Page 46 of Lost Love Found

I blow out a breath. “That was some kiss, River.” I turn my head so I can see him and the moment I say his name, he flinches and I feel as though I’ve made a terrible mistake.

“Um, right… sorry. Was it too much?” OK, so maybe not a terrible mistake. He seems fine. And didn’t correct my use of his stage name…

“No, no. Not at all. I’m sure Sandra will see it soon.” I give him a crooked smile because I don’t know what to do with my face at this moment. I want to scream. I want to jump his bones. I want to run away.

He turns his face towards me. “Elaina, I’m sorry. I wasn’t thinking.” He takes my hand and draws a couple of circles on my knuckles before speaking again. “I need you to tell me if any of this is ever too much. I don’t want to overwhelm you or make you uncomfortable in any way. You have to know that.” Those baby blues are beseeching and steady. So very steady, as Adam has been since the first moment we met.

“I know that. I do. I trust you, Adam.” My voice cracks and I feel a twinge in my gut as I say the words, because I don’t even believe myself. I want to trust him, but something in me just can’t. Not completely. “And I promise I’ll tell you if it’s ever too much.” That I can commit to.

He lets out a loud breath and looks down at our hands. “OK. OK. Good.” He squeezes my hand as he stops the car. “I trust you, too. Completely.” The valet attendant opens the door for me, and I slip out quickly. Adam takes my hand into the crook of his elbow and smiles down at me as we walk into a dimly lit restaurant.

19

does everybody know?

adam

We’ve made it to dinner, but before getting here I needed a cold shower. The colder, the better. I can’t believe I fucking kissed her like that, but goddamn it, the worry in her eyes felt like a punch to the gut, and before I knew it, she was pressing her lips on my forehead, my nose, my cheeks. I was overcome with the need to feel her lips against mine, to taste her. Our mouths collided and my heart swelled with a wave of emotion that was more intense than anything I've ever felt before. This kiss wasn’t soft and timid like the others.

Any worry I had that she didn’t feel what I felt vanished when her body molded into mine. I just wasn’t thinking about how quickly people would be pulling their phones out to take pictures and videos of the whole thing. I turned my phone off because I can’t bring myself to see what’s already out there an hour after the fact.

As we walked back to my trailer, a chill ran down my spine and I couldn’t recognize it. It wasn’t the usual fear or anxiety that came in the past when I even thought about being with a woman. No, this was more like awareness that the fear wasn’t there. It was the awareness that this felt like something we should be doing every day. That I want more. That I will always want more with her.

She’s been quiet and distant since the whole thing happened and I was afraid I’d overwhelmed her with the kiss, and then she said, That was some kiss, River. Fuck. She called me River. That felt like a punch in the nuts. Did she think I did that as River? That I was just faking it? Is that what it was for her? Was the concern nothing but her playing the doting girlfriend? I have so many questions.

“So… I have questions.” She peeks up at me above her menu, her long lashes almost touching her cheeks before she looks up. I lean back in my chair, raise an eyebrow, and motion for her to continue. “How’s your eye? Does it hurt? Did anything else get hurt?”

“It’s fine. It’s a small cut, and doesn’t need stitches, but it’ll probably bruise. Head wounds bleed a lot, so it looked worse than it is. It doesn’t hurt much, and I didn’t get hurt anywhere else. I think you did a pretty good job of checking for other injuries to my face earlier.” I smile at the memory of her leaving kisses on my face and she blushes.

“Yeah, I guess I did.” She bites her lower lip before continuing. “Where did you learn to fight like that, anyway? And do you work out every day? Because I’ve never seen you work out, but there’s obvious proof that you do because…holy fuck… abs and biceps and more back muscles than I’ve ever seen on one person before.” She blushes again and I savor this little rant of hers. I love her potty mouth and that it works faster than her brain, so she says things without fully thinking them through.

I laugh, but I don’t hate that she noticed. “I’ve been training for the last eight months for this role. Yes, I work out every day. I have for years. And don’t forget my perfect ass. I recall you telling me I have a remarkably good butt.”

She scoffs. “I don’t think I said th— Oh my god, I did. When I was drunk. I said you have a perfect ass.” She covers her face with her menu. “Oooook, I’ll just be over here behind this menu all night, thanks very much.”

I pull the menu down. “None of that. I tell you that you’re beautiful all the time. It was about time you said something nice about me, even if it’s not about my face.” I can’t help my smile because nothing feels more like ‘us’ than this kind of easy banter.

“You don’t need to be told.” She rolls her eyes, and her voice has a mocking tone to it. She puts her menu back up and then brings it back down a second later. “That ass is pretty tight, though.” And that’s when we both burst into laughter. I take hold of her slender fingers and bring them to my lips, pressing gentle, reverent kisses against the back of her hand. When I slowly flip her palm up, I see her emerald eyes widen and her laughter fades away.

“You guys are adorable. Would you like more time with your menus, or have you decided?” Our waiter is back, smiling at Elaina and me with an expectant look on his face. She seems to have forgotten how to speak, so I clear my throat, quietly urging her on.

“I’ll have the burger, please. Thank you.” She calmly hands him her menu, smiles at him, and takes a drink of her water.

“Same for me, please.” The waiter leaves and I place our hands on the table. “You OK?”

“I’m great. This is… lovely.” She traces the shape of my knuckles with her index finger, then frowns when she looks at my hand. “You did get hurt. Your knuckles…” Her eyes come back up to mine and she stops the movement of her fingers.

“You don’t have to stop doing that. They don’t hurt.” She frowns at me again. “It was just from the last two days of shooting. No pain. Promise.” She smiles at me, and her hand remains on mine, but she stills any movement.

“Thanks for inviting me today. And I’m sorry if I overreacted and made a scene. It was just a little scary when you went down like that…” She swallows, biting her lips, her eyes not leaving my knuckles. So that was real?

“Lainey, I’m OK. I promise. We were done shooting anyway and I won’t have to do any more fight scenes. You don’t have to worry, OK?” I lift her chin towards me and kiss her lips once, then her jaw and neck. I feel her body relax a little more with each kiss.

She lets out a shaky breath. “OK. I’ll stop worrying.”

We eat in comfortable silence, but her eyes don't meet mine for the duration of our time at the restaurant. I sense her lingering concern and kiss her temple throughout the meal, hoping to soothe her fears. This girl of mine and her great big heart.

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