Did you just describe your ex’s penis to a near stranger? I think I’m a little in love with you, Lainey.” And we both burst out laughing for a long time. His laugh is wonderful. It bubbles up from deep within and escapes in a rolling rumble that reverberates through me like a bass line. It leaves me feeling warm and filled with joy. I really wish I could see him laugh right now, too.

I put my face in my hands, actually feeling slightly embarrassed, but also a little free, speaking so candidly like this. Normally this is reserved for friends only, and the fact that I’m talking like this to a guy is… surprising, to say the least. “Alright, Adam. Go on.”

He clears his throat and takes a deep breath. “Um… let’s see.” I hear him scratch his head, or maybe it’s his beard? “I’m a huge Harry Styles fan. He seems like such a cool person and I really like his music.”

Silence again. Because I am SHOOK.

A strange gurgling sound leaves my mouth. “Sorry. You mean like the guy that used to be in One Direction, right?”

“Yes, Lainey. That’s the guy.” I like the sound of my name out of his mouth way too much. Way, way too much. “I’ve never told anyone about my Harry Styles admiration, so this is a big deal, OK? It’s no cheating ex, but there isn’t much to tell when it comes to my love life, anyway. So, Harry Styles it is.” I swear I can hear the shrug of his shoulders.

I laugh again, because I can’t hold back. I hear him laugh softly, and I can feel him looking at me. Like all over me. And that crazy ice-lava thing is happening again. Chills. Heat. All at once.

“Hey Adam? I think we need to be friends.” And just like that, without planning it or trying or even being able to see, I might cross another item off my list and I'm feeling damn good about it.

did i just get friend-zoned?

adam

The sound of her unrestrained laughter and the brightness of her smile are contagious. My body feels lighter, and I know I made the right call coming in here instead of going home, or worse, staying at the party. I can’t take my eyes off of her. There’s a dimple on her left cheek and she throws her head back when she laughs, revealing the long line of her neck. The whole thing makes me want to take a picture of her just so I can look back and see what joy looks like on someone as beautiful as her. From the tips of her black, painted toenails to the now lopsided russet-colored bun atop her head, I can’t look away.

When she says we need to be friends, I immediately want to respond in two ways:

1. YES! Talking to her is so easy and I’m not ready to stop. I don’t remember the last time I talked to anyone for longer than 15 minutes and couldn’t wait for it to be over.

2. Damn, did I just get friend zoned before she even sees my face?

So, I go with, “I’d really like that, Lainey.” And the way her whole face lights up tells me I picked the right response. “OK, new friend, we need to get some fundamentals out of the way.”

“For fuck’s sake, Adam, if you tell me you hate puppies, don’t eat ice cream or think Friends is overrated, I am reneging on the friendship comment!” Her face is serious in a way that tells me those things are actually important to her, but also that she wouldn’t actually judge me if I was lactose intolerant.

I chuckle. She’s funny, and I don’t even think she means to be. And I like that she swears. I’m around people who want to do nothing but be their most proper, rehearsed selves all the time, so this is refreshing.

“No, nothing like that. I love animals, ice cream is one of my favorite things and I can’t hear the word ‘pivot’ without laughing.” In true form, a snort of a laugh escapes me, thinking about that damn episode with the couch. “But there are essential things we need to know about one another to understand our friendship compatibility.”

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