Page 105 of Obsession

You wanted him to care about me, I realize in slow horror. So he would do this. So he would volunteer.

Even when I thought I had power. Even when I believed I was fighting for my dignity…

I was a pawn. Again.

Yes, Mary.

Aris’ eyes shut briefly, his throat bobbing, realizing the truth just as I do. His expression is pained.

All of a sudden, I’m crying for a new reason, my face twisted and ugly. More layers of deception. More betrayal. Why did I think Jaegen was the good guy? How could I have been so stupid?

I don’t get it. I shut my eyes to block out Aris’ expression. The worry there. The love—that I fostered, that I created, all to serve Jaegen. How did you know that he'd... care for me? You took such a risk.

Risk? Jaegen’s amusement is dark, his hold so tight. I welcome the sting. It's almost comical to see how little you've caught on.

Caught onto what?

He doesn’t have time to respond, for Aris is saying, “If I do that, if I give myself to you, will you let her go? Leave her in peace?”

“Yes. You have my word.”

Not that it means anything.

Jaegen ignores me, and Aris glances my way. There’s no fear on his face, only determination, and I know what he is going to do. For him, here is only one choice.

No.

“Aris—” I start.

"I relinquish myself," he says simply.

"No!"

Jaegen shoves me to the ground, and something twists, my wrist smarting, but I don’t care. Hardly feel it. I get to my knees as Aris’ body disappears, becoming black, swirling mist that Jaegen swallows.

No.

No.

He did it. He actually did it.

Aris gave himself up. He’s dying. And, as Jaegen gulps and swallows the mist, his body growing larger, glowing with new power, it’s like I’m dying, too. My life flashes before my eyes: The cell. The Institute. The betrayal. Jaegen, our deal. Deceiving Aris. The cabin with Aris.

The beach with Aris.

The waterfall with Aris.

Aris.

Aris.

Aris.

I crawl toward them one-handed, sobbing, moving closer to the gods and the bonfire. All I can think is Aris’ name and the word no and how he’s dying and how I can’t let him die. He told me that I’m powerful, but I can’t do anything as I watch him be consumed.

Eaten.

I should want it; I know that I should want it. This. His death.

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